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Postcard Hell

Postcard Hell is now officially open! Before you go shop your little fingers off, though, please keep the following notes in mind:

  • There may be a few bugs. If something isn't working, please use the contact form at Postcard Hell and let me know.
  • Orders will take about two weeks to ship.
  • To commemorate the opening of my storefront, I created a brand new postcard design that you can only see by visiting Postcard Hell!
  • If you have suggestions for dirty or embarrassing postcards, use the contact form at Postcard Hell to submit them and if I use your idea, you'll get a free 4-pack of that postcard!
  • I'll try to add a new design every couple of weeks. Use the email subscription form at Postcard Hell to get an email every time I add a new design.
  • Don't forget to come back here and leave a comment telling me what you think.

Happy Monday!

If you're new to the horrors of Avitable.com, don't miss out. Subscribe to my RSS feed!


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55 comments

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  1.  

    Heh!

    I have been waiting for this day for sooo long. Well maybe not sooo long. But ... ever since you told us about it!

    I just ordered three multi-packs for brothers' Christmas stocking's

    Comments by bluepaintred

    comment by bluepaintred Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 1:26 am

     

  2.  

    WOOOOOOT! My favorite gameshow!

    I will totally be buying you out of your stock so I can give them as stocking stuffers as I cruise the country meeting bloggers.

    Comments by Poppy

    comment by Poppy Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 1:28 am

     

  3.  

    Go back and edit bullets two and six. You failed to mention your new site, PostcardHell.com

    Comments by Clown

    comment by Clown Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 1:35 am

     

  4.  

    I agree with Clown. Without #2 and #6 mentioning the site, I won't know what I'm supposed to do... finger

    Comments by Sheila

    comment by Sheila Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 1:54 am

     

  5.  

    This may sound stupid... but I want to be able to subscribe to Postcard Hell and have a postcard addressed and sent to me whenever a new one is released. What a cool thing to find stuck in with your mail every once in a while!

    Comments by Dave2

    comment by Dave2 Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 2:19 am

     

  6.  

    Dave, there's an RSS feed at the bottom of the site:

    http://www.postcardhell.com/feed/

    Comments by Poppy

    comment by Poppy Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 2:33 am

     

  7.  

    OMG! I love these postcards! These are going to be soooo much fun to send out. lmao boobs4

    Comments by Geeky Tai-Tai

    comment by Geeky Tai-Tai Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 3:49 am

     

  8.  

    Woot!

    BTW, my postcard (the dirty pictures one) made it to my office and sat in my transparent folder holder beside my door for two weeks while I was on vacation.

    It was a huge success. People kept looking at me in a funny way. The sexual harrassment lady had a little talk with me... ;-)

    Comments by Mike

    comment by Mike Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 6:08 am

     

  9.  

    I was told to stop by here by some flaming red-haired avatar. Nice to see someone else in the blogosphere has a sense of humor– (this comment coming from an expert, a comedienne.)

    Glad I stopped by! I will have to check-in regularly... angel

    Comments by Lucy Dee

    comment by Lucy Dee Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 6:45 am

     

  10.  

    If you submitted something by the Contact Form, it wasn't working. It is now. Sorry.

    BPR, look at you - what an awesome sister!

    Poppy, you'll be like an evil Santa.

    Clown, I wanted to make it very clear that they should use the links at that site, not this site. Because people are retarded, remember?

    Heather, damn straight!

    Sheila, bunch of smart asses, the lot of ya.

    Dave, that is a cool idea. I wonder how I'd work that using Paypal as the merchant.

    Poppy, he means real mail.

    Geeky, only if you define fun by horrifying all of your friends!

    Mike, very nice! Are you prohibited from talking to any minors now?

    Lucy Dee, thanks for the visit. Flaming red-haired avatar? Heartless Lass? Satan? Who?

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 7:12 am

     

  11.  

    I am very excited about this enterprise of yours!

    Comments by Mr. Fabulous

    comment by Mr. Fabulous Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 7:29 am

     

  12.  

    Delicious malicious.

    Comments by RW

    comment by RW Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 7:41 am

     

  13.  

    I'm excited as hell too...My hubby and I have been arguing over which ones to buy, who we are sending them to, and so on...we'll order by Friday at the latest.

