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Do you know what’s more fun than spending all night working on trying to fix your new computer only to find out that the mobo or processor is probably fucked?

1. Getting your eyeball scratched by a paperclip.
2. Sneezing and involuntarily kneeing yourself in the face.
3. Popping an anal fissure.
4. Having sex with a broken bottle full of alcohol.


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30 Replies to “Funnest”

  1. Girl, Dislocated

    I never waste my time spending all night trying to fix a computer. I go straight for the more fun activities:
    #1, with objects other than paperclips, and several variations of #2, including one instance exactly as you described it. I’d have a hard time deciding if my only choices were #3, #4, and the broken computer though.


  2. Heather

    Fucking ‘puters. Bane of society. I know something worse! I know! I know! Weaning your 6-month old, which causes extremely engorged, in-pain hooters, and your 2-year-old knees you in the chest while playing. Yep, that’s worse.

  3. turnbaby


    I feel your pain as I fought with my 5 year old laptop. It keeps telling me it’s got a ‘run time error’ and just shuts the fuck down.

    I think I can fix the run time error–it’s run time with me is just about over.

    I’m hauling my lazy geek self to get me a new Macbook today.

  4. Avitable

    Dave, no?

    Girl, Dislocated, I think I’ll do all of them simultaneously.

    CP, alcohol is always involved when it comes to sex with you, isn’t it?

    RW, what about funstacular?

    Todd, this was my fault, actually. I improperly installed it originally.

    Countess, ooh, that’s fun, too.

    Metalmom, me too.

    Heather, that sounds like a blast!

    Britt, mofo.

    Geeky, I did. I knew I shouldn’t have.

    TMP, here’s hoping. It’s not looking up, though.

    Mom, motherboard.

    Amanda, yup.

    Turnbaby, I’m on a laptop now. And I hate laptops!

    Poppy, maybe YOU should!

    Robin, good. Can we switch places?

    Tracy, bad people deserve nice things too!

  5. Sybil Law

    Well you’ve got gross things more fun to do cornered!
    Once I had something in my eye for DAYS. Finally I got it out, and it ended up being this looong, skinny string with a teensy feather on it. I wanted to vomit just looking at it. How the hell did it stay there for days?! Now THAT was fun. And gross.
    Good luck with your mofo mobo.

  6. Kylah

    I don’t know why you dislike laptops, I love them. Did you see that? I just picked up my laptop waved it around and said “Wheeeeeeeeeee!” 2 is probably the best option for me since I’m klutzy and accidentally hit myself in the face a lot, so I’m used to it.

  7. Wayne

    (said a la Chris Farley from SNL)

    so, uh, hey, remember when, um, yeah, remember back in The Office? When they were doing the insurance coverage thing? Yeah? Well, um, hey, um, ‘member when Dwight spoke out loud a list of medical issues that he thought were “fake”? and ‘member that time when “Anal Fissures” was one of the ones he listed? And Kevin said they were real? ‘member that? You do? that was cool.

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