So, I'm working on my huge mondo Halloween party that we're having this year and I'm having trouble with a costume idea. I have two questions:
1. How much nudity is too much nudity?
2. Does anyone have a good costume idea for me?
Also, anyone who wants to come can put Saturday, October 27th on their calendar. It will be well worth the trip.
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I didn't think there was a thing called too much nudity
Comments by Amanda
Get yourself a giant fig leaf. 'Nuf said.
Hmmm...
Wear a toga and tell everyone you are an aging frat boy.
Comments by Amy
I suck at coming up with ideas for costumes.
Nudity is always good.
Put an empty Coca Cola carton on your head and go as a cokehead.
Yeah - it does suck. Anyway, you only do the lime thing. Or, you could be a limey cokehead! Do you do cans or 2 liters?
Yes - it's very late here. Me no comment when me tired no more.
Comments by Sybil Law
OK my first thought was you could get some black granny panty speedo thing and a matching black sports bra with a fedora and go as Brittany spears at that Music Awards thing. Then I thought if you want to go all nude, paint yourself gold and go AS the award!
Get a nappy blonde wig, cheap red lipstick and an empty bottle of booze and go as your favorite co-worker. Make a suit out of that crinkly paper they use on bulletin boards and go as one of Mr. Fads sculpties. Traditional looks would include a tail, horns and a devil's fork that was shaped like a "$" and you would be Vice President Cheney.
OK OK OK I am thinking of a character you can create from scratch. You make the costume to fit the name... Richard Balldinger. But his friends call him Dick.
Maybe I should think about on this a bit more.
Comments by Y2K Survivor
two words - assless chaps .
Comments by ygraine
I don't mind nudity as long as the hairy parts are covered... so maybe you should be a ghost?
Comments by Sheila
Yeah the Britney thing is cute, but I don't think you could even bang enough chicks to reclaim your manhood
Comments by topncal
I am having a lot of trouble with a costume idea as well.
A lot of people think I should go as you, and while I think it would be easy to pull off cosmetically, I think I would have trouble projecting THAT much disdain and contempt for most people...
Comments by Mr. Fabulous
So, here's my take on nudity.
It's completely subjective. You can take off as many pieces of clothes as everyone else in the room can stand, without everyone starting to puke.
For example, I have a policy. I NEVER show my legs or upper arms. Jiggle and cellulite (read REALLY FAT) is never a good thing. Personally, I hate cleaning up puke, and the screams of horror are too much to handle, so I err on the side of caution.
If I looked like Pam Anderson, I would walk around naked all the time, flaunting my fab body. Hell, I would probably touch myself all the time. More than I do now.
As for your costume, I really like the ass-less chaps idea. Maybe you could throw in one of those netted tanks from the 80's, in a half-shirt fashion, and gel up your hair.
Your wife can wear a half-shirt and a micro-mini made of denim or white leather, and wear those crinkly boots we all wore to Bon Jovi and Whitesnake concerts. But she has to make sure and tease her bangs up really high, and use Rave Hairspray #3. She will know exactly what I am talking about. If she doesn't, she is either three years old, or she has been under a rock, or she grew up in the midwest.
So, you invited everyone to your party, but who the hell knows where you fricken' live? I mean, if I am going to use my airline points to crash your party, I need a destination... :-) Nah, I wouldn't do that to you. You aren't that important.
Yet.
The Absurdist
Comments by The Absurdist
1. Yours
2. Paris Hilton
3. I can't travel on the 27th because I'm probably going to have a Brittle Bones Day.
Comments by RW
Shorts–nothing else-when asked, you can answer "you came in your pants"
Comments by metalmom
Not sure about you, but Bossy is so going to a Halloween party as Dancing Avitable.
Comments by BOSSY
Gawd. i totally had my heart set on going to your party but SOMEONE is absolutely making me babysit. What the hell?!
Comments by DeannaBanana
Either a Doodlebop or a Boohbah.
Comments by Wayne
Y2K - what the hell man? I don't have NAPPY hair! I spend a lot of fucking money on product shit to make sure of it!
And, Mr. Avitable, you already know what I think you should go as. I'll even let you borrow Devin's bike helmet.
Comments by Miss Britt
You could always just shave your beard, no one would recognize you.
Comments by Trish
I think you should just go naked and be done with it. When someone asks what you are...look at them like they are an idiot, and say "Naked!"
Comments by Angel
I hate being late to the game because I'm too lazy to read all the comments but I'm sure my answer is not unique.
1. NEVER enough nudity. I would walk around naked all the time if it wouldn't get me fired. The backyard of my home is very happy about my decision to rarely wear clothing.
2. You should wear a naked suit.
Comments by Poppy
never enough nudity. never!
personally i think you should go as a pull toy. just get naked and strap on some roller skates. the wife should so as a little girl. then she can pull you around the party...
Comments by hellohahanarf
What do you mean "Too Much Nudity"? There is no such thing as too much nudity! Sheesh!
Ehm... costume... Well, in relation to the above : how about you borrow the Avitable Hairy Butt Plug from me and just wear that?
Comments by DutchBitch
GO naked. Tell 'em your either A) A gorilla or B) Angels Idea.
Comments by Fogspinner
http://cgi.ebay.com/LONG-SCHLONG-G-STRING-UNDERWEAR-COSTUME-MEN-SEXY-UNDIES_W0QQitemZ230171644502QQihZ013QQcategoryZ19255QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem
DO IT.
