I've heard from some people that my posts are never serious, never dramatic, and never evoke any emotion other than a laugh.
People think I'm too guarded or just don't like to share, but it's not true. The real reason is this: I'm not a serious person. Sure, I take my job and my company seriously, and I take my wife seriously and my responsibilities. But I approach everything in life with a sense of humor. Whether it's death, stress, money, whatever - I have a joke, a story, or something funny to say about it. I will tell you anything about my life - nothing is too personal - and there will probably be a hilarious or embarrassing story to go along with it.
If someone dies, I'll be the one telling the funny story. If someone is angry, I'll be the one who can disarm them by making them laugh. If someone is despondent, I will make them smile through the tears. This is not a lack of respect or concern for others - it's my fundamental belief that laughter is always the best medicine. For any situation. If you can laugh, you can start to think clearly again about whatever the situation might be. Nothing is so dire that it's not funny.
Humor, my coping mechanism, might seem like a cop-out or cheap to some people, but this is how I deal. It's how I deal with the level of stress that I have on a daily basis. It's how I make sure that I can face my responsibilities and my life with a clear head and razor focus. It's how I make other people underestimate me. And it's why, whenever there is adversity, I will be on top every fucking time.
Whether it's a whoopie cushion or a pratfall, a dirty joke or a personally embarrassing story, a self-deprecating jab or pointed satire, humor is funny. How's that for deep?
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Wait a minute.
You're funny?
Why didn't I get that memo? :doh:
Comments by WeaponM
Although I write pretty serious crap, humor is my coping mechanism too...well that and coming up with new "bad" words.
Comments by Hilly
Wait, was this post serious or funny?
Comments by Mist 1
I have a serious side, but like you I find that laughter is the best medicine. I figure if you can't laugh at life you'll be a miserable fucker for life, and I don't want to be like that.
Comments by Donna
personally, I thought the "fisting" post was deep...
Comments by bluepaintred
That's Avitable for you! Humoring like nobody's beeswax. Take him or... take him!
Oh and thanks for putting up
for me! Now I can die happy! Kbai. 
Comments by Talamasca
I use humor/sarcasm as my defense. If I didn't, I would be crazy and on all meds known to man.
Comments by usedtobeme
I think that's a very healthy way to live. Maybe you should provide lessons for the rest of the world.
Comments by DeniseTN
Actually, I think that your serious side is reflected in some of your posts — always with a dash of Avi humor. Laughter is the best medicine, that's why I like your blog so much! :lmfao:
Comments by Geeky Tai-Tai
Bah. Why use humor for a coping mechanism when food will do just fine? Tsk...
Comments by RW
I think humor is a wonderful quality! I could never be friends or have any kind of relationship with anyone who hasn't got a sense of humor. And people use all kinds of stuff as a coping mechanism. If you can use humor for that I think that's great!
Comments by DutchBitch
Who the hell brought the room down? What's wrong with Avi being funny? And I agree with BPR, without you I wouldn't have spent 3 hours reading about the Christians fisting each other. :drool:
Comments by Poppy
i applaud your approach to life, and share it myself. but i have to disagree with those who say your posts only ever elicit laughter. that whole 'milkshake' thing is the most terrifying thing i've ever seen.
:rock: :rock:
Comments by part-time buddha
I don't think there's a better way to live life.
Seriously.
:D
Comments by stephanie
Woah, don't go misquoting me and twisting my point.
A) I like to think that I'm funny and I am ALWAYS the person to make an inappropriate situation more so with humor. You KNOW that laughter is my coping mechanism.
B) I didn't say that you should NOT be funny here. I love that you're funny. And outrageous. And way over the fucking top here. :-D
C) I was simply pointing out that there is a DIFFERENCE between what you put up here and what other people post sometimes. I was just pointing out that you're not really 100% you here - you're the class clown here.
And everyone LOVES a clown - but they are always surprised to find out that there is MORE to the clown (and they won't find that here... )
Your blog is a stage for entertaining the masses - and you do that very well. But that is very different from a blog that is part stage, part journal, part sounding board for millions of random strangers.
Shit. I don't judge you, fucker.
Comments by Miss Britt
I don't know about never evoking any emotion other than a laugh. Most of the time you scare the heck out of me too. Don't ever change. :kiss:
Comments by Dragon
WeaponM, it takes a certain degree of sophistication to properly appreciate it. It's okay - you'll get there someday.
Hilly, like cockburger?
Mist1, it's supposed to be weepy.
Donna, yeah, people who never laugh are the worst.
BPR, deep inside your vagina maybe.
Talamasca, the things I do for my readers.
