So I’ve seen a few of you doing these lists of 100 things about you. Some have them on your sidebar, some are posting them in small pieces, and some have posted them all in one post. I think it’s egotistical, self-aggrandizing, and indulgent. I’m in!
The current plan is to break it into 5 groups of 20 things, with each group having a different theme. We’ll see if I can stay with that consistently.
100 Things: Me and My Family
100. My father’s family is Italian.
99. My mother’s family is Irish and Nova Scotian.
98. I have four uncles, three who are my mother’s brothers and one that is my father’s brother.
97. I was born in Weymouth, Massachusetts.
96. My parents were both born in Massachusetts as well.
95. I am the eldest of three siblings. I have a younger sister and we have a younger brother.
94. I moved to Ormond Beach, Florida (right outside Daytona Beach) in 1980, when I was three years old.
93. I have three living grandparents. I had four until my Nana passed away a couple of months back.
92. My father’s family came from Naples. The Avitable (and Avitabile) name is very big there. There is a statue to General Paolo di Avitabile, who was well-known in Italy and feared in Pakistan. In fact, his name (Abu Tabela) is used as a bogeyman to children in Pakistan even to this day.
91. I believe that my maternal grandmother has been able to trace her family back to the Mayflower, which is amusing, because the family drinks like Irishmen right off the boat.
90. I have never met any Avitables other than my uncle and cousins. I would like to, someday.
89. My mother’s family is quite large, and, in fact, she is older than her youngest uncle. As a result, most of the family members who are my age are actually my second cousins.
88. My grandmother’s brothers used to live in a very poor part of Massachusetts and were a bunch of thugs as kids. The Learys were a bit of a gang back in the 40s and 50s.
87. My mother liked my father because he was a bad boy who drove fast, was a bit older, and got into lots of fights, including throwing someone through a plate glass window. He was arrested many times as a teen and young adult, and it was only because of the good old boy network and my grandfather’s connections that he doesn’t have a record.
86. Before my parents married, my mother and father either broke up or almost broke up because she wasn’t sure he was willing to settle down. My father hitchhiked cross-country, and when he got to California, he realized how much he needed my mother and came right home to her, smelly and dirty from over six months on the road without a shower or bath.
85. Three of my uncles don’t have more than a high school diploma, yet they’re all successful businessmen.
84. While I have never hit on any of my cousins, many of whom are objectively attractive, my brother tried some cheesy pick up lines on my cousin on Myspace.
83. This same brother also set up a Match profile when he got out of the military. After choosing the parameters of the girl he was looking for, only one result popped up: my sister.
82. Both of my siblings work for me currently.
81. I’m not sure, but I may be the first person in my mother’s side of the family with a doctorate.
80. I am Italian and Irish, but I hate Italian food and Irish food. This vexes my parents.
Enjoy this post? Try these:What you’re missing RIGHT NOW by not being friends with me on Facebook or Google Plus
100 Things for 2010: Part One
Famous moms in history
I think I need to start one of these. Anyway, I too am half Italian and I loathe Italian food. Marinara sauce makes me gag more than the biggest cock on the planet!
Reply
How can you hate both Italian and Irish food? What kind of man are you?
Reply
I am Italian as well, and my husband is Irish. For the record, I LOVE Italian food (if it is prepared authentically. I do not go for most of these Italian restaurants that claim to be authentic, when you taste the food, you can tell it isn’t. Luckily, before my grandmother passed away she taught me how to cook, and also willed me her cookbooks. :clap:
On the other hand, I don’t think I have ever had Irish food. Maybe at my in-laws, I’m not sure.
Reply
Twitter: nycwatchdog
says:
You don’t like “da meet-uh-balls”???
What kind of an Italian are you???
Reply
Goddammit. I’ve been working on my list for a year and a half and you’re already further along than I am.
Reply
21 one things. i’m anal like that !
:sex011:
Reply
So ehm… this kinda #83/#84 thing… Does that run in the family? That’s frea-key!
Reply
There is such a thing as Irish food?
Reply
“In fact, his name (Abu Tabela) is used as a bogeyman to children in Pakistan even to this day.”
I’m sure some day your name will too be used as a bogeyman to children in Pakistan.
Reply
There are actually only about seven people on Earth who don’t like Italian food. A handful here and the rest in Pakistan.
But allow me to second Mr Fab’s question; what Irish food? I’ve been to Ireland and I can say this; you don’t exactly go there for the food.
Reply
You shouldn’t have trouble meeting other Avitables, it sounds like there’s a least one in every Pakistani closet.
Reply
This post made me smile.
Your brother is a pervert.