:)
Comments by Webmiztris
I suck at ideas, but do like the assless chaps or Brit ideas.
Comments by Tug
You can be Lady Godiva. You just need to get a flesh colored body suit, and a long blond wig. That way you can be “naked” with out anyone actually loosing their lunch. Or their eyesight.
Comments by Crazy Lady in Vegas
OK OK OK I got it! The absolute perfect consume that blends nudity and whimsy. Get some duct tape and paint it flesh color and tape your junk (like it's tucked) and go as a Ken doll found in any kid's toy chest(or any other action figure you can prefer.) Bonus is if you can get Britt or Amy to go naked as a Barbie.
p.s. I just watched Britt's old video of why she should never drink. How would you describe her hair? Full and curly? Oh! I mean... why does Britt assume SHE is your favorite employee??? I mean, you work there too and I ask you, is it really impossible to be a humble narcissist?
Comments by cris
OK, what the hell?!?! This is pick on Britt day?
fuckyouguys, I'm going home
Comments by Miss Britt
Want I should kick someone's ass Britt?
I need to make a "Leave Britt ALONE!" video...
Comments by Amy
I love South Park references!
And I love the Lady Godiva idea... I can see you now, walking around the party in long flowing (not nappy hair) with a child's stick horse glued across your ass.
Comments by cris
For YOU? Since you're built like my husband? I would say ANY nudity between the neck and ankles is probably WAY too much.
I like ALL the ideas people have given here, but especially "Britney". In addition, you could just attach CHEAP extensions to the end of the hair you aleady have - perfect Britney hair!
Comments by annie
Amanda, can I send you some photos?
Amy, I could put puke down the front and have some GHB for date raping with me, too!
Sybil, I hope you got some sleep. I think you needed it!
Y2K, that Britney idea isn't too bad.
Ygraine, that's actually under consideration.
Sheila, is it really nudity if the hairy parts are covered?
Topncal, but being Britney is a lifelong dream!
Mr. Fabulous, oh, I don't know. I have faith in you.
Absurdist, I live in Orlando. I'll be giving details as the party gets closer. And yes. I am that fucking important!
RW, 1. That's not what you said last night.
2. I'd have to go around giving oral sex to everyone
3. Liar.
Metalmom, BWAHAHAH! Brilliant!
Bossy, contact my reps for licensing rights.
DeannaBanana, really? What a twat! I'd like you to come, too. Maybe your husband and son can babysit instead.
Wayne, you horrify me.
Britt, that idea is still under consideration.
Trish, this is true. I could go as Mr. Fab if I did that.
Angel, hahahahahah! That's an awesome idea too!
Poppy, why a naked suit? Why not just naked?
Hello, wow, that's really creepy sounding.
DB, then I'd just have to bend over every time to show off my costume.
Fogspinner, Angel is briliant, isn't she?
Dawn, I'm seriously thinking about it.
Tug, the only problem with the Britt idea is that not everyone at the party will know who that is.
Crazy Lady, ooh, that is a good idea.
Cris, I'd be the largest, hairiest Ken doll the world has ever seen.
Britt, don't go home. We need sales first!
Amy, you should do that!
Annie, I am definitely built like your husband. That's why the nudity would be awesome!
Comments by Avitable
I say you go as a flasher!
All you need is a bathrobe. some flesh colored underwear and a pair of pantie hoes stuffed to be really long... ;) you get what I mean!
Take the Pantie hoes and stuff them to make them look like a really long Penis.. take the newly stuffed unit and sew them to the Flesh colored underwear place the underwear on then roll your new extreemly long penis up. Put on the robe and.....Any time some one new walks in to your party you flash them letting your unit unroll at them!
In the 70's and 80's my really young parents used to hold huge Halloween parties and I remember walking out of my bedroom one time when my dad (dressed as a flasher) flashed a friend! lol
It was a great costume even then....
Comments by Gemini
Why don't you put on a blonde wig and an orange jump suit and go as Paris Hilton behind bars.
Comments by Dragon
Because naked isn't a costume. Duh.
Comments by Poppy
1. That wasn't me, I have brown hair,
2. Suddenly this is difficult?
3. So?
Comments by RW
Gemini, that is a good idea!
Dragon, it just seems so derivative, I don't know.
Poppy, sure it is! I'll wear a fake moustache, too.
RW, 1. I only saw you from behind.
2. My jaw is sore.
3. You should make the trip down here!
Comments by Avitable
So, you actually are going as Ron Jeremy. Perv. ;)
Comments by Poppy
Flash your vagina once in awhile...they'll know.
(Britt DOES still have your balls, right?)
Comments by Tug
With your beard, you can go as Paris in jail and she has had no electrolysis for a month.
Comments by Dragon
How about Ron Jeremy?
Comments by Robin
I like Amy's Idea...the leaf thing...that would be perfect! Oh! and how long of a drive is it from here to there? I wanna come!!
Comments by Janelle
I liked your Steve Irwin costume last year...but I think you should be Britney Spears...after all, you can just lounge around with the blow-up doll expression on your face...only more apathetic...and not have to exert yourself for the pictures (which I'm sure you'll have plenty of again).
Comments by Danalyn
Poppy, I wish I was Ron Jeremy!
Tug, yes, she does.
Dragon, hah! Nice one.
Robin, he's come up a few times now.
Janelle, I think it's a pretty long trek.
Danalyn, but I'll have to flash my vagina!
Comments by Avitable
I kind of figured...what does that say?
Comments by Robin