It was yesterday. Around 11 AM. We're sitting out on my porch and Britt is smoking (loudly, as usual).
Me: "It's too bad that we're flying in on Saturday instead of Friday."
Britt: "I know! SHMMMACKPOOOOOFFFF! So many people are getting there tomorrow instead!"
Me: "Well, we'll still have plenty of fun. We'll only be missing Friday night, basically."
Britt: "Yeah, but SNOZARARSHMOONNNNNPHHHAA! all of the cool people are going to be there Friday!"
Me: "I wonder how much it would cost to change our tickets?"
Britt: "That's brilliant!" She punches me in the arm. "Go find out! MMMMARRZZZZPHOOOMMM!"
Me: "Well, yeah, but how will your kids get home from daycare? Jared works until 7 tom-"
Britt: "Fuck it! We'll figure it out. Maybe I'll just give Devin the keys to the car. PHHHHANNNNPHHHARRRGGHHHZZ! Go find out!"
Me: "But shouldn't we figure out the details firs-"
Britt: "Fuck no! Go find out!" She punches me again. "SHARMMMMMPHOOOONNNNNKOW!"
Me: "But-"
Britt: "Do it, bitch! I will stab you in your nose! WWWHHHOOOOOORRMMMMAPHOO!"
So, an hour on the phone and $360 later, instead of having all day today to plan my trip to Tequilacon and pack, I only had last night.
As you can imagine, I probably won't be replying to comments today or this weekend. I have, however, added a Twitter widget to the right of my blog, and I plan on tweeting regularly, so you can keep updated on the site, or just follow me.
See you all Monday!
If you're new to the horrors of Avitable.com, don't miss out. Subscribe to my RSS feed!
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Have a great time!
Comments by Amanda
Oh, I'll be following you. Not on Twitter. LOL See you tomorrow. Guess I'm one of the cool people. Yeah, right, I kill myself!
Comments by Shelli
Awesome. You've got my cell, right? I get in at 1:45pm.
Comments by Karl
sweet baby jeebus, you follow over 200 people on twitter?!??!?! dammit, you are also one of THEM. i might not pick you up at the airport. freak.
(are you going to sneak into our room and try to get photos of me and britt and hilly snuggling?)
Comments by hello haha narf
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhahahahaha! YOU FOLLOW DOOCE!!!!
this info just made my fucked up week oh so much better. hehe
Comments by hello haha narf
Have a hella good time. And some great tequila, if available.
Comments by B.E. Earl
"What's Tequilacon?" He asked enigmatically.
ON EDIT: Oh and what was that thing you sent me for "Twitter" a week or two ago? I clicked OK or whatever. Now what do I do?
Comments by RW
Have a great time dude, and since you don't drink I'm counting on you to get lot's of pics. of drunk nekkid blogger chicks...and email them to me.
Comments by Trukindog
Bwahahahahahahahaha
Is that REALLY the sounds she makes while smoking? Holy shit! She might wanna consider giving it up..
Have fun at TC2008! Wish I could be there with y'all!!!
Comments by DutchBitch
$360?!?!?!?
Comments by Girl, Dislocated
Have fun, can't wait for the stories afterwards!
Comments by Charissa
Where's the twitter thingy? Oh now I see it. Avitter. Clever.
Comments by whall
Booze on Avit! Booze on!
Comments by jake titus
you're missing Iron Man, the greatest movie in a looooooong time!!!
Comments by jared
I'm so not cool. I didn't even know about TC until yesterday... and I know nothing about tonight!
See ya Saturday.
Comments by bubblewench
Yeah well, I don't even know what the hell Tequila Con is, so I've decided it's probably dead boring.
But if they ever have one in WV? I am so there..
Comments by Miss Anne Derstood
I NEVER called you BRILLIANT!!!
Lying fuck.
Comments by Miss Britt
You guys rock for coming in early...now I have more time to gush over you ;).
See you tonight....I get in around 5:30. Karl will coordinate my events for me, haha.
Comments by Hilly
I was about to ask how one smokes loudly, but then you onomatopoeized (sp?) the action and I can totally imagine it now. Jesus Christ, Britt, smoke with your mouth closed. That's disgusting.
