So today was a snow day. Mrs. Cris gets up and makes coffee and the house fills with the smell of bacon. Mrs. Cris is NOT known for her domestic skills, so this is a real treat. In fact, I can't resist going in the kitchen and swiping a small thin (almost translucent) strip of bacon to try out.
Immediately my mouth is filled with bacony goodness but soon the flavor turns all wrong. The texture is not right and I can't even seem to bite through it. Finally it grows so nasty I gag and pull it out of my mouth like a sword swallower in the circus. That's when we realized my dainty lil Miss Homemaker had fried up a package of bacon for the family… and fried a strip of the plastic package while she was at it! Yup, I had a mouth full of bacon flavored plastic toxins. I will probably be dead by morning.
MORE meat? you are trying to kill me, eh?
Reply
are you fucking kidding me? i was first?
woot!
Reply
there's bacon floating before my very eyes!!
Reply
That's awesome! I licked my screen!
Reply
But I'm a vegetarian and can't enjoy it!
Reply
That seems to be the fix for everything lately…
Reply
Howzabout some eggs and grits to go along with that? Or some bourbon.
Reply
Yep. That's what it needed.
Reply
So today was a snow day. Mrs. Cris gets up and makes coffee and the house fills with the smell of bacon. Mrs. Cris is NOT known for her domestic skills, so this is a real treat. In fact, I can't resist going in the kitchen and swiping a small thin (almost translucent) strip of bacon to try out.
Immediately my mouth is filled with bacony goodness but soon the flavor turns all wrong. The texture is not right and I can't even seem to bite through it. Finally it grows so nasty I gag and pull it out of my mouth like a sword swallower in the circus. That's when we realized my dainty lil Miss Homemaker had fried up a package of bacon for the family… and fried a strip of the plastic package while she was at it! Yup, I had a mouth full of bacon flavored plastic toxins. I will probably be dead by morning.
Reply
more cowbell
Reply
NOW i'm hungry. damn you.
Reply
Oh great internet gods…please make my computer screen scratch and sniff…right now!
Reply
What, does no one outside of the UK know how to cook striped pig?
Juices baby, other than grease, barely dead animals are the best.
Except of burgers, as picture, for burgers.
MEAT
Reply
Can I drape it over my face and run around screaming "Silence of the Lambs!!!"
Reply
Bacon,bacon, BACON!!!
Reply
Don't you know pigs are filthy animals? They eat, and root, and shit. That's a filthy animal.
Reply
Bacon must be crispy in order to be edible. Cracklin is optional.
Reply
I don't get it.
Reply
OH! I get it now. For whatever reason the first time I clicked the link just a regular 404 showed up.
I hope that's maple glazed bacon.
Yum.
Reply
Damn you.. now I need to go find bacon this morning for breakfast.
Reply
I am a vage aterian. But I do like my bacon. And it really finished your site. :sex023:
Reply
I watched How It's Made: Bacon yesterday. Thought you might like it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ucu8TuFjebg
Reply
Great. I'm fasting today. Thanks.
Reply
Bacon makes everything better (except chocolate).
Reply
Seriously?
Reply
Mmmmmmmm….bacon.
Reply
Father Muskrat, what if he was a charming mother fuckin' pig? I mean ten times more charmin' than that Arnold on Green Acres.
Reply
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. :sex023:
And obviously you're in a food coma and can't post. I get it.
Reply
Oh and I'd also like to point out that chickens eat their own shit all the time, so they're just as nasty as pigs.
Reply
Do you eat bacon with your fingers?
Reply
The meat of the Gods.
Reply
Bacon?
:puke:
Reply
Um…okay? Really? You have issues, darling. I love bacon as much as the next person…but, WTF?
<~Try to remember that I am on a diet, fucker.
Reply
P.S. I TOTALLY cheated and started reading the comments, because I was afraid to click the link and be taken to a picture of your bacon-wrapped penis.
Reply
I think my arteries just instantly clogged. Thanks, dude.
Reply
You are clearly retarded!!!
In a good way though!!!
I like bacon and i don't even eat meat!!!!
Reply
Can I add cheesecake to my bacon?
Reply