"Speak", by Lindsay Lohan
I love redheads. And freckles. And overprocessed music. And disaffected youth who are slowly trainwrecking their entire life. So, as you can imagine, I love Lindsay Lohan.
She's recently posed nude for the New York Magazine in a tribute to Marilyn Monroe (who was kinda cute but way too blond), and I am posting the pictures here for all of your viewing pleasures.
You can click the picture below to go to the full mondo-sized set on Flickr, or just go below the fold to see the Lohantasticness in its pure naked glory sized to fit on this blog.
I'm a Lohanatic and proud of it.
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She looks like shit in these pictures.
This is a horrible tribute to both Lindsey Lohan and Marilyn Monroe.
Comments by Miss Britt
I wouldn't kick her out of bed
Comments by Amanda
I had no idea it was possible for a 21 year old girl to look like a 50 year old crack whore living under a bridge.
This is the most offensive excuse Lohan has ever used to get naked. Used to be she'd take it all off because it was Tuesday and she was trying to score some meth. Implicating Marilyn Monroe was not necessary.
(I hate Lohan. Just like I hate Nascar. I know. I am hateful).
Comments by Nina
I want to play connect the freckles with my tongue.
Kinda funny how nearly 46 years after her death Marilyn Monroe suddenly wasn't a drunk or a slut or a totally screwed up Anna Nicole Smith type bimbo. Now people pretend she was a talented, morally upstanding citizen.
Comments by Jay
*shivering*
You've right put me off my evening wankoff.
Blecch. Is there anybody left out there that doesn't think Lohan is trailer trash? Trailer trash with money, but trailer trash nevertheless.
Comments by Karl
Full disclosure. I don't care for Lohan to begin with. I think she looks like the train wreck that she mentally is. Still, these are awful pictures even for her.
Have to admit though, the girl has range.
Fourth from top - 80 year old face
Sixth from top - Melted Home Alone face
Ninth from top - Pro Domestic Abuse face
I don't think there are enough brightly colored loofah sponges in Pleasantville to wash away all of the filth that's surely on her.
Comments by Clown
Sweet Rack but Lindsay as a blond
Red makes me randy baby yeah!
Comments by Trukindog
Holy shit! Marilyn is surely turning in her grave over this... Lohan is gag-inducing horrific in these photos. If only there was a way to go back in time and warn myself not to click through on this entry and have my memories of a true goddess soiled so badly.
Comments by Dave2
I think I just got a Herbie.
Comments by Wayne
my eyes my eyes!!!
Marilyn was soooo much prettier and originally a redhead:)
Comments by DaDuck
Umm... OK... I am definitely not into Lindsay... I know for sure now... but it's ok if you are. I love you still the same...
Comments by DutchBitch
She has a lovely body but damn she looks ugly with blonde hair...
Comments by Dee
I have always been a Lohanatic and proud of it too. I have built up my stamina to the point where I can masturbate all through Mean Girls with no break at all.
Comments by Mr. Fabulous
Who in the heck is Lindsey Lohan?
Comments by Aunt Robin
Sorry but these are some of the worst pictures of her I have seen. She looks so bad. Let this be a lesson to our kids. To stay of smack.
Comments by Topncal
You do know she is a Nascar fan, right?
Comments by Trishk
Glad I didn't check this one out at work. Phew! But quite nice.
Comments by kapgar
I am happy to report that Lindsay Lohan's hometown on Long Island is not part of the city.
Sadly, we continue to have fucktard immigration problems from that area. These pictures are just further evidence of why we need to build a wall between Long Island and the rest of the world.
There must really be something in the water if she actually thought this was a good idea for a comeback.
Comments by NYCWD
I'm so sorry I clicked play–ugh.
And quite honestly I think she is a beautiful girl.
But these pics are not.
She in NO WAY evokes any thought of Marilyn Monroe–not even close. I can't fathom that anyone thought she did.
