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I . . .

I don’t know how people type on laptops. The keyboards suck, the edge of the laptop digs into your wrists in what I have to assume is a carpal tunnel syndrome inducing angle, and the fucking touchpad doesn’t allow you any of the versatility of a mouse. I’ll be able to go back to my computer after this, thank God!

I have fallen behind in my writing, which annoys me to no end. I need to take a day or two and knock out 3-4,000 words so that I can catch up. I’m still committed to getting to 50,000 words by the end of the month. And barring anymore computer problems, I think I’ll get there.

I would like to send a big “fuck you” to EA Games for ruining the Simpsons game for the Wii. The voice acting is awesome, and all of the lines of dialogue are great, but for some reason, when it came to the Wii, they shortened it from 8,000 to 6,000 lines, and they got rid of the feature that would let you run around the town of Springfield. Add in the shitty controls and horrible camera angles, and this game is only one for the diehard fan who wants cool animation and cut scenes, along with some clever Simpsons quotables.

I have no Diet Coke in my house. This is a tragedy of untold proportions. I will provide ample bounty to anyone who brings me some tomorrow morning.

I hate my DVR, which decided not to record “Pushing Daisies” tonight because of an “unscheduled recording conflict”, which translates to “piece of shit computer in the DVR decided that it didn’t feel like following its programming for no reason.” I hate Brighthouse for releasing this new DVR, and I hate the people who created its software. You should all die a horrible death with lots of pain. Please.

I know that Thursday is going to be a pain in the ass day. I hate when I can anticipate the shittiness.

I am going to bed. Here is a photo of my birthday three years ago (edit: No, it’s not my birthday – that’s not until January 26th. I just thought this was a funny picture.)

Adam_27th_Birthday-01

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40 Replies to “I . . .”

  1. Girl, Dislocated

    You’ll have diet coke in time to help you through Thursday’s shitiness, won’t you?

    I’d like to send some big “fuck you”s to certain organizations at the moment too, but it will have to wait until normal business hours.

    I love typing on a laptop. I can type from bed if necessary, so I don’t have to wait until I can safely be vertical to do stuff on my computer–though it doesn’t guarantee my brain will cooperate. That said, I tried to proof read this. The words are in English. Good enough.

    Lots of luck thursday.

  2. RW

    For a brief moment you rose in my estimation innumerable degrees. When I saw the reference to EA Games I thought – Football! Only to have my opinion dashed upon the rocks and shoals of the horrid realization that, no, it wasn’t that kind of game you were talking about. Alas.

    But, so this post is not a total loss, there are about 10 or 12 words that can be easily edited out. Let this serve as an object lesson in pumping up the number of words uselessly, to ease the strain as you catch up to your goal.

  3. Clown

    The Simpsons game really was a shame. I’m still interested in playing it a bit more to get some more audio and animations but it seems kind of messed up they let the game be released with so many problems.

    BTW… What went under the Happy Birthday sign? Birthday pizza or birthday cake?

  4. Kylah

    Sadly I have never been to Chuck E. Cheese. I had a very deprived childhood. I only got to go to Funtime USA, and my mother would steal my tokens so she could play Pacman and air hockey. I hope today is better than the last few days have been for you.

  5. Wayne

    As IT Director for a company with ~500 employees, many of whom have laptops, and my group has to support them, we HIGHLY encourage all our lappy users to have a dock with external keyboard and mouse for most of their laptop time. When they’re at home or at work, they should NOT use the laptop keyboard. They don’t last. The laugh at you, so you pound it harder and it just breaks the hard drive. Static gets caught under the trackpad/mouse and it causes the mouse to drift.

    And dell makes these really nifty cool “D/View” stations that actually just lift an open laptop up 45 degrees or so which makes the laptop screen your actual monitor and lifts it up eye-level. For those of us who are addicted to dual-displays, it can act as one of them.

    SAVE YOUR LAPTOP KEYBOARD. ONLY USE IT WHEN TRULY MOBILE.

  6. Turnbaby

    One of the advantages of having small hands is being able to type on a laptop. Besides the new MacBook Pro is all silky velvety feeling Purrrrrr

    LMAO@ Britt’s Mom–that’s exactly what I thought!!

    and Metalmom–YOU RULE!!! :sexytime:

  7. Amy

    Oooo, you too? I HATE laptops. They make my wrists hurt and I hate their wannabe mouse thingies because heterosexual women aren’t into fingering ANYTHING.