    Comments by Angel

    comment by Angel Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 8:15 am

     

  14.  

    crazywife heartbeat

    Avitable, I just love these little smileys! It doesn't take much to make me laff! Here I'm gonna pretend this is me sexytime

    That's hilarious! Any way, I gave you an award just because I wanted to recognize what you did. What you do with it is up to you. I don't care if you accept it or not. I just needed to recognized how benevolent you were recently and how much I admire what you did.
    Here's the post
    http://wackymom.blogspot.com/2007/07/awards-awards-and-more-awards.html

    Comments by Ev Nucci

    comment by Ev Nucci Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 8:51 am

     

  15.  

    I guess I wasn't clear about "the talk". She wants to be in my pictures...

    ;-)

    Comments by Mike

    comment by Mike Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 8:59 am

     

  16.  

    Mr. Fabulous, me too. It should be a blast.

    RW, nefarious hilarious.

    Angel, did you see the new design?

    Ev, thanks for that. I appreciate it, even if it's not true in the slightest.

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 9:00 am

     

  17.  

    Mike, ooh, sounds like fun! Those sexual harassment chicks just need to get laid, you know?

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 9:03 am

     

  18.  

    Nice linkage.

    And I am really sorry that I was not here to talk you back from the child molestor ledge.

    Rest assured, some people will laugh at anything if you tell them to.

    batting

    Comments by Miss Britt

    comment by Miss Britt Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 9:06 am

     

  19.  

    Great, now I have coffee up my nose, on my keyboard, in my screen...

    :-D

    Comments by Mike

    comment by Mike Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 9:06 am

     

  20.  

    Hehe I love the new design...that is one that we are debating on, although we are trying to decide if we know anyone that is our age without children. My brother-in-Law might beat my pretty little face in if I send him that one...and I read your FAQ's where you stated that you will assume no risk. lmao

    I know that we will get a multipack plus some of the other designs, but I am not sure which yet. I do know that I will probably be purchasing more closer to the Christmas season.

    Comments by Angel

    comment by Angel Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 9:14 am

     

  21.  

    I just can't decide who to send them to-but I'll be ordering!

    Comments by metalmom

    comment by metalmom Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 9:26 am

     

  22.  

    Avi, I am not an evil Santa. I'm a *bad* Santa.

    Sorry, Dave. I should have known you're smart. I blame the hour of the night at which I wrote that comment, because I didn't even remember doing it.

    Comments by Poppy

    comment by Poppy Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 9:33 am

     

  23.  

    Proceeds go to Sarcastica's laptop fund!! :D

    I wish.

    Comments by Sarcastica

    comment by Sarcastica Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 10:40 am

     

  24.  

    the Postcard Hell site is great! I hope you get oodles of orders!!!

    Comments by Webmiztris

    comment by Webmiztris Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 10:41 am

     

  25.  

    Brittany of Christ, cranky bitch!

    Mike, destroying computer equipment is always fun!

    Angel, I'm glad someone read the FAQ! Did you also notice the hidden message in the Church name?

    Metalmom, send them to your daughter. At school.

    Poppy, bad and evil!

    Sarcastica, I'll donate for boobies.

    Dawn, you should contribute to the oodles!

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 10:46 am

     

  26.  

    I sure did, motherfucker. lmao

    Comments by Angel

    comment by Angel Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 10:53 am

     

  27.  

    I just call 'em like I see 'em.

    I'm sorry, I'll be better.

    "ooh! i love it! spot on funny Avi! baaa"

    Better?

    Comments by Miss Britt

    comment by Miss Britt Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 10:53 am

     

  28.  

    If you sell 4 packs you'll barely have enough to cover the cost of 1 double cheeseburger.

    That's without fries, tax, or tip.

    $15 cheeseburger...
    WTF.

    Comments by Clown

    comment by Clown Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 10:57 am

     

  29.  

    Absolutely fantastic! I think I might need a multi-pack...

    Comments by Devilish Girl

    comment by Devilish Girl Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 11:09 am

     

  30.  

    Angel, very astute of you.

    SycoBritt, see how good you are at it when you try?

    Clown, I know. Next time, I'll have to go with a normal one.

    DG, I think you need multiple multi-packs!

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 11:21 am

     

  31.  

    I want a store but I don't sell anything dunce

    Comments by Mistress Yoda

    comment by Mistress Yoda Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 11:49 am

     

  32.  

    OMG - the poopy one was my fave until I saw your new Church Apology postcard. Now I gots to figure out who to give 'em to.

    Comments by ADW

    comment by ADW Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 11:57 am

     

  33.  

    This is what popped into my head so I need to say it:

    SUCK IT, SANTA FUCKER!

