On Friday, a friend bought a large deep fryer.
On Saturday, we got together, bought a huge variety of different foods, and had Fryday!
As I consumed more fried food in one sitting than most people eat in a year, I could hear my heart sobbing and begging for mercy. So I just chewed louder to drown out its voice.
The hour and a half I spent in my throne room afterwards was totally worth it. As was the night of sleeping sitting up in a chair to avoid acid reflux.
We're doing it again next weekend.
Go behind the link for photos (thanks to liquid):
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Sweet Jebus, my arteries clogged just looking at this. But if you learn how to make perfect donuts, you have my address ;).
Comments by Hilly
Wow, I really need to party with you!
Comments by Karl
my heart hurts in sympathy.
Comments by Amanda
Dude
I live in Mesa AZ. but when I drove truck long haul I would get White Castle cheese burgers buy the dozen's evey chance I got.
I can get them here frozen but their just not as good as fresh , I gotta get some now and try the deep fry I'll bet thats sooooooo gooooood .
Comments by Trukindog
As a fried food aficionado, you are my new best friend. I'll bring the Tums.
Comments by Kirsten
OK was anybody else a little bit afraid Adam was going to barf into the deep fryer and make Carolina eat it and then.... Yeah... the Southern Fried version of 2 girls 1 cup.
Comments by Y2k Survivor
OMG. Please tell me you are taking aspirin daily!!! I don't know whether to be jealous or repulsed and truthfully, since PMS is such a bitch I'm afraid that I'm just jealous and really pissed!
Comments by Amy
Seriously, did a defibrillator come free with the deep fryer?
You guys forgot the deep fried Twinkies. Those are my favorites! Mars bars are okay, but Twinkies are definitely best.
Comments by Jay
Awesome!
We also fried up the old deep fryer but only made fries. Frozen fries, even.
I feel ashamed.
(why did you not try fried twinkies? they're incredible!)
Comments by Wayne
Can I come over next week?
Comments by Karen
You sure you're not scottish?
Comments by Dan
those moz stix look delicious
Comments by masterofdungeons
HAVE ME OVER! HAVE ME OVER!!
Comments by Peggy
I was with you until the deep friend PB&J because that is just nasty.
Comments by Topncal
Urgh, it gives me heartburn just thinking about what you ate
Comments by iddly
You sure do know how to crank it up to 11 on the weekends!
Comments by Mr. Fabulous
Wow, I am amazed at your awesomeness. You are a God among God's. A friar, among mere fryers.
Forget it, that's a ton of food!
Comments by trishk
Hilly, we'll never be able to top Krispy Kreme.
Karl, anytime you're up here, let me know!
Amanda, I'll let my heart know.
Trukindog, use pancake batter for them.
Kirsten, Pepcid AC - we need the strong stuff.
Y2K, I think that was only you!
Amy, aspirin? For what?
Jay, yes, actually. We had a few people go into cardiac arrest and got good use out of it. Twinkies were there, but we were too full to do them.
Wayne, I've tried fried Twinkies before and they weren't awesome. We're going to try them next week, though.
Karen, bring something to fry.
Dan, well, I wasn't wearing any underwear and I did fuck a sheep, too.
Beth, they were very good. Not as good as some of the crazier stuff, though.
Peggy, fan of the fried, are you?
Topncal, it was actually pretty good. Not amazing, but not bad.
Iddly, yeah, gives me heartburn remembering it too.
Mr. Fabulous, 12.
TrishK, a friar among fryers. I like it.
Comments by Avitable
Say "Hi!" to Elvis for me... I am certain there's a special velvet roped corner of hell for Victims of Suicide by Deep Fryer :)
Robyn
Comments by borysSNORC ™
Oh Jesus Christ. I like fried food as much as the next American, but damn. Did you wake up this morning?
Comments by kapgar
Holy Shit!
Comments by metalmom
MMMMM.....
No deep fried twinkies?
Comments by ADW
Did you save me a deep fat fried Oreo?
Comments by Miss Britt
I'm buying stock in the phama...well I can't spell it but I mean the drug companies that produce artery busting drugs! How about deep fried ice cream, I hear it's good.
Comments by Summer
AHHhhhhHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHH.
NOM NOM NOM NOM.
GIMME BATTER.
Comments by Poppy
OMG, I cannot believe some of the crap that you fried. Did you sample EVERYTHING that you fried? Holy hell!
Comments by The Absurdist
I overheard a cell phone conversation yesterday at the drag strip where the girl was describing a cheeseburger with 2 Krispy Kreme doughnuts as buns and then deep fried.
I felt ill just looking at all that stuff.
Comments by tana
OMG.
I am starving now.
Lucky devil.
Comments by NYCWD
Avi, There's a place here in Austin called Plucker's and they have awesome fried pickles and fried twinkies. Really. I never would have even THOUGHT of trying something like that but a friend urged me.
That person is now my best friend and is the top person on my will.
Comments by Wayne
You are so disgusting!
Comments by Clown
Everything tastes better deep fat fried!!!
Comments by themuttprincess
I'd recommend a good beer to go with that spread but I know you don't care for alcohol, health nut that you are.