Reply
Hilly, we could be twins! Marinara makes me gag more than a big cock, too!
Sheila, one who likes American cuisine and that’s about it.
Angel, if it has sauce and pasta, I don’t care if it’s Olive Garden or an original family recipe. It’s still bad.
NYCWD, meat-a-balls I like. It’sa the rest of it thata I don’ta like.
Joefish, I like the way you were doing it, but I just needed more substantive information.
Jhajha, as I finished writing it I realized that, but then I figured most people who read this blog can barely count to 5, much less 20, so I was okay.
DB, isn’t it? Freaks me the fuck out, I’ll tell ya that.
Mr. Fabulous, haven’t you heard of Bennigan’s? Heh. Actually, it’s things like corned beef and cabbage, which is more Irish-American than Irish, but it’s just like Italian food made here, too, in that sense.
Heather, it is. That is my name.
RW, I just can’t see the appeal of pasta and marinara.
Erratic Scribbler, I’m hopping a plane right now.
Poppy, yes, he is. I guess, in some ways, it’s clear how we’re related!
Reply
YAY i made the list! poor sean, he needs to brush up on his geneology before hitting on people. i took it as a creepy compliment tho
Reply
Twitter: missbritt
says:
“I am the eldest of three siblings. I have a younger sister and we have a younger brother.”
I’m sorry, but it tears me up how perfectly this sentence was written.
Reply
Julianne, can you confirm that information about your side of the family?
Brittaburger, you’re such a fucking dork. But I :heartbeat: you anyways.
Reply
There are Italian foods that do not include pasta and marinara, but most of them you will not find here in America, so I see your point.
I make the best meatballs, and I love them dearly!! You are making me hungry, and it’s only 8 am here!!
Reply
99. My mother’s family is Irish and Nova Scotian. and English. Nova Scotian is my mothers father, but i don’t think the Leary’s
96. My parents were both born in Massachusetts as well. yes
91. I believe that my maternal grandmother has been able to trace her family back to the Mayflower, which is amusing, because the family drinks like Irishmen right off the boat. yup back to John Alden & Pricilla Mullins, through the Wilder’s (your grandmother’s mother’s side)
89. My mother’s family is quite large, and, in fact, she is older than her youngest uncle. As a result, most of the family members who are my age are actually my second cousins. it think it is her brother Kevin who is older than his youngest Uncle. Kevin was born in 1952, Uncle Mark in Dec 1953. So unless your mom’s bday is before 12-23-53 she’s not. But the rest of the statement is right
88. My grandmother’s brothers used to live in a very poor part of Massachusetts and were a bunch of thugs as kids. The Leary’s were a bit of a gang back in the 40s and 50s. more the mid-50′s through the 60′s. The oldest boy was born 1936, the youngest in ’53, so they hit HS starting in 1950 and ending in 1971, eight boys in all. Rollie graduated with George Jung (of “Blow” notoriety) and Paul played football with him, but was a year or so younger
84. While I have never hit on any of my cousins, many of whom are objectively attractive, my brother tried some cheesy pick up lines on my cousin on Myspace. yes he did leave me a comment that could be considered hitting on, but in his defense it started with “so i guess you know my brother adam” clearly indicating he was unaware of the relation. Thanks for referring to me as “objectively attractive” i love compliments
81. I’m not sure, but I may be the first person in my mother’s side of the family with a doctorate.i think so, i don’t think any of the original generation got more than a diploma, and its only the younger of the cousins who have bachelors or masters, Kevin or Leah or Jason being the oldest i think.
can you tell i am in charge of the family tree??
Reply
Angel, I’m not a fan of potatoes unless they’re french fried or mashed, either, and I know that there are things like gnocci that use potatoes.
Jules, thanks for the information. I think my grandfather’s (Howard) family is from Nova Scotia. Weren’t the Leary’s across the street or something from a large Italian family who were also a bunch of hoodlums? My mother is younger than Mark by six months – you’re right about that. I got my BA before Kev and Leah, although Jason is probably before me. You are clearly a highly competent keeper of the family tree!
Reply
Twitter: hismuse
says:
But do you have the Irish curse?
Reply
Did match.com give your brother and sister refunds or did they hook up?
Reply
Italian / Irish, huh?
Then you must know the perfect recipe for (Irish) stew: Get some meat, some potatoes and a lot of Guinness Stout. Drink all of the stout. Forget about the stew.
Too bad you Italians only get one good shave from a disposable razor.
Reply
Twitter: tlkaply
says:
I currently use your name as a bogeyman to frighten small children. But only because I love you, and want you to be happy, you fucker. :lmao:
Reply
I can see why you would hate italian food–its not a cheeseburger.
