This week, I received a package from one of my favorite Canadian bloggers, Gwen from "Kill the body and the head will die". In her enclosed letter, she said that she thought I might enjoy this different type of Turkish Delight. Crazy Canadian!
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Ir might not smell like poop, but slap a hat on it and you have a dead ringer for mr. hankey
Comments by Amanda
In the UK it is more square, less poop looking, but much the same otherwise, yum.
Comments by Michael
Mmmm Mmmm good!
Comments by Aargh
mmmmpoop.
Comments by Beth
I saw the fear. Should've stopped reading right there.
I don't know who's a bigger idiot... oh yeah, I do.
Comments by Mary
Yay! It got there okay! And I'm the favourite! (You forgot to mention that I sent you other, far more awesome chocolate to make up for the Big Turk. Because I'm a fucking sweetheart.) How was the curly wurly by the way?
Comments by Gwen
You need to hire an assistant to taste this shit for your first.
How is that smiley a cock? Does your cock look like that because none that I've seen do. I'm a little scared now.
Don't answer that.
Comments by Peggy
ooh...How about a favourite Swedish treat? lol I will get that out to you when I get my
Gilmore boxsetmoney for school.Comments by DaDuck
I love that this has turned into "Send Adam random weird shit and watch him eat it"!
Comments by Gwen
Adam, nice job finding a map of Canada in French!
Gwen, hurry! Send him some Poutine, and he'll be yours forever! :)
Comments by Aunt Robin
She sends you stuff? All I get from Gwen is offers to fuck me.
Comments by Mr. Fabulous
I think the chocolate would balance out the jelly stuff.
Guess not.
Comments by NYCWD
fuckers. those manufacturers are screwing with my childhood image of turkish delight. make them stop!
i think i am now scarred.
Comments by hellohahanarf
hey, my little canadian gnome showed up here! (yay, jester, for setting my ass straight!!) guillermo keeps me from drinking alone on my back porch. now he can keep me company on your blog.
damn, i have issues.
Comments by hellohahanarf
This is going to be fun. To see all the strange things you get now to taste.
Comments by Trish
Hm. Even my presents are cooler than yours.
Comments by Miss Britt
"Turkish Delight" my ass. Now if it were some code name like a "Happy Ending", it would be different. I say we kill the fuckers for false advertising.
Comments by Luaren
The only thing I can say is...ewwwww.
Ewwwww.
Chocolate...with jelly?
Ewwwww.
Comments by Lisa
You were brave. Too bad it was nasty.
Comments by themuttprincess
Amanda, I know!
Michael, yum?
Aargh, mmm mmm blargh.
Beth, exactly.
Mary, well, it ain't me!
Gwen, that's true. You did send other candy. The Curly Wurly was okay. The Creamy Fudge was my favorite, probably.
Peggy, only when I put sunglasses on it.
DaDuck, is Swedish food actually edible?
Gwen, maybe we should make that a regular feature.
Robin, it's from 1845, too.
Mr. Fabulous, clearly, I'm the favored one.
NYCWD, no it just hides it until one shattering moment.
Hello, I like your new avatar.
Trish, yeah, this could be a good feature!
Britt, no they're not. Except the one I got you.
Luaren, apparently, it is a code name. For crappy food!
Lisa, not just jelly. Thick, unpalatable jelly!
TMP, I took one for the team.
Comments by Avitable
yes, yes it is. You may not like what I send...*evil mastermind grin* but it is edible.
Comments by DaDuck
btw, are allergic to anything?
Comments by DaDuck
That is creepy, I don't like stuff hidden in my candy.
Comments by Robin
ew. poop with jelly in it. EW.
Comments by Crys
DaDuck, no allergies, nope!
Robin, not even razor blades? Those are my favorite.
Crystal, yet it sounds so appetizing!
Comments by Avitable
If it looks like a duck, quacks like a duck, and smells like a duck.... just 'cause it's coated in chocolate doesn't mean it won't taste like shit! :-)
Some lessons are just harder to learn that others.
Comments by Coal Miner's Granddaughter
coal miner's granddaughter owes me a new keyboard! HILL-arious.
Comments by hellohahanarf
Gladly! To what address to I send this keyboard? Hee hee!
Comments by Coal Miner's Granddaughter
I always wondered what Turkish Delight is.
Now I know. Slice a turd in half. Note the contents of your turd. Compare to Turkish Delight.