Comments by Grant
Yay! Now I have more dinner ideas!
Comments by Janelle
Robyn, um, clearly anyone who suicides by deep fryer would go to heaven.
Kapgar, I did it Saturday, and woke up Sunday feeling awesome!
Metalmom, that's one way to put it.
ADW, we didn't get around to it. We're saving them for next time.
Britt, they're no good two days later.
Summer, I'm not even sure how you deep fry ice cream.
Absurdist, yup - I ate everything and multiples of the cheeseburgers. So goooood.
Tana, I've heard about that cheeseburger. I need to try that.
NYCWD, I had to roll home.
Wayne, I think everything tasted better deep fried.
Clown, I'll deep fry your soul!
TMP, I agree completely! (Look two comments up)
Grant, alcohol is bad for you! Pass the Oreos.
Janelle, your poor children.
Comments by Avitable
Fired Oreos dipped in mayo... is this heaven?
Comments by Dave2
Dave, that sounds a bit like hell.
Poppy, we just used normal pancake batter - I wonder if we can have different flavors next time.
Comments by Avitable
oh how i love you...that was awesome...
Comments by hellohahanarf
Holy fuck
I was gonna go home and excersice now I am gonna go home and do an avitable it just looked so good
Mmmm grease
Comments by L
Holy fried Jesus on a toothpick. That all looked....
Fucking Amazing.
I want me some o' them deep fried Oreos.
Now.
Seriously.
Comments by Coal Miner's Granddaughter
You and me. Simpatico. I woke up this morning knowing I should eat plain yogurt and wheat germ. What was I thinking about?
I was thinking about that moment in Million Dollar Baby when Hillary Swank says "get me a deep fryer and some oreos.."
Yeah so you didn't invite me to your Fryday, and I am fine with that, seeing as you'd have put the socks I am making you straight into the deep fryer, from what I can see.
By the way, what size shoes do you wear?
Comments by Nina
Call me crazy, but after exploration of the candied boobs are there no deep fat fried tatas? Or is it your deep respect for women that prevents you from eating fried, candied representations of their knockers?
Comments by Maman
Holy Crap! I get nausea just from looking at that! Is there anything you didn't fry?
Comments by DutchBitch
You had me at White Castle.
Comments by golfwidow
I love fried food. I just like the normal fried foods, I guess. I do not need to know what fried pb &j tastes like! Or most of the stuff on your list. Did you guys change the oil, or use different batter for different stuff? I have so many questions... Why not pickles? Oooh - what about a deep fried banana placed on ice cream with some hot sauce?
I need a deep fryer.
Thanks.
Dammit!
Comments by Sybil Law
I meant hot FUDGE sauce. Mmmmmmmm
Comments by Sybil Law
uhm, yeah. I almost orgasmed. Almost.
Comments by Peggy
Fried Ice Cream... you nead to deep freeze the ice cream already scooped, and breaded (any plain bread crumbs will work). then drop in deep fryer for like a split second... or so.
and since I shared that secret with you, I think I should be invited to the next fryday. It's only a two hour drive for me, totally worth it.
Comments by Allyson
Jeebus. I'm having a heart attack just reading about it.
Comments by Shelli
Erik wants to recommend deep fried pickle and hard broiled egg. Don't ask me.
Comments by Robin
Down the street from me is a little stand that sells deep fried bacon-wrapped hot dogs. With ALL the fixin's. They're pretty popular, especially in the summer when the bars have just closed.
Just an idea. You know, in case you run outta shit to dump in there.
Comments by Mari
I highly suspect the other sock is not intact, only positioned so the holes face the floor. I have the exact same pair.
I'm ignoring the food frying fantasy as I just gained 25 pounds just looking at the pictures.
Comments by Mike
You're really not bending yourself far from the Homer Simpson inside of you these days. All I can think about is, http://alpha.zimage.com/~ant/antfarm/read/AntsOnHomerAndHisCandyBall.jpg
Comments by Jordie
Hello, indeed it was!
L, it's do "the Avitable", not "an Avitable". And it's copyrighted.
CMG, it was. You should have come down for Fryday.
Nina, you didn't get the invite? And I'm a size 13 shoe.
Maman, I should have tried that - didn't even occur to me!
DB, nausea? We fried everything that wasn't nailed down.
Golfwidow, we improved upon a classic.
Sybil, the fried PB&J tasted like a melty peanut butter sandwich with some raspberry flavoring. We kept the same oil for the whole night and used mainly pancake batter.
Peggy, I did orgasm. Twice.
Allyson, I'll have to try that. Do you want to drive two hours just for fried awesomeness?
Shelli, that's nothing compared with actually eating it!
Robin, pickles I've heard off. But eggs? Ew.
Mari, you just gave me a total woody.
Mike, shhhh - you had to ruin it!
Jordie, I wish I had a candy ball too!
Comments by Avitable
Oh my God. Just oh my God. Wow. I've never seen anything like that, but I bet I could accomplish some serious weight-gaining with that. The Oreos looked yummy!
