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A Man to Hug and Kiss

I know that I’ve talked before about how this blogger and that blogger were my favorite blogger of all time, but it was all lies. Lies, I tell ya!

My new favorite blogger is Amanda from “Amanda in Real Life”. Not only is she a young, smart, hot, snarky blogger, but she made me cookies! So she now has the distinction of being Avitable’s Favorite Blogger For Life (or until someone else sends me something).

In her package, she enclosed a letter. The photo I took didn’t come out, so I decided to transcribe it instead. Her handwriting was a bit hard to read, so I had to guess what some of it said. As far as I can tell, this is what it read:

Oh Dearest Wonderful Holy Avitable,
In recognition of Your awesomeness and hot gorilla ass, I have enclosed but a small token of my allegiance to Your amazing grace and wondrousness. Would that I could bare my breasts for Your eyes to gaze upon. Alas, I am only close to You in spirit, not in proximity. May You eat of these cookies and think of my nipples forever and ever. Amen.

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39 Replies to “A Man to Hug and Kiss”

  1. Sheila

    Wow, not that the cookies weren’t worth a blog post… but this was impressively time consuming for a batch of cookies. You must have absolutely nothing going on in your life right now. :heartbeat: :heartbeat:

  2. Mr. Fabulous

    Your infatuation with Amanda will only last until the package from Mrs. Fab arrives. It should be there by tomorrow.

    Her chocolate chip cookies are like crack.

    And unlike Amanda, I think Mrs. Fab would totally show you her boobs. I have given her permission.

  3. Mr. Fabulous

    Amanda–Because you said in your letter you couldn’t because you choose to live in TwiddleYourBallSack, Missouri (I am paraphrasing).

    I will be happy to recind my comment upon receipt of pictorial evidence to the contrary.

  4. Avitable

    Amanda, oh, that’s good. I’m glad I didn’t misread your handwriting. Oh, and THANKS!

    Girl, Dislocated, yeah, I decided not to post that picture.

    Sheila, I work hard to satisfy my readers. And cookies trump anything else – life, death, vaginas . . .

    Dan, ooh, good thinking. I might have an extra car just laying around I could send you.

    Mr. Fabulous, I look forward to the crack cookies!

    Crystal, I post my address all the time, and I’ll set a plate for you on Thursday.

    Trish, it’s just added ingredients.

    Britt, that’s it? No snarky comment? Who are you and what have you done with Britt?

    Heather, my allegiance is very easily bought! Mainly by boobs and chocolate.

    RW, you only got ONE cookie!

    Poppy, why’d you have to go and ruin everything?

    ADW, ooh, I can’t wait!

    Metalmom, she might, but only if you’re as awesome as I am.

    Bobgirrl, that would be FANTASTIC.

    Nina, what if I hold my breath until it arrives?

    Amanda, I do think you should prove him wrong. Email me.

    Hello, sweet!

  5. Amy

    I wanted to be snarky… something like, “clearly, Amanda is a suck up.”

    But, the holiday spirit just has me in tooooo great a mood. Or, it’s the cold meds.

    It might be the cold meds.

    :boobs4:

  6. Gwen

    So that’s all a girl has to do to get your lovin’? Make cookies? Well shit! I gotta get on that. (And apparently all you have to do to get lots of womens to send you cookies is to tell them that you love someone more than them because they sent you cookies. Women-folk are crazy competitive.)

  7. Avitable

    Sarcastica, silly Canadian, it’s “favorite”. You’re my favorite 18-year old Canadian blogger.

    HG5, it takes many years of manipulation, plus baking.

    Peggy, ew!

    RaeJane, looking at it makes me hungry – maybe you’re just weird?

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