Usedtobeme, yes. If I didn't cope in that way, I'd be royally fucked.
Denise, I should just close down my company and become a funnybone consultant.
Geeky, that's definitely what I'm going for. My serious side is always punctuated with humor.
RW, good point. Food makes you fat, and everyone knows fat people are automatically jolly!
DB, same here.
Poppy, nobody brought the room down. I just decided to talk about it!
PTB, I know you watch it every night before you go to sleep.
Steph, thanks.
Britt, I wasn't misquoting you. I was just using what we talked about to discuss something that had been brewing for a little while. I definitely think you're funny, too. IDJYF!
Dragon, scared is good, too.
Comments by Avitable
I have an uncanny ability to make a bad situation worse with my sick sense of humor. Luckily people who know me usually get it, the others are usually extremely offended. HA. Laughter is important!!!
Comments by themuttprincess
I...can't...hold...back...the...tears :sad:
Comments by Mistress Yoda
I'm SO with you on that, avi. Laughter is the most important thing of all.
Comments by Webmiztris
Lauging is evil because it burns calories.
Comments by WeaponM
I'm either against humor or my anti-sycophant gene is acting up again. I wish you would stop initiating that inner debate in my mind, Adam. :eyebrow:
Comments by RW
First off - I want an avitar. How the heck do I upload mine. I may be as hairy as you, but I'm blond hairy, so the default doesn't work.
Secondly - If I want serious I'll go somewhere else. I come here for heaping helpings of Donkey Porn and as a form of religious obligation.
Comments by Kal Jones
WOOO HOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! I have a GRAVATAR!!!!
Er, oops, I mean -
Don't try to soothe me Bitch!!! It is ON like donkey fucking KONG!!
(psst, btw, did you see my new myspace headline?
)
Comments by Miss Britt
Dude, I didn't know until just this minute that you even HAD a category for 'serious'. I thiught it just went 'funny', 'angry', 'pissed off', 'enraged'.
Wow. I guess you really DO learn something new every day.
I need an emoticon with a spoon. :help:
Comments by Tracy Lynn
TMP, my wife can say something and everybody reacts in horror. I'll say the same thing and everybody will laugh.
Mistress Yoda, it's okay, come here and put your head on my shoulder. Don't mind the groping or the erection.
Dawn, I definitely know you live that way.
WeaponM, yes, but less wrinkles.
RW, you can agree without being a sycophant, fucker!
Kal, go to http://www.gravatar.com. Choose an image, upload it, and then confirm it. You'll be all set.
Britt, Donkey fucking Kong? I think I have that movie.
Tracy, I just created the serious category for this post. I'll work on that spoon smiley for you.
Comments by Avitable
Wow. That WAS deep.
About a whole six inches on the Pillsbury Dough Boy Belly Scale.
Woo-hoo!
Seriously though... its totally understandable... and I used to be the same way... until I realized that by making jokes about someone's relative who I just pronounced wasn't quite seen as funny by the family. I couldn't understand why... because the jokes were killing me.
Comments by NYC Watchdog
Comments by Amy
You are such a good friend...even when your morals are at an all time low.
Comments by Mistress Yoda
I understand that completely. I guess we just trained people to not get their undies in a bunch over what we say.
Comments by themuttprincess
You really need to give classes, people could learn from you.
Couldja' start HERE please? :dazed: :crazy:
Comments by Tug
NYCWD, gallows humor definitely has its time and place.
Amy, thank you! So you're siding with me?
Mistress Yoda, I'm always happy to hump your leg.
TMP, yeah - it takes conditioning.
Tug, can't teach an old dog new tricks! :whistle:
Comments by Avitable
I have an urge to sing "that's what friends are for"
Comments by Mistress Yoda
I RESEMBLE THAT REMARK!!
And I was talking about my "boss" anyway :whosnext:
Comments by Tug
Comments by liquid
Ignore the naysayers. Serious is boring.
Comments by cat
Mental Note: Send Avi a whoopie cushion...
Comments by Mr. Fabulous
wah. avi is YELLING at me!
Comments by RW
Mistress Yoda, I think you should. Topless. And then send me the video.
Liquid,
Cat, thank you!
Mr. Fabulous, one that explodes, please!
RW, it's just my outside voice.
Comments by Avitable
Comments by Amy
Your principals? You mean, people who run a school administratively?
Comments by Avitable
Fucking brainsucker. Principles. OK. FUCK.
IDJYF!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Comments by Amy
Your approach to life is much like that which my husband and I shared. What's life if you can't laugh at it?
Love the new smilies, BTW...
Comments by Amanda
OK, so I see, most of the "normal" smilies are gone, but at least you left this one!!