    I dunno where that came from. angel

    Comments by Poppy

    comment by Poppy Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 12:47 pm

     

  34.  

    boobs1

    Do I get the money now?

    Comments by Sarcastica

    comment by Sarcastica Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 12:49 pm

     

  35.  

    I love it when Britt spanks you publicly. I bet you secretly love it too.

    BTW - excellent site! I'm VERY excited for you.

    Comments by Amy

    comment by Amy Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 1:34 pm

     

  36.  

    Mistress Yoda, you could sell something!

    ADW, you should just send them to your husband anonymously.

    Sarcastica, nice try!

    Amy, she was just being obnoxious and grumpy.

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 1:53 pm

     

  37.  

    What am I going to sell? Pictures of my boobs?

    Comments by Mistress Yoda

    comment by Mistress Yoda Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 1:57 pm

     

  38.  

    I'm with Dave. Bring me an Evil Postcard Of The Month Club, you hairy bastard.

    Comments by Tracy Lynn

    comment by Tracy Lynn Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 3:00 pm

     

  39.  

    My favorite might be the sex change operation reminder. I don't know.

    I will go look again.

    Comments by Lynda

    comment by Lynda Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 3:22 pm

     

  40.  

    I followed a link ( I believe the one in #5) and never came back..... I chuckled at the postcards. I know I better order some STAT!

    Comments by themuttprincess

    comment by themuttprincess Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 3:23 pm

     

  41.  

    I was being obnoxious and grumpy?

    Well helllooooo Kettle. Meet Pot.

    Comments by Miss Britt

    comment by Miss Britt Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 3:53 pm

     

  42.  

    Mistress Yoda, and blowjob lessons.

    Tracy, I might just have to do that!

    Lynda, that is a good one. My favorite is the Rejected Photos one.

    TMP, STAT!

    Britter the Sandman, gasp! I was grumpy? No way!

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 3:57 pm

     

  43.  

    OMG Avi! Postcard Hell totally rocks!!!

    boobs3

    Comments by DutchBitch

    comment by DutchBitch Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 3:58 pm

     

  44.  

    You are a motherfucking comedy genius and an incomparable artist... did you write that yourself?

    Comments by Amanda234

    comment by Amanda234 Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 4:11 pm

     

  45.  

    have i told you lately how proud i am of you for this? it's SUCH a good idea...truly.

    Comments by Crys

    comment by Crys Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 5:16 pm

     

  46.  

    Dutchbitch, yes it does.

    Amanda24, of course I did. I'm a motherfucking comedy genius!

    Crystal, thanks! Now buy some!

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 5:40 pm

     

  47.  

    Woot! Teh awesomeness!

    Comments by Joefish

    comment by Joefish Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 9:21 pm

     

  48.  

    clap thumbsup LOVE the site, I'll be back to buy some...stocking stuffers is an awesome idea!

    Comments by Tug

    comment by Tug Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 9:23 pm

     

  49.  

    Joefish, of course, I forgot to mention that I couldn't have done the site without all of your help. Thanks!

    Tug, they would be funny stocking stuffers, that is true.

    Comments by Avitable

    comment by Avitable Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 9:46 pm

     

  50.  

    Fucking AWESOME. The world owes you for filling the void left by those tight asses at Hallmark.

    I ordered the assorted pack.

    The only one I noticed missing was from the pregnancy test people about the recall of defective sticks. Heh.

    Comments by DangerDoll

    comment by DangerDoll Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 10:12 pm

     

  51.  

    Okay, what are the new postcards for day care, grade school "Emergency Contact" adults?

    Comments by Trish K

    comment by Trish K Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 10:21 pm

     

  52.  

    PS You also are missing a card for women who have had augmentations...and maybe some sort of defect...one boob exploding...I don't know just because my boobs are black from the surgery...sore...still can't sleep on my back...and still no post card from you...sob, cry, whine....where is my wine...oh..sorry wrong site...
    boobs1 (still too sore to do this)

    Comments by Trish K

    comment by Trish K Monday, July 16, 2007 @ 10:24 pm

     

  53.  

    Avitable, I just had time to check out your postcards from hell. I freaking love them....absolutely brilliant! sexytime

    Comments by Ev Nucci

    comment by Ev Nucci Tuesday, July 17, 2007 @ 8:07 am

     

  54.  

    I can only do lessons for people with small mouths.

    Comments by Mistress Yoda

    comment by Mistress Yoda Tuesday, July 17, 2007 @ 8:09 am

     

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