Comments by kapgar
Amanda, hopefully.
Shelli, I'll just look for my shadow.
Karl, I've got it.
Hello, I don't have your cell, I don't think. Email it to me, will ya?
Hello, I follow Dooce because it's a good way to know your enemy.
BE Earl, well, it is called TequilaCon, so I guess we'll see.
RW, you know what TC is - you've been reading Dave's blog long enough. If not, try Google. And Twitter is an app where people can post from their phone or computer and give short updates on what they're doing. You follow people who Twitter, and it becomes one long, continuous conversation. Very interesting.
Trukindog, that's my plan too.
DB, that's exactly what she sounds like!
Girl, Dislocated, well, for two flights.
Charissa, as long as my leaky brain doesn't forget them.
Whall, "Clever," he said with heavy sarcasm.
Jake, who's Zon? And why am I booing him?
Jared, I know! I'll have to go see it in Philly.
Bubblewench, sounds good.
M.A.D., try Google.
Britt, you called me brilliant. Or was it highly reflective? I don't remember now.
Hilly, you mean gush literally, right? Like from your vagina?
Kapgar, oh, that is with her mouth closed - that's just how she sucks it in. It's pretty hilarious.
Comments by Avitable
POOOOOOOOP!!!!! I can't believe I'm not going to be there. I was scheduled to go and then got roped into a conferencre call today. I'm hosting a Cinco de Mayo party tomorrow just to keep from crying all day. I may have to stop reading blogs this weekend.
Comments by Gwen
Well of course I know what it really is, silly, I'm trying to be an enigma and you're NOT helping. My avatar has his back turned. See? Enigmatic.
But I am confused about Twitter. You sent me an email invite and I signed on but I have no real idea what I'm supposed to do with it. And that is NOT me kidding.
Comments by RW
ah, two versions of the same event — we used to see this all the time on sitcoms, if you recall. it doesn't matter who happens to be correct, it just matters that you take lots of photos of Miss Britt drunk!
Comments by Crys
I spent 15 minutes trying to sound out the sounds she was supposed to be making. My husband thinks I've lost it.
And how do you smoke loudly?
Comments by Maria
HAVE FUN!
I know I can count on you for lots of pictures!
Comments by themuttprincess
Funny how it works out like that isn't it?
Hope you have a blast!
Comments by yoshi
Have fun!
Comments by Robin
Take lots of pictures, too! Blackmail pics. Those are the most fun!
Comments by Sybil Law
HAHAHAHAHA! Stab you in the nose! HAHAHAHAHA!
Comments by Tracy Lynn
I love the two versions–and I'm sure they're both entirely correct. Can't wait to read the updates about the event.
Sarah
Comments by Ok, Where Was I?
That's awesome!!
I want drunk texting and be sure to give Hello a good JACKIE CHAN!
Comments by Turnbaby
Gwen, conference call? That's your excuse?
RW, Twitter is a way to keep up on the inanities of life even more than a blog.
Crystal, I will!
Maria, she just inhales and puffs out really loudly.
TMP, I'll try.
Yoshi, me too!
Robin, you can make it up here, can't you? It's not that far.
Sybil, nobody has anything worth blackmailing, though.
Tracy, it's true, too.
Ok, Where Was I, they are both correct.
Turnbaby, will do!
Comments by Avitable
I'm twittering now!
Comments by Stephanie
Duh...i forgot.
It's under "Stetsybits" on Twitter. I'm watching you guys!!!!!!!
Comments by Stephanie
Like, OMG! I am sooooooo jealous that you get to hang out with all the COOL people on Friday night!
Comments by Dave2
life. is. not. fair.
Comments by BlondeBlogger
Peeeeeee Essssssssssss:
New blog at http://shoewhorewhocooks.wordpress.com/
Back in the saddle again.
Comments by Stephanie
I am honestly glad you both decided to show up a day early. Friday was equally as fun as Saturday. (Sunday was just ok. [hehehehe])
Comments by Poppy
Stephanie, hopefully you'll keep this blog longer than the other.
Dave, you should be - we had tons more fun than you two!
BB, there's always next year.
Poppy, Friday was definitely equally fun.
Comments by Avitable