The One Where I …
- Pose for Playgirl
- Talk about my divorce 2 3
- Review sex toys
- Horrify you with my Aristocrats joke
- Discuss my weight loss
- Prove I'm an expert 2 3
- Show you my balls
- Interview my dead grandmother
- Want to have a child
- Go on my first date as a divorced man
- Teach you about dirty talk
- Go to a strip club for the first time
- Talk to a heroin addict
- Discuss auto-erotica
- Console a grieving mother
- Write a letter to my body
- Review my life lessons
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- Andy Rooney
- Steve Jobs
- Amy Winehouse
- Leonard Stern, creator of Mad Libs
- Jack Kevorkian
- Randy "Macho Man" Savage
- Osama bin Laden
- Elizabeth Taylor
- Jack LaLanne
- Leslie Nielsen
- Bob Guccione
- Barbara Billingsley
- Tony Curtis
- Dennis Hopper
- Gary Coleman
- Chinese murderer**
- Casey, aka Moosh In Indy*
- Adolf Hitler
- Peter Graves
- Corey Haim
- My Grandmother**
- Roy Scheider
- Zelda Rubinstein, J.D. Salinger
- Brittany Murphy
- Oral Roberts
- John Lennon
- Ken Ober
- Henry Gibson
- Patrick Swayze
- Ted Kennedy
- John Hughes
- Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett
- Walter Cronkite
- Billy Mays
- Ed McMahon
- Stephen Hawking*
- Robert Novak
- Caylee Anthony
- David Carradine
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Monthly Archives: January 2009
People are greedy, obnoxious, and retarded
Freecycle is a site with a good idea. Rather than throw away things, adding to landfills and just making the trash situation worse, why not see if someone needs it first? Using a simple mailing list for each community, people … Continue reading
Nobody expects the Snackiepoo Inquisition
As part of that whole interview meme, I was asked 5 questions by Hilly. I still have another 20 or so people to whom I need to send interview questions, so be patient. I’m working on it, fuckers. As a … Continue reading
Playing with my new toy
Direct link. I’m just taking a minute to play with my new Bamboo Fun Wacom tablet that I got for Christmas. Well, I got