Comments by MyWeeWorld
I have two Questions
[1] Are the white castles fresh from the freezer or are they thawed ?
[2] What is this 2 girls 1 cup thing ?
Comments by Trukindog
Trukindog, I'm sure Avi will be pleased to talk to you about 2 girls 1 cup.
Comments by Amanda
no, trukin dog, no!! for the love of all that is good, just say no! seriously, don't watch it.
Comments by hellohahanarf
Now I have, no need to see it...ya cant warn me like that it just peeks my curiosity .
Comments by Trukindog
Trukindog - No! I was just like you, but Avitable taught me the error of my ways! Noooooooooo! You do NOT want to see it!
Comments by Sybil Law
I didn't think that White Castle burgers could be any worse for you, but there you go.
Now I want some! Why put off the inevitable (in-Avitable?) cardiac arrest?
Comments by B.E. Earl
I'm gonna find you a cardiologist and put him/her on standby.
Comments by Bec
MyWeeWorld, you could probably double your size in one night.
Trukindog, they were frozen. And here's 2girls1cup: http://www.avitable.com/2007/10/26/dont-you-fucking-dare/.
Amanda, you mean you don't want to?
Hello, c'mon, don't scare him away.
Sybil, it helped you open your horizons, right?
B.E. Earl, nice pun!
Bec, I've got four.
Comments by Avitable
Your smart, beautiful, witty employee (whose name rhymes with schmitt) should rethink her plan to (allegedly) off her boss. All she needs to do is buy you your own fryer. Talk about a foolproof plan!
Comments by Mrs RW
OH!!!!!!MY!!!!!!!GOD!!!!!!!!!
My eye's are bleeding .
But I guess I have a pretty strong stomach cause I just ate dinner and watched the whole thing and did'nt get sick , I am however mentally FREAKED OUT
The vidio's of people watching it are funny as hell though .
Comments by Trukindog
Damn....that's a buttload of deep fried goodness!!
Comments by Melissa
LMAO!!–Dude you have got to try Twinkies and pickles and peeps
For the peeps they need to be frozen and the oil temp needs to be just right.
Comments by turnbaby
I love Deep-fried Snickers! The PBJ's look good, too.
Hey, how do I see the profile of one of your commenters? I want to find "Trukindog"!
J.
Comments by HoosierGirl
For the love of God would you please buy some news fuckin' socks??!?!
or you could just dip that funky one in pancake batter and deep fry it...maybe it would cover the holes. Then Jigsaw could gnaw on your foot.
Comments by Stephanie
You must try the deep-fried twinkies. I tried one when I lived in Arkansas. You may consider doing this in the ER parking lot next time though, just in case.
Comments by Honeybell
HoosierGirl
I want to find "Trukindog"!
Is this a good thing or a bad thing ?
Comments by Trukindog
ooohhhhhhh....how about deep fried cheesecake??
want.some.
Comments by Stephanie
Mrs. RW, I know. You'd think she'd know that.
Trukindog, now you should Google 4girlsfingerpaint.
Melissa, and a gutload.
Turnbaby, I hate pickles. I'll have to try Peeps, though.
HG, if he doesn't have a blog, there's no profile.
Stephanie, I almost deep fried my sock that night.
Honeybell, I carry my own defibrillator.
Trukindog, hmmm.
Stephanie, I've had something like that before. It's not as good as it sounds.
Comments by Avitable
HoosierGirl
I was born in Lafayette In. if that helps.
Comments by Trukindog
Dear god Adam, are you okay? I am checking to see if you have a pulse! Good for you, living it up is the only way to go out! LMAO
Comments by Rachel
Trukndog....Stop by my blog sometime! I love truckers!!
J.
Comments by HoosierGirl
Trukindog, go visit http://www.coffee-table.blogspot.com/ and chat with HoosierGirl. I feel like I'm running a dating show here.
Rachel, if I can die facefirst in a pile of fried cheeseburgers, I'll die happy.
HG, such a flirt!
Comments by Avitable
I'm torn.
The side of me that had cardiac bypass at age 37 thinks that may not be the best idea in the world.
The fried food loving, overeating co-dependent enabler side of me says FUCK YEAH!!!!
(I like the second guy a lot more).
Comments by Functionally ReTodded
Todd, I like that second guy, too.
Comments by Avitable
Comments by Tracy Lynn
I think I threw up a little after seeing your socks.
Comments by calps
Tracy, you know you wished you had been there.
Calps, I don't blame you.
Comments by Avitable
Forgot to mention that I've had deep-fried twinkies and they were great. Serve sprinkled with powder sugar,strawberries and whipped cream...mmmm! You'd think they'd be overly sweet but somehow they're not. Must be the miracle of the fryer: fat beats sweet like scissors beat paper.
Comments by Mrs RW
Mrs. RW, that sounds pretty tasty. We're doing it again tonight, so I'll have to go pick up some whipped cream.
Comments by Avitable
This makes me crave jalapeno poppers. And chicken fingers covered in american cheese and dipped in sour cream. I forgot how wonderful it is to have a deep fry in the house. No wonder I lost so much weight when I moved out of my parents house.
Comments by LylaLou