We spent this weekend going through our various receipts and bills for 2006 to gather everything that needs to be tabulated for our taxes this year. Home office deductions, charities, corporate loss, my second company's profit and loss - it all needs to be registered so that we can figure out what type of refund we'll get. And we will get a refund, because after a scare a few years ago when we almost had to pay $3,000 in April, my wife has had an extra few hundred dollars withheld from every paycheck, guaranteeing some type of refund.

But, looking over the last year, I cannot believe some of the money we spent! Here, for your voyeuristic pleasure, is a sampling of our expenses:

1. $2,376.00 on Internet and Television
2. $6,684.00 on Electricity
3. $9,610.00 on Comic Books
4. $7,380.00 on paying other people to take care of our things (pool, lawn, housecleaning, etc.)
5. $2,492.00 on Fast Food
6. $1,430.00 on Diet Coke
7. $15,600.00 on Dining out at nice restaurants
8. $24,380.00 on Amazon.com
9. $2,998.00 on Razors
10. $1,112.00 on Anal Sex Toys
11. $31,456.00 on Underage Thai Prostitutes
12. $1.00 on Deodorant
13. $10,049.00 on Novelty Gag Gifts
14. $6,969.00 on Miniature Pony Statues
15. $134,998.00 on Ebay Items that look like Jesus (toast, a piece of drywall, a skid mark, a glass of Alka Seltzer)
16. $45,800.00 on all of Britney Spears's hair (vaginal, facial, and head)
17. $1,011.00 on Nipple Clamps
18. $4.50 on Men's Clothing
19. $1,390.00 on Women's Clothing
20. $44,399.00 on Professional Art Classes

In retrospect, seems like money well spent.

Read archived HaloScan comments

If you're new to the horrors of Avitable.com, don't miss out. Subscribe to my RSS feed!