    Maybe we agree because we share the same birthday, hmmmm? I’m so glad you are older than I am though.

    :poke:

  8. MyWeeWorld

    Since you’re out of Diet Coke, why not try Diet Big Red? That’s my favorite. I worry that they’ll quit making it because I’m the only person who drinks it, so I have to try to convert people.

    My DVR pulled that shit last week with “Heroes”. Urgh! It didn’t even give a reason. It just didn’t do it.

    My brother-in-law is a game tester for EA (tho they call it QA, but whatever, he plays games for a living). You should hear him when he gets going about bad games!

    This is random, but it needs to be said: The girls in your smilies have enormous boobs! I’m totally jealous.

  9. Trish

    Wow…you aren’t having much luck with electronics these days are you?

    Here :boobs2: hope your Thursday isn’t quite as bad as you thought it was going to be.

    Like Britt’s mom said “take a nap”

  10. liquid

    your new dvr does sucketh ass.
    15+ minute reboot time is ricockulous.

    (although the idea of running around
    a candyland and eating everything still
    pleases me)the simpsons game also looked terrible! did you figure out if it was
    supposed to be so pixelated?

    on the bright side, now your computer is working and all lush n’ tidy inside!

    (…and anointed with blood)

  11. Sybil Law

    Well, if it’s any consolation, I think you look better now than you did 3 years ago. Really.
    I freaking HATE laptops. Mine crapped out a while ago and I was actually happy to see it go! It meant I got an actual desktop computer again, which obviously made me super happy. I need room.
    Besides – the weekend is almost here. 🙂

  12. Y2K Survivor

    Seems like if Britt was REALLY all heart broken from seeing you so sad…. she would show you her boobs.

    I figure if Amy has Britt’s back on dating strange Internet groups, I should have yours over seeing her boobs. But seriously…. take pics …and none of that cheap ass cell phone camera crap either. ….on second thought, ask Mrs. Avitable to take the pics. You aint had too good of luck with the ‘lectronics lately.

  13. Stephanie

    Laptops are really not so bad. I used to just have a PC and reguarly keyboard, and then when I married my husband he only had a laptop, and now whenever I use a regular keyboard, I get all fucked up and confused.

    I think that was a terrible sentence, structurally. Oohh well.

  14. Avitable

    BPR, nope – I just thought it was a funny picture.

    Amanda, I hope I receive a horde of baked goods!

    Sheila, I’ll watch it online, but it’s not quite the same.

    Dave, if you’re in Orlando near your next birthday, I will throw you one.

    Girl, Dislocated, I went and got some Diet Coke at 6 AM.

    Mr. Fabulous, is it the gray?

    Heather, the world did. For a week.

    Bec, just watch out for the bees.

    Robin, don’t you have a DVR?

    RW, I don’t mind playing sports video games – at least then, I’m not living vicariously through someone else.

    Britt, you did a nice job of making the week better, though. Thanks.

    Christie, thanks!

    Clown, they didn’t put anything under the sign. The pizza and cake went on the table.

    Poppy, um. Okay?

    Kylah, you were deprived!

    Mom, sleep does make things better, doesn’t it?

    Metalmom, awww, so sweet.

    Hilly, I know!

    Wayne, even with a dock, it’s still a pain in the ass. It’s not as fast as my real computer, and all of my saved information isn’t on there.

    NYCWD, yeah, but the Skee Ball is awesome.

    Turnbaby, Macs are for weirdos and nerds.

    Heather, PCs are much, much better.

    Amy, I’m not older!!!

    MyWeeWorld, I don’t even know what Big Red is.

    Tracy, sometimes it’s nice to whine.

    Trish, my electronic woes may be at an end.

    Liquid, unholy computer will work or we’ll all be damned.

    Crystal, I’ll thank you in two months and nine days.

    HG5, only? That’s ancient!

    Sybil, look better? I don’t know about that.

    Tug, yes, hopefully!

    Y2K, she shows her boobs all the time. Every few hours.

    Luin, I’m the tallest little person in the world.

    Clown, don’t confuse me with my penis.

    Stephanie, I like regular keyboards much better.

  15. Sarcastica

    I love my laptop. It’s awesome. I do have a wireless mouse though, because I agree that mouse pads suck. I dislike touching pads. Hmmm. I meant that. I dislike pads.

    Anyways, thats a super awesome picture. I’d probably adore it if I wasn’t replaced as your favourite blogger. :crazywife:

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