That's most important!!
Comments by stephanie
That is why we love you! Because you have no shame.
Comments by heather
a merry heart does good like a —-
whoa. booty. and boobs
Comments by Crys!
Comments by Crys!
Comments by Crys!
Love the smilies!
Comments by DeniseTN
Yeah... nice smilies! Heh...
Comments by RW
Not one single thing wrong with funny. I like funny. Funny is good. I also like the new diggs! Cool joint ya got here!
Comments by Katie
Amy, it's okay, Brittard.
Amanda, exactly.
Steph, I saved the martinis just for you. Has your book arrived yet?
Heather, you just say that because you blush way too easily.
Crystal, I knew you'd like those!
Denise, thanks. I plan on giving credit to you and a few others for some of the ones I got.
RW, you lecherous old man you!
Katie, thanks! I like funny, too. And boobs.
Comments by Avitable
No Buffy yet - waiting for Buffy...
I'm not sure why I felt that was appropriate, but go with it, k?
Comments by stephanie
Ow. Thee has rendered my :eyebrow: moot! Villain!
Comments by RW
And you take complete advantage of that.
Comments by heather
I'll see what I can do.
Comments by Mistress Yoda
Steph, it should be there soon. And that's what I'd love to do to Buffy. Or Joss Whedon.
RW, do I need an eyebrow smiley?
Heather, yes I do.
Mistress Yoda, you work on that.
Comments by Avitable
Agreed - but add to the list Allison, Nicholas and Seth, k?
Comments by stephanie
And Charisma and Anthony Head!
Comments by Avitable
And, how the hell could I forget James??? I love me some Spike!
Comments by stephanie
Get RW his EYEBROW smiley will ya?
Comments by Geeky Tai-Tai
STFU. I have too been here. Just lurking. So there. kthnxbai.
Comments by hot coffee girl
I'm one of the people who has said this about you.
I'm sure you're serious. We don't live with you. We don't know how serious you are. We get all haha all the time.
It's my belief that people who can't be serious...who joke constantly...are hiding deep personal trauma.
Now you've told me that you have never been hurt in your life and that everything has always been perfect for you...which I don't believe even a little bit...which is why you're so light-hearted.
BUT I don't see you as serious because all I see is this blog, a blog full of well, nothing but jokes.
Get it?
PS: Just the fact that you told me how perfect your life is, is what makes me call you guarded.
I sincerely believe, based on what you write here, that you have a lot of pain hidden beneath the comedian.
And that is why some of us have trouble believing you can't be serious and can't take off the mask.
Comments by Miss Ann Thrope
Oh, I forgot. I have an excellent sense of humour. I use it liberally...but there's a lot more to me than a laff a minute.
Just saying.
Comments by Miss Ann Thrope
Steph, yeah, he's awesome.
Geeky, why, when he's got so many other awesome things to choose from?
HCG, finally!
Miss Ann, I was hoping if I brought that up, you'd come by and comment! :) You do have a great sense of humor, too. I wasn't implying you didn't. I know you'll never believe me, but nothing bad has ever happened to me. I have landed on my feet in every situation, I'm happy, and I've never had any personal trauma. I'm quite honest about things that matter, too. Someday I'll have you talk to my wife, who has always called me The Issueless Wonder, and she can tell you that there is no mask.
Comments by Avitable
I'm just glad I'm not you. I'd be underneath my bed waiting for the other shoe to drop.
Still, I would examine why I was unable to be serious if I were you. Seriously.
Oh, this page maxes out my cpu because of the smilies...maybe a popup box like EE and MT have?
Comments by Miss Ann Thrope
I'm trying to figure out how to do a pop-up with it. The plugin has that option but it doesn't work.
And someone like me will deal with the other shoe if and when it drops, and he'll catch it and put it on.
I'm glad you still care enough to come by and comment! I thought you didn't
me anymore!
Comments by Avitable
Oh yeah.
Since I am completely contrary I need to point out that you used the word, "cope."
To cope with something suggests a problem or difficulty.
Freudian slip?
Comments by Miss Ann Thrope
I have stress from the responsibilities of my work. I've had family members die. I have to respond in some way, and I chose to use the word "cope" to describe how I respond.
Are the smilies hidden for you now? I'm testing something new.
Comments by Avitable
I don't see them but there's no way to access them. Keep working.
Comments by Miss Ann Thrope
Okay, I'm using that javascript that makes things collapse and expand. If you click the "Click for Smilies" link, does it expand them?
Comments by Avitable
yep. works for me.
Comments by Miss Ann Thrope
Ok, thanks.
Comments by Avitable