Fucking Brighthouse
If you're seeing this, then this means that my fucking Internet is still down and I wasn't able to write my post before midnight. If it wasn't for my iPhone, I'd have no post at all!
So just pretend that I've written something extremely witty and hilarious and comment accordingly.
If you're new to the horrors of Avitable.com, don't miss out. Subscribe to my RSS feed!
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HAHA FUCKER! This is what you get for being mean to Canadians! :lmao:
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But that's what I always do.
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OMG Dude, that was hilarious! You are a true comic genius. And your penis is huge.
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ha! Dave is funny.
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So just pretend that I've written something extremely witty and hilarious and comment accordingly.
And how is this different from the other 364 days of the year? :sexytime:
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Best. Post. Ever.
Hahahahaha
Good luck with the internets. Fuckers.
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you must be twitching something fierce! hope you are back up and running quickly.
god bless the iphone!!
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Yeah, what Amanda said. Both times.
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For fuck's sake – I was going to say the same thing…. The Canadians control the world. Did you know???
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Wow. Sucks to be you. How am I supposed to get to sleep tonight? Thank God for batteries.
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Way to tell a story, man. Riveting.
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I just laughed so much, I pissed my pants…you are a comic genius sir.
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Your wit and brilliance never cease to amaze me!
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Sheesh must be nice to have an iPhone. I'm so jealous.
But that sucks that your internet is down. I sympathize.
oh shit. I forgot I'm supposed to pretend. But wait. usually I don't say anything at all. Crap, I messed it up.
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I feel a little less bad about my seven word post from Saturday. So thanks for that.
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I think I'd rather have no water than no internet.
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Actually, I think this is some of your best work.
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got any more pics of *squirt* ADW and *squirt* Britt?
I swear to god, if I cum one *squirt* more time ……I'm gonna ex *squirt* SPLODE!
*BOOM*
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IS IT WORKING YET!!!
I thought I'd shout it out at ya, ya know, in case it still isn't working and you can't see this… you might at least be able to hear me…sorta…
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Avi + ISP = :sex011:
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So then, I shouldn't bother coming into work today?
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HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH! Coffee on my computer screen! Out my nose! Doubled over with laughter! Ty-man calling ambulance! Can't breathe!
Heh-hem. There. Was that good enough?
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And this makes today different how?
:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:
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Some people say canada is america's hat. I say they're america's ass-hat.
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buahahahahahahahahaha! Dude that was friggin' hilarious!
Oh wait…
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And they had the nerve to give the Pulitzer to Bob Dylan.
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BPR, I know! Damn. I love Canadians, though!
Dave, then carry on, good sir.
Amanda, I like you the best.
Mona, at least, this time, we're both aware of it.
Sybil, it's fixed now!
Hello, I just said fuck it and went to bed, but if it hadn't been working this morning I would have been in withdrawal.
Mary, you're my second favorite.
Claudia, I did not know that. Dayummmmmm.
TSM, you read batteries instead of my post?
Karl, I'm a weaver of tales.
Martin, I accept this fake praise with full sincerity.
Chris, me either!
Yoshi, why don't you go buy an iPhone then?
Nina, anything to make you feel better.
Dan, same here.
Mr. Fabulous, I also think this is one of your best comments ever.
Zom, are you lactating?
DB, thanks for trying.
Turnbaby, it's more like I'm a dependent baby suckling at the teat of the ISP.
Britt, I'll fashion a crude internet out of cans and coconuts.
CMG, that was superb. You deserve an Oscar.
NYCWD, too bad you're only like the fifth person to say that!
Todd, I think they're America's sock.
Kapgar, you started off strong, but your landing was weak.
Golfwidow, I know. Bastards.
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I'm with Dan. Who needs water?
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There's no smiley for that.
Oh wait like these? :boobs2:
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This post was much better than my last one about how much I love rye toast, so no worries.