Reply
I see Julianne is pleased that she was referenced….not so sure that I feel the same…at least it was sean who found me in a search and not the other way around….I had just forgotten about that too….
Reply
Mistress Yoda, what’s that?
Mist1, I think they found their match.
Rockyjay, I can’t even use a disposable razor once – I usually go through two or three blades if I haven’t shaved in a week.
Tracy, awesome! You’re so cool!
TMP, exactly. If it’s not a cheeseburger or a steak, I don’t care.
Meagan, I’m happy to remind you. Anytime.
Reply
Italian Sausage???
mmm..mm..good.
Reply
Twitter: hismuse
says:
Small peepee.
Reply
“he realized how much he needed my mother and came right home to her, smelly and dirty from over six months on the road without a shower or bath.” That is the so romantic! No wonder she married him. Are you as romantic as your father, Avi?
Reply
I’m still confused as to how ANYONE could NOT like italian food. :loser:
Reply
ADW, yes. Italian sausage is good for the ladies. Lots of protein.
Mistress Yoda, isn’t that the “curse” of almost every culture except blacks? Irish, Asian, English, Greek, etc.? The curse must mean that if it’s smaller than 12 inches, it’s small.
Dragon, probably. I can be very sappy.
Amy, ask your husband what else I don’t like that surprised him.
Reply
omg, how can anyone not like italian food! you are CRAZY!
“In fact, his name (Abu Tabela) is used as a bogeyman to children in Pakistan even to this day.”
why does this not surprise me, Dr. Avitable???
Reply
Twitter: hismuse
says:
The Jews don’t really have the curse either.
Reply
Yeah, well, the issue-less wonder is no longer a fitting description. Freak.
Reply
your 100 should really appear in a ‘pop-up’ style dance video.
Reply
Dawn, I just can’t get interested in marinara.
Mistress Yoda, it’s a myth!
Amy, oh, like those are big issues?
Liquid, that is a truly brilliant idea. I might have to do something like that.
Reply
Twitter: hismuse
says:
How would you know?
Reply
Because I love Jewish penis, duh!
Reply
Twitter: hismuse
says:
Well then you’d know better than me, I’ve never had Jewish penis.
Reply
Are you an anti-Semite when it comes to dick?
Reply
Twitter: hismuse
says:
Well i’m not a fan of kosher penis.
Reply
Issues are issues! And you have them my friend.
Reply
Is there such a thing as Irish food? You can’t mean whisky and ale?
Reply
Wait – You hate Italian food? Northern? Southern? All of it? What a waste of a perfectly inspired heritage.
Reply
Mistress Yoda, what is the difference? It’s not prepared on a plate with unclean animals?
Amy, I have issues of Playboy.
Nessa, mainly Irish-American cuisine.
Bossy, I only like meat, cheese, bread, and birthday cake. It’s who I am.
Reply
Twitter: missbritt
says:
“I have issues of Playboy”
Yes, and convince young girls to read those issues of Playboy with you while recording themselves masturbating.
And you see no problem with that.
As long as Amy is out of town.
and THAT my friend, is, officially, an “issue”
:dance:
Reply
Well, you know, once Amy is out of town, I run around in my underwear with sunglasses and socks, sliding around while I host a whorehouse for my friends.
Reply
Twitter: hismuse
says:
It’s not, wow…I’m going to have to rethink this…
Reply
Twitter: whyrustalkingme
says:
Nice list. I married into a big Italian family and I hate the food too. Gimme cheese burgers, fries, and a gigantic Coke and I’m happy!
Reply
I can count to 21.
Did your dad ever shower?
Reply
You know, you sound just like my husband…”I only eat meat, cheese, bread, and ice cream…now leave me alone”. :lmao:
Reply
Mistress Yoda, let me know what you figure out.
Usedtobeme, I knew I liked you for a reason!
Tug, I don’t know if he did while he was hitchhiking. Maybe, but probably very infrequently.
Angel, maybe I AM your husband! :boobs4:
Reply
Your siblings work for you? Wow. You’re a braver man than I thought!!
Reply
You could be…you do look kinda like him, although I’m sure you’re taller. (He’s only 5’6″ tall.) :boobs1: (My hair is blonde).
Reply
I’m sure you like potatoes.
And that true about your dad coming all the way back for your mom?
She must be a super fox.
Reply
Damnit. Why must you inspire me so?
Reply
Pingback: Avitable » 100 Things Part 2
Pingback: Heartless Lass » Tuesday Top 10 (100-91)
Pingback: Avitable » 100 Things Part 3