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Porn porn pornitty porn

There’s this internet phenom called sfwporn. Basically, it’s hardcore porn that is horribly and amateurishly drawn over in MS Paint to make it more innocuous, or Safe For Work. After seeing this for the first time yesterday, I was inspired to create my own. Behold:

Free Weights:
sfwporn_1 (Here is the NSFW original)

I Scream for Ice Cream:
sfwporn_2(Here is the NSFW original)

Will You Marry Me?
sfwporn_3(Here is the NSFW original)

At The Old Ball Game:
sfwporn_4(Here is the NSFW original)

Cheering!
sfwporn_5(Here is the NSFW original)

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66 Replies to “Porn porn pornitty porn”

  1. Poppy

    Soooo… porn?

    Britt, cover your eyes.

    I’m not clicking on those links. I don’t want to get all horned out over other people’s sexy bits before I have “Dawg and Poppy fantasy time”.

    … well, ok, maybe one.

  2. whall

    I wonder how many people you will frustrate by it being Friday, at work, and truly unable to click the links for fear of what would be logged on the proxy servers.

    And for some reason I first thought you said swfporn, not sfwporn, so immediately I thought it was flash-based (ShockWave Flash) and it was going to be interactively nastified.

    I will not disclose whether or not I was disappointed when I found out it was not swfporn.

  3. Maria

    In the 4th, the dick in her mouth wasn’t even hard. That boggles me when I see that in porn. How detached do you have to be to be soft in a threesome with a decently hot chick?

    I think I’d cry if he had to jack a bit to stay rock if I was in that position.

    Oh, yeah, good covers! :p

    Edit: And the guy standing up? You forgot to pants his right leg. Yes. I studied that threesome shot *that* hard. I’m a horny toad.

  4. Avitable

    Amanda, you’ve already had your porn allotment for today?

    Suebob, like fucking da Vinci!

    Poppy, the links are superfluous – you’re supposed to laugh at the painted porn!

    Mr. Fabulous, what type of comment is that?

    BPR, is that anything like your O face?

    Jay, you’re erect, aren’t you?

    Deb, that and the jizzplosion immediately preceding it.

    Karl, I know it when I see it!

    Nancycle, I think she’s been putting it to good use.

    Zom, “beat my dickable” is a good phrase.

    Martymankins, I cheated and used Photoshop

    Mik, no, just horny.

    Hilly, rawr.

    Iron Fist, it’s so fun to cheer!

    Winter, you think?

    Shamelessly Sassy, thanks! If you want to send me naked pictures of yourself, I can do the same to you.

    NYCWD, me too – just had one at the movie theater.

    Wayne, interactively nastified, eh?

    Been There, she’s clearly a star.

    Nat, I liked that one the best.

    Sandi, glad you liked it!

    Golfwidow, I think her look is one of disappointment.

    TrishK, what about the third guy? Is that me?

    Nobody, porn makes the world go ’round.

    Stephanie, holiday?

    Jen, exactly! I think of the parents when I do these things.

    Mindy, are you totally turned on now?

    Y not I, if only I had Adobe AfterEffects.

    Finn, I don’t know – she seems to like it. In fact, I think she wants it all over her face and chest.

    Robin, you’re talking about the engagement ring, right?

    Hello, it’s good for a Friday.

    Donnie, and paintingest.

    Maria, you ARE a horny toad!

    Dragon, flawless, isn’t it?

    Turnbaby, want me to do you next?

    Trukindog, well, I’m at work, and I did it when I was working!

    Ok Where Was I, a diamond fan, eh?

    BE Earl, I don’t know – given the quality of that porn, I think I made it better.

    Jeff, silly guys – what were they thinking?

    Ajooja, awesome! I love if I can help with involuntary urination!

  5. Sybil Law

    I looove your original art!! Seriously – that takes talent and imagination!
    Hahahahahahahahahaahahahaha
    Now I have to go click on the originals. I hope there’s some jizz shots!
    :woohoo:

  6. Sybil Law

    I do not have jizz.
    I seem to remember being promised some jizz, but never getting any jizz. I got jizz jipped. Or gyped. Shit.
    Whatever. My kid is gone and I am starting the party early tonight! Seriously – I am drinking tomorrow night with 2 alcoholics, so I have to build a tolerance tonight. Wish me luck!

  7. Hoatzin

    The baseball one is superb, well done!

    I was going to give it 2 Thumbs Up, but having looked at the originals, I think I’ll go wash my hands and just keep my thumbs to myself for a while.

  8. Shash

    I clicked over because of comment luv and the title of your post, but those “doctored images”? LOVE IT.

    Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to clean off the Iced Tea I spit all over my computer screen.

    Thanks for the laugh!

    S

  9. Avitable

    Grant, she looks Japanese.

    Poppy, Woopra!

    Sybil, have fun!

    Yoshi, it does have any number of options.

    Hoatzin, that’s probably a good idea.

    Killer, try using gay porn to make your own.

    Shash, thanks for the visit!

    Memarie, I think some of them look pretty disgusted generally.

  10. Bec

    I love ‘Will You Marry Me?’ the SFW one is so ‘you want me to put that tiny thing on my finger?’ And the only two words that need changing NSFW are on and finger.

    Beautiful artwork again!

  11. Michael

    There’s a lot of people who like porn, and a lot of people who don’t.

    I just say, whatever a man, and a woman, and another woman with a penis, and a midget, do to a donkey, is their own damn business.

    Amen? :sex011:

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