She looks hard and worn.
But on the upside I now KNOW I have better tits ;-)
Comments by turnbaby
I think she is attractive. Despite blonde not being her hair color at all, she gives me an erection.
Furthermore, I'd very much enjoy the opportunity to insert my penis into her vagina.
Comments by Functionally ReTodded
She does not look good as a blond so I'll just focus on the rest. She's definitely hot, I'd so do her.
Comments by Robin
That looks less like a tribute and more like a parody (on Lohan's part). Maybe she just needs darker lipstick, but I think she really could use a clue.
Comments by golfwidow
Okay. The girl has no hips, and those boobs are TOTALLY fake. Hair looks terrible. She looks NOTHING like Marilyn Monroe. The freckles are just too much. Did you see that little fat piece when she is laying down? She is so ugly. She looks like a boy with a fake rack.
Fucking bitch. That should be me.
Comments by The Absurdist
I have to admit that I think she has nice breasts. Sigh. To only have a rack that nice for myself....
Comments by Coal Miner's Granddaughter
I don't think she can compare to Marilyn at all, but her boobs are nice. And while I'm not a boob connoisseur they look pretty real to me.
Comments by Em
I prefer Japanese women, so if I come into possession of Lindsay I'll trade her to you.
Comments by Grant
I like her boobies, but the pics... not so much. And she is much better as a redhead.
Comments by ADW
Britt, I think she's beyoooootiful.
Amanda, I wouldn't kick her out of bed for eating crackers, unless Crackers was my dog's name.
Nina, oooh, you are hateful. And feisty!
Jay, I know - Marilyn's been elevated way higher than she should have been.
Karl, I don't! I love Lindsay Lohan!
Clown, bah. You think Chewbacca aka Rachel Bilson is cute.
Trukindog, so tell me how you really feel.
Dave, Marilyn is so not a true goddess. Betty White was a true goddess.
Wayne, bravo. HAHAHAHAHA!
DaDuck, she was a strawberry blonde. Lindsay is a total REDHEAD. /drools
DB, I just can't help myself.
Dee, ugly? Never!
Mr. Fabulous, I knew I liked you. Wanna kidnap her and have a threesome?
Aunt Robin, really? Do you ever watch TV? She's second in line to Britney for Trainwreck Starlet of the Year.
Topncal, I don't know. I think the smack has enhanced her beauty.
TrishK, never!
Kapgar, oh yeah. Did I mention it's NSFW?
NYCWD, well, I think it's brilliant. She's much prettier than Marilyn.
Turnbaby, are you disparaging Lindsay's beautiful freckled bosoms? How dare you!
Todd, you can't have her. She's mine!
Robin, thank you.
Golfwidow, no I think it's a tribute. And if anything, blame the photographer and makeup guy, not her.
Absurdist, her boobs are real. And the freckles are just fanfuckingtastic. I love freckles.
CMG, I'm sure your rack is awesome, too!
Em, she's much better than Marilyn, in my opinion.
Grant, ok. I'll keep my eye out for someone to cure your yellow fever.
ADW, but the freckles! All over! So. Hot.
Comments by Avitable
I think she's beautiful too. That's my point - there was no need for her to do a horrible imitation of Marilyn Monroe to look good. And it flopped. Miserably.
Like I told you last night - there are so few (none come to mind) iconic red heads... she should be EMBRACING that, rather than trying to imitate an "iconic blonde". Because whether you love MM or acknowledge that while alive she had the reputation of a floozy - there's no denying that she is synonymous with Blonde Bombshell.
Lindsey (and Stern) missed the chance to create another star by doing what one commenter wisely called a "parody" of another.
Comments by Miss Britt
Oh, and, I forgot to add:
Your opinion doesn't count. You think anyone who weighs less than 150 pounds and shows their tits on the Internet is beautiful. The crappier the picture, the better.