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No Avey, I really did piss my pants. But thinking about it,I do that most mornings, so it may have had nothing to do with your wonderfully crafted post.
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Someone is testy this morning.
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Finally – a short post. Dooce and the woman who spanked you would be proud.
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Nobel prize-worthy! :thumbsup:
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Now I just want to throw you down on the floor and fuck you silly. :sexytime:
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Your post was sufficent and straight to the point.
I find that extremely sexy.
:boobs3:
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This is destined to become a classic. Kudos and congrats.
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So, how much does it irk you that everyone loves this post so much, more so than pretty much any of your others?
Oh, that's right, you don't get mad.
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Betcha those review chics would like it :sex014:
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That's hilarious! But where's the big (and I'm sure totally accurate) floor length penis on the little drawing guy?
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OMG! ROTFLMAO! Awesome, dude…I don't know how you continue to come up with the brilliant content!
(Commenting accordingly, as per instructions. Hope your internet is back soon!)
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This post was so good, that I almost want to show you my tits.
Almost. :finger:
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You don't love me… :crying:
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Brilliant post. One of your best.
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I'm never reading this blog again.
Never.
If you can't post daily, it's not worth my time.
But, I guess if I can put up porno smilies, I'll stick around.
:sex011: :sex014: :sex014: :boobs4: :boobs3: :boobs3:
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OMG. I cant remember the last blog that sucked this much.
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Brighthouse has been acting up a bit around here. The internet is fine but for whatever reason the cable is acting strange.
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omg fucking BRILLIANT…i never knew how much you loved me…
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i am sitting here with my homefires burning. missing you, omg. MISSING YOU.
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Em, exactly. As long as I have my Diet Coke.
Turnbaby, close enough.
BE Earl, but rye toast is awesome!
Martin, aw, that's too bad.
Poppy, testes?
Grant, that's my goal!
Metalmom, and I should get a Perfect Post Award, too.
Finn, that's common. There's a pill for that.
TMP, me too. I'm touching myself now.
Jennifer, it will be discussed for generations to come.
Poppy, it was also an experiment of mine. And why would that make me mad?
Turnbaby, maybe. It might still be too long for them.
Sarah, he's dressed.
Tracy, it's back up. Finally.
Tracy Lynn, damn. I'll try harder next time.
Sybil, where'd that come from? Why not?
Gwen, I thought so.
Angie, porno smilies rock.
Keith, I know, right? So's your face!
AmyD, they had no explanation for why everything went out last night.
Amanda, it's all about you, isn't it?
Crystal, I'm back!
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I refuse to answer your questions.
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You love Amanda the best, and Mary is your second favorite. Poor me. :crying:
Don't mind me… this shoulda gone with your vagina post… I am hormonal. I feel like Britt's been kicking me in the stomach AND back.
It's okay, though – I still love you… and I still plan to send you a package, but I want it to be a surprise. (Don't get all excited, 'cause it ain't that exciting!)
Time for soccer practice! Whipppeeeee!
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:cocksuck2: :sex007: :sex011: :boobs3:
I see your T'interweb is working again
The post still makes me want to suckle at your huge balls
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:cocksuck2: :sex007: :sex011: :boobs3:
I see your T'interweb is working again
The post still makes me want to suckle at your huge balls :cock:
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How's this:
"BWAAAHAHAHAHAAA!!! ROFLMAO!!!"
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I'm absolutely dazzled by your wit.
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You are sooo cute I want to shrink you down to the size of a jelly bean and carry you around me me in my ear to tell me funny stories like that whenever I need a little laugh.
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I am guessing you got some sort of internet back. grats.
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It's nice to know it aint just happening to me. YOu know I went out, got a whole new ISP, dumped my home phone, turned on the new system and had no signal for 24 hours. Ooops, goof up on the guy who installed it.
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Fuckers. I had a shitty cable internet provider once. Fortunately there is a second cable provider here and I was able to escape. Until the punk next door started downloading porn 24×7 and made it slow.
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