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Excruciating

Did you know that there is someone out there who made an instantaneous snap judgment, without any actual knowledge or forethought, that Britt and I have an inappropriate, hypersexual, alcohol-saturated other “friendship” that disrespects our spouses? Apparently, this mental midget thinks that which she fantasizes about when she masturbates is actually reality. Sorry to burst your bubble, but Britt was able to come up with 10 whole things that she doesn’t think are awesome about me, and I had a really difficult time coming up with 10 things that were awesome about her. Such a hard time, in fact, that a quick video idea ended up being over 30 minutes long, and I had to edit out tons of it just to make it under 10 minutes! I also cut out all the parts where we performed sexual acts on each other and disparaged our significant others. Oh, and the part where she pooped in a cup and then I ate it and puked in the cup, and then she ate it.

Here is the link to Youtube if you can’t see it embedded.

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50 Replies to “Excruciating”

  1. Mary

    You and Miss Britt ROCK!!! Please do not have an inappropriate, hypersexual, alcohol-saturated other “friendship” that disrespects your spouses, they’re both too hot, and you guys crack me up.

  2. Avitable

    Poppy, our original goal was to do one a week, but that failed miserably.

    Angel, that was a perfect imitation, too.

    Clown, whatever. You jerked off to the whole thing.

    Mary, luckily, in the real world, not in someone’s imagination, we’re just very good friends.

    RW, I shit my keyboard while making it, too!

    Peggy, I’m making that face right now.

    Dee, you should see the “O” face.

    Denise, well, the girl does love shoes.

  3. Miss Britt

    I think he meant I’m saturated enough for the both of us.

    And while I may be a physical midget (although not technically or legally), I am certainly not a mental midget.

    But, yes, saturated physical midget does = flammable.

  4. Nina

    I have never doubted your devotion to and reverance for Mrs. A. Avitable. Video evidence of affection between you and Mrs. Miss Britt notwithstanding, I have no idea why anyone would accuse you of a hypersexual drunken whatever with Mrs. Miss Britt. That’s just not nice.

  5. Lin

    I’ll be needing your legal help if you’re able to tear yourself away from this horrid, homewrecking affair you and Miss Britt are having… refer to my Blog if you have a moment. :sex003:

  6. hellohahanarf

    oh my fuck was this video excellent. even my german shepherd puppy came running over to look at the laptop to see what i was doing that made me laugh so loud. every time britt cracked up louie would tilt his head and get a little closer to the screen. quickly i could see nothing but his held tilting from one side to the other. finally i threw the dogs outside so that i could actually see the video.

    “special is special” will be used frequently this week. thanks for that little gem.

    adam, i almost fell off of the couch at you cracking yourself up. and that strokin it face was a riot! we eagerly await the o face video.

    :clap:

  7. Amy

    This is probably one of my favorite videos ever. Except the one where Britt sang Happy Birthday to us… that was awesome.

    At least now I completely understand what she meant by “dog collar” the other day.

    Don’t you watch when they are doing this stuff to you?

  8. Y2K Survivor

    You know when I first skimmed this post, I thought you said you guys were alcohol sugared, which as I am sure you know, works as a powerful laxative. So I was assuming it really might have been you two and a cup and I did not watch!

    Also, I can’t get DSL at home so I will have to wait til I am back on the the old State payroll to watch it. During my lunch hour, of course.

  9. HoosierGirl5

    That was really funny. I am so jealous. You two seem to be really good friends, which is hard to find in this world. I also think Britt and I would be great friends….want to come to Indiana for a visit, Britt? Or maybe I should come down there and visit both of you? Any problem with me bringing some or all of the kids, Adam?

    Great post.
    J.

  10. Avitable

    Liquid, the mental midget in question doesn’t drink. She’s probably flammable anyways, though.

    Britt, and yes, you are a physical midget.

    Nina, some people are just jealous, I guess.

    Robin, no you wouldn’t be. We’re much cuter.

    Beth, try to use it during sex at least three times for me.

    Lin, ooh, you’re in legal trouble!

    Preposterous, I’m just glad my onanistic expressions can bring such joy to people.

    Dave, I was totally naked from the waist down.

    Hello, so, you’re saying that Britt’s laugh attracts German Shepherds?

    Sybil, well, the sex and the pooping were all mixed into one.

    Mr. Fabulous, even though she’s wrong?

    Bec, what the hell is lemon squash?

    Lin, more like salted nuts.

    Amy, you can’t really watch when they’re shaving your face. They put hot towels over your eyes, and you’re lying down.

    Bethie, you’re supposed to say “Who’s your drunken gutter slut, bitch?”

    Y2K, you’re on dialup at home? Dear God man!

    HG5, my house is a kid-free zone. They can float in the pool, but that’s about it.

  11. hellohahanarf

    holyhell was that funny! loved it.
    you do a pretty good britt imitation, ya know.
    you were really convincing.
    me thinks YOU fucked a dog when you were younger.

  12. Bec

    It’s lemony in a no-added-sugar-but-my-God-it’s-sweet way and it reminds me of summer (cricket on the green, Wimbledon dahling, tea on the lawn type summer) which is no bad thing when the weather is as pissy as it is right now!

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