Comments by Miss Britt
Oh I didn't disparage. I have better ones. That does not mean hers are bad at all.
Comments by turnbaby
Britt, I would love to see more red hair, that's true. And my opinion counts! I have very discriminating taste.
Turnbaby, hers are out there for the world to judge. You should email me yours so I can make the final judgment call.
Comments by Avitable
"I have very discriminating taste."
Dude, sell that line to someone who hasn't seen your personal porn collection.
Comments by Miss Britt
I'm certain you consider yourself some sort of expert in the field
Comments by turnbaby
And LOLOL "discrimintating taste" —for dolphin porn
Comments by turnbaby
I agree with Britt.
Lindsay's boobies are weird. And not in a good way.
Comments by Poppy
I wanna sex her up.
Comments by the108
EPIC FAIL.
I think she is beautiful when she is cleaned up and red-headed. This? Trainwrecky.
Comments by Karen Sugarpants
The difference being: Marilyn died tragically after her photo shoot, and (from the looks of these photos) Lohan died tragically before her photo shoot.
Comments by BOSSY
Britt, I can't help that I like amateur stuff! Professional porn skeeves me out.
Turnbaby, I would be happy to render my expert opinion.
Poppy, her boobs are awesome!
The108, me too. Wanna make a go for it?
Karen, I do have a predilection for trainwrecky, though.
Bossy, I will forgive your transgressions against Lindsay only because you made me laugh.
Comments by Avitable
The last picture makes her look like a boy in drag because of the OBVIOUS and HORRIBLE wig, the way too dark eyebrows, her tiny nipples.....
Comments by Turnbaby
The colored shots (minus the first one) aren't bad but she really doesn't look good so blonde! And that first picture - her boobs look like a 40 year old not a 21 year old - too saggy. What's up with that? lol
Comments by Cheri
I hope they let her keep the underwear after they finished the shoot.
Comments by Girl, Dislocated
She looks MUCH better with darker hair.
Her boobs look good either way.
Comments by themuttprincess
um...no. that girl looks rode hard and put away wet. she looks twenty years older than she really is. nyet
Comments by Crys
Love the added "fire crotch" on that first pic!
Her Dad comes into my friend's restaurant every now and again, and he swears he's gonna bring Freckle Tits with him one night.
Sure...like she's about to take a night off from whorin' it up in NYC any time soon!
Comments by B.E. Earl
Seriously?! She does NOT look good in these pictures at all. She is normally pretty cute, but these pictures make her look incredibly old and used up. Ick. Which, since you think these pictures are so good, makes me think you must be liking the older ladies now, too. Hmm.... Interesting...
Comments by Sybil Law
Turnbaby, nothing wrong with those nipples.
Cheri, she's definitely hotter as a redhead!
Girl, Dislocated, I wish they would send me the underwear.
TMP, yes, they do.
Crystal, she just needs some gentle Avitable lovin'.
BE Earl, mmmm..... freckle tits.
Comments by Avitable
Sybil, I like trainwrecks, what can I say?
Comments by Avitable
when she has her gorgeous red hair, i would so do her. i'm all about folks not being fake and her as a blonde is just so, so bad. especially with her wig or weave so visable in that last shot.
but that girl is gorgeous when she is rockin her god given assets. yep, i'd do her.
Comments by hellohahanarf
I've seen other photos where stars are made up to look like stars from Hollywood's Golden Age (Martha Stewart as Veronica Lake was actually mind-blowing because the photo looked like Veronica Lake and nothing like Martha Stewart.) And, I've always liked them.
I actually like the picture of Lindsay on the bed the best because right there she really doesn't look like herself at all.
But, I do miss the cute Lindsay Lohan from the Parent Trap remake. She was SO freakin' adorable.
Comments by Amy
Not impressive to me at all...she looks ROUGH.
Comments by Tug
Hello, I do love her when she has her red hair flowing.
