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I’m not lazy . . .

I’m just busy. So here’s another meme, this time from Mr. Fab:

Things that scare me:

1. Vegetables
2. Ugly people
3. Long pants

People that make me laugh:

1. Sarah Silverman
2. Bill Cosby
3. Steven Wright

Things I love:

1. Bacon cheeseburgers
2. Television
3. Michael J. Fox

Things I hate:

1. The uneducated
2. The ignorant
3. The rest

Things I don’t understand:

1. American Idol’s popularity
2. Why cake isn’t healthy when it has eggs and milk and flour
3. Where babies come from

Things on my desk:

1. A tower of Diet Coke cans
2. A pile of porn, comic books and magazines
3. Jolt caffeinated gum

Things I’m doing right now:

1. Swordfighting
2. Speaking with a sexy Spanish accent
3. Cutting a “Z” into everything

Three things I want to do before I die:

1. Buy a villa in Italy
2. Buy a home in California
3. Streak through a high school

Things I can do:

1. Pound my chest
2. Throw feces with unerring aim
3. Challenge other gorillas and win

Things you should listen to:

1. Me
2. Avril Lavigne
3. Gwen Stefani

Things you should never listen to:

1. Your conscience
2. Anyone on a street corner who is clearly homeless
3. Justin Timberlake

Things I would like to learn:

1. How to read
2. Why it’s not good to punch people when you first meet them
3. How to assemble a nuclear weapon

Favorite foods:

1. Bacon cheeseburger
2. Filet Mignon
3. Birthday cake

Favorite beverages:

1. Diet Coke
2. Diet Coke with Lime
3. Hot chocolate

TV shows I watched, books I read as a kid:

1. The Hardy Boys
2. The Judy Blume novels
3. The Great Brain series
4. Encyclopedia Brown

Things I like about Avitable:

1. He’s funny.
2. He’s obviously a fucking genius.
3. He’s damn sexy.

And that’s it for today. If you’re up for it, steal this and do it yourself.

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