Survey says
I don't know what it is about this weekend, but my brain don't think too good. I saw this survey over at Steve's blog and decided to steal it. And I'm actually going to answer it seriously for once! I thought it had different questions than the typical tripe, so maybe it will make for less than shitty reading:
Who are you?
A selfish, hairy, sarcastic gorilla.
What's your Philosophy?
Love your friends and family unconditionally and despise everyone else equally.
First thoughts in the morning…
Today is going to kick ass.
Your current mood is…?
Cynical.
Where do you see yourself in 5 years…
Full-time millionaire blogger.
Your thoughts on ….
Life-
Some people deserve it. Some don't.
Love-
I love and fall in love with many things very easily.
Success-
I tie success very heavily into professional and financial freedom.
Happiness-
I'm always happy.
Death-
I have too many things to do first.
Fear-
I want the ability to instill fear in people easily.
Abortion
I don't believe I have the right to say anything – I am not a woman.
Why poverty exists?
I have very close friends and family members who are examples of people who pulled themselves out of a poverty-stricken environment, but for some people, it seems to be self-perpetuating.
The U.N-
I wish they had more power.
Wars- (by wars I mean wars in general)-
Although I understand their occasional necessity, I would never fight in one. I cannot understand believing in some random, intangible idea with such blind devotion that you'd trust in our military to keep you alive.
Suicide-
Suicide is selfish and lazy.
What is your favorite…
Author-
Stephen King – the Dark Tower series is an amazing opus.
Book-
IT, by Stephen King
Music Lyric-
Anything from "Piano Man", by Billy Joel
(Or from the Piano Man parody Fab sang about me!)
Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.
Quote about life–
Morality is not respectability. -George Bernard Shaw
Curse Word-
You stupid fuck.
Movie-
Grosse Pointe Blank
Movie quote-
"Hey, Biff. Get your damn hands off of her."
Final Random Thoughts…..
What would be the best job in the world?
For me? Owning a successful comic shop/cafe/movie theater.
And the worst job would be?
Anything in a corporate environment.
What is your biggest accomplishment to date?
My business.
What do you wish to accomplish in the next 5 years?
I want to grow my business until it is sold for a good value.
If you die tomorrow…
Who will speak at your funeral?
I wouldn't want one.
What would you like your eulogy to say?
"His milkshake brought everyone to the yard."
How would you hope to leave this world?
With advance notice.
Would you tell anyone you were going to die?
Only my wife and my best friend.
If you wrote a final letter to be read at your funeral what would it say…
I can't tell you. I'm writing my "death post", so I'd like it to be a surprise just in case.
Upon arriving at the pearly gates…what would God say to you?
"Hahaha, you've been punked. Bye now."
And finally..Your famous last words?
"What does this button do?"
What is a quick way to start a conversation?
Usually I just talk about the party in my pants.
And a quick way to end one??
Usually I just talk about the party in my pants.
Last words?
I'm exhausted.
Posted in 
Did today indeed kick ass?
Reply
Back to the Future is an AWESOME movie.
those are some mighty-fine answers. Can I pre-emptively borrow some cash in 5 years?
Reply
And thus concludes another episode of Inside The Bloggers Studio with your host, James Lipton.
The biggest change I would make is best Movie. While Grosse Pointe Blank is a fine movie, it does not compare with the epic beauty of Tremmors nor the greatest line ever: ""Hey ya'll! I found the ass end!"
Reply
surprisingly, none of these were really a surprise! not even the death post you will write in advance.
you make me giggle.
Reply
That is an awesome meme. I'm totally stealing it. Great answers.
Reply
I am amazed at how much I can respect you, I mean, the odds are against you and yet these answers speak volumes…
Reply
You are absolutely hairy and totaly sarcastic but I think not selfish – not from what I've seen. ;o)
Reply
Ya know, I'm sitting here thinking between some of the answers here, and your posts on your Dad's Birthday and the one on racism, and I think 'Wow, This *Tact is for Pussies* guy is really pretty cool."
And then I rmemember your posting of the video of Beastiality with a snake, and I say….."Awww well ok, 2 out of three ain't bad! :sex023:
I like this meme. I think I'll have to steal it. (You can keep the snake though!)
~ZZ
Reply
I loved The Dark Tower series … I loved every word of it, right up to the moment that he ruined the ending. :crying:
Reply
I am not afraid of you.
Reply
Back to the Future is one of the greatest movies of all time. Crispin Glover had the greatest nerd vibe ever. :thumbsup:
Reply
Your mention of Piano Man would have been a good place to put that parody I did for you.
Bastard.
Reply
You just did that to make my first comment look stupid.