Comments by The Absurdist
Well ok, those are fun but only for special occasions.
Comments by Robin
Wow. So I guess you can't cover everything in chocolate and make the nasty go away.
Strange. That was a fantasy I held for years and years and years... and years...
Comments by Amy
Did you just call yourself a big Turk? *giggle*
Comments by Poppy
HA! So you are not completely politically aligned with the Kurds in your opposition to Turkey.
Comments by Jay
Dude, there is now way that you're only 30? Come on tell the truth, 35? 37?
Comments by Kris
Cranberry jelly?
Comments by Lynda
Your map is from when Texas was an independent country.
Comments by RW
So I like Turkish Delight!
Maybe I should send you a can of Spotted Dick to try.
Comments by Michael
CMG, I'll still try it, especially if it's coated in chocolate.
Hello, you should know better than to drink anything while reading my blog and the subsequent comments.
Absurdist, exactly!
Robin, like church bake-offs and stuff.
Amy, me too!
Poppy, I did? How?
Jay, kurds or turds?
Kris, well, my balls look 37, but that's mainly because of the wrinkles. Yeah, I'm fucking 30.
Lynda, no, it's this jelly-like substance that tastes like old playdoh.
Comments by Avitable
AWESOME! I always said we should secede again!
The Absurdist, Dallas, TX
And proud to be a native Texan...
Comments by The Absurdist
Post title: BIG TURK.
Comments by Poppy
RW, yeah, it's from 1845.
Michael, I've heard that's horrible!
Absurdist, please do - the rest of us don't want Texas either!
Poppy, that's the name of the candy.
Comments by Avitable
Do you think I'm a retard?
I was making a joke.
Comments by Poppy
I think you've been hitting the cold medicine a bit too much!
Comments by Avitable
I think you just don't "get" me. I have absolutely no cold meds in my bod.
Comments by Poppy
Ha! Rarely do I laugh out loud at people's posts, but you got me, Adam. I had to share it with a coworker even.
I've never tried Turkish Delight... I don't think I'd ever seen it before. I had this mental picture of some kind of whipped foam-type candy, and now I must adjust my thinking. Never will I try this stuff. It even looks like ass.
Comments by Melanie
Seriously? You guys don't have Big Turks in the US&A? They're so good - and low fat - and they make you giggle as you're eating them cus they look like chocolate covered curvy logs.
Comments by jasmine
I am seriously going to have to send you some Graeter's ice cream. The price, though, is outrageous! Hmm... how would you send some ice cream through the mail, thereby skipping the actual company's methods? Does that make sense?
You would love it. Do you have a favorite flavor?
Oh - and there's a reason the turkish aren't internationally known for their cuisine. Ha -maybe it should be called "toches" or "tuckus" delight.
Comments by Sybil Law
Now, if there were BACON in that thing it'd be an entirely different story!
Comments by bobgirrl
So really the moral of the story seems to be that you'll put anything in your mouth.
Also, a question about the smilies - why isn't the one that's going down on the other swallowing? What a wuss.
Comments by MyWeeWorld
Ugh. Big Turk was gross when I was a kid, I imagine it's gotten worse over the years. Just like pixie sticks or lik-a-maid.
Comments by sourpuss
*blink blink*
Lik... a... maid?
Comments by Poppy
Poppy, except for your brain.
Mel, that's how I pictured it too!
Jasmine, maybe in the states up there so far North that they might as well be Canada, but not here.
Sybil, I'm a fan of chocolate. And I have no idea about properly shipping ice cream.
Bobgirrl, even the wonders of bacon couldn't fix this one.
MyWeeWorld, pretty much.
Sourpuss, pixie sticks are good!
Poppy, yeah, those candy sticks that you would lick, then put into the packets of sugar and suck the sugar off.
Comments by Avitable
Yeah, Poppy! Get your mind out of the gutter & learn to use Google! hehehehe
Comments by sourpuss
I assure you, I know how to google. I just like it better when people tell me stuff sometimes. And, ... I also liked pointing out how obscene that candy sounds. Not that the US has a better name for it (dip sticks, n'est-ce pas?)
Comments by Poppy
Sourpuss, although, the idea of a "lick a maid" is strangely appealing.
Poppy, it's called Lik-a-maid here in the US, too, in some places.
Comments by Avitable
oh, that looks gross!
Comments by Webmiztris