Amy, Golden Age? Bah, more like Rusty Broken Age. :D
Tug, rough, but you can see how she'd look normal again pretty quickly. I dig that.
Comments by Avitable
I think Lindsay is cute in her own way but not here and not blonde. She did a great disservice to Marilyn. She should have stuck with the whole Ann Margret thing!
Comments by metalmom
Gosh, I don't know what to say that hasn't been said yet, but this girl needs a real friend. So does Britney Spears. So did Anna Nicole. It's so sad. That said, I wouldn't mind if my boobs were that big.
Comments by MyWeeWorld
Sorry I have to side with the "These pics are Barftastic" side of the argument. I think Lohan can be attractive but something here ruined the look. I am hoping it is bad makeup and not irriversable damage.
Oh and I disagree on the no redheaded icons. What about Maureen O Sullivan or Mureen O'Hara? Sheeesh O'Sullivan was like the first semi nude chick in movies.
Comments by Y2K Survivor
Actually I said...
"there are so few (none come to mind) iconic red heads."
But, you're right. It should probably be edited to say
"no iconic red heads whose name anyone my age would know."
Comments by Miss Britt
I have red hair, green eyes and freckles but can't sing a note and my life isn't a train wreck at the moment, that's were my similarity ends. Marilyn was much curvier and womanly than Lindsay. Why did she even try to imitate her?
Comments by Summer
My 21 year old looks just like her (when Lindsay has red hair). If I introduce you to her, would you be her sugar daddy and take care of her and my granddaughter?
Comments by Shelli
Metal Mom is dead on! Ann Margret is much better for Lindsay!
Comments by Sybil Law
What is it with redheads trying to be blond? Nicole Kidman and Lohan BOTH look so much better as redheads yet they've gone with that washed out blond look...
Comments by Dee
ok, i looked at these photos again. and they really are pretty decent shots, with the exception of the terrible hairline on the last photo. i mean, seriously, i would do her. and i would give a lot to have boobs that small.
but what i don't get is why she would allow her mother to bring her 14 year old sister to the set. wtf is up with these people? (dammit, where is the crazy smilie?)
Comments by hellohahanarf
Metalmom, I don't think anyone can do a disservice to Marilyn, who is already highly overrated.
MyWeeWorld, I'll be her friend.
Y2K, I don't know who those people are, old man!
Britt, unless they were on Golden Girls, I probably don't know who they are.
Summer, you do? Plz send pix kthxbai.
Shelli, I've always wanted to adopt.
Sybil, yeah, but are there any iconic Ann Margret photo shoots?
Dee, I don't know. I love redheads and the full-on red hair look.
Hello, what's wrong with bringing her 14-year old sister? It's not like her sister hasn't seen her naked.
Comments by Avitable
She's no Marilyn.
Comments by Jenny, Bloggess
Jenny, I like her better.
Comments by Avitable
Ha! You made me laugh so hard prune juice nearly shot out of my nose.
Comments by Y2K Survivor
Y2K, I was serious, though!
Comments by Avitable
While I always welcome some Lohan Nakedness,
I am actually surprised that the first real full frontal nudity came in the form of a "tasteful" (not my words)artsy-fartsy article. I fully expected her to be spreading her thights for money for Playboy, Penthouse, or at least in a bad home-movie porn by now.
And oh yeah, I'd
Comments by D-USA
D-USA, well, there was no vag shot. That will be in Penthouse, I'm sure.
Comments by Avitable
She does have really tiny nipples, but then I haven't seen that many so maybe all the girls I've seen just have huge nipples. Or maybe crack fuck with your nipples, who knows.
Comments by Carolyn Jeffries
Carolyn, tiny delicious looking nipples!
Comments by Avitable
Oh my God. Seriously dude. Why don't you just PAY HIM to advertise on his fucking site?!?!?!
Comments by Miss Britt
Britt, he's been SPAMIFIED now!
Comments by Avitable