Reply
How did you function before Britt?
Is she your best friend?
Reply
I might steal this.
Reply
You moved me Avi, I'm touched.
Reply
"Morality is not respectability. -George Bernard Shaw"
I love that. Perfect.
Reply
Amanda, well, Britt's back to work, so probably.
Whall, sure, but can I post-date the check?
Y2K, Tremors is indeed a classic.
Hello, giggle? Even with all of my serious posting?
Karl, yeah, it's a bit different from the usual crap.
Tori, respect me? Moi?
Penelope, oh, I'm totally selfish.
Greeneyezz, you never saw the dolphin blowjob video.
Cap, I loved the ending!
Britt, oh, sometimes I frighten you, and you even tell me that.
Lady Jaye, and Michael J. Fox is just so damn cute!
Fab, that is a brilliant idea.
Poppy, well, I had two salespeople who were half as efficient. And yes.
Golfwidow, I might charge you royalties.
Robin, touched in your no-no spot?
Finn, it is pretty apt for me.
Reply
Cool Back To The Future answers (hey, I'm not alone in my love for that movie).
And Grosse Point Blank was a great movie, and not because it starred John Cusack.
And no funeral for me. Celebration of Life. I want people to remember me being happy, not dressed in black sitting in a box.
Reply
No, what I tell you is that sometimes I am frightened by the fact that I can be FRIENDS with someone like you.
What SCARES me, is what that says about ME.
Reply
"Hey, Biff. Get your damn hands off of her."
:clap:
Reply
You are a good, good man. :heartbeat:
Reply
You're an interesting fellow, Avi
Reply
Both my No No and Yes Yes spots.
Reply
Dude, I would write you a kick ass eulogy. :dance:
Reply
I just realized that the "milkshake" quote/answer from this Sunday's contest is probably not from "There Will Be Blood". Damn!
Reply
Dude? You won't let me speak at your funeral? Seriously? Not even if we had a drunken Irish-wake type of thing? With lots of coconut rum?
*Yes, I would totally use your death as a pitiful excuse to drink my new, fave alky bev.*
*Yes, that was a stupid abbreviation.*
Yep, I'm gonna have to steal this one at some point.
Reply
I love to laugh + You make me laugh = I love you, you hairy gorilla person.
Reply
This has an underlying layer of sweetness about it that has brought a tear to my eye. I shall echo Karl – Great answers.
Reply
Your "milkshake eulogy" comment had me cracking up.
Reply
Milkshake to the yard. . . made me laugh out loud. Good answers.
Reply
I see we share the same philosophy.
Except that I don't necessarily like all my family (we weren't including aunts and cousins and stuff, were we?) and I don't really have many friends.
But despising everyone else equally? I'm all about equality.
Reply
::perk::
did someone say party in pants?
Invited?
Reply
Okay, if we're both still blogging when you die (well, you won't be anymore but you know what I mean), I'm totally going to put a post up in your honor with the milkshake quote.
Reply
Marty, BTTF is one of my favorite trilogies.
Britt, not just friends, but friends with boob benefits!
AmyD, love that scene!
Sybil, I don't know why you're saying that!
Dragon, how's that now?
Robin, sweet.
Tracy, would there be lots of cursing?
BE Earl, actually, it is.
CMG, only if you did it naked.
BTDT, I love me, too!
Bec, that sweetness is nougat.
Amber, I think it would be appropriate.
BBM, well, it's true.
Stacey, I don't like all of my family, either. But I do have lots of friends.
Steph, of course you're invited!
BB, sounds like a deal.
Reply
Beneath that tough, cynical, ape-like exterior you're quite a thoughtful man inside.
Reply
Piano Man is awesome!
Reply
Dragon, nah, I'm a selfish bastard, and don't you forget about it?
Lynda, one of my favorite songs.
Reply
Gotta say you gave some pretty good answers. I'm jealous. I wonder if some of my answers would change after hearing some of yours.
Reply
Crunchy, you're the king of the douchebags.
Reply
Crunchy – sucks at life.
I say that because you are just a good, good man. Smart, funny, you make me laugh, and deep down you are sweet.
:batting:
Reply
Sybil, I'm not sweet. I'm really not!
Reply
Okay – so deep down you're very KIND. Is that better?!
Oh – and I got my nutcracker today, and the condoms!!!
WOOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUCK YEAH (to borrow from Miss Britt)!!!!!!
I can't wait to post about it but who knows when that'll be thanks to my crap computer!
But thanks! LOVE THEM.
My husband also thanks you. You didn't poke any holes in those things, did you?
Haha :sex003:
Reply
Sybil, I'm glad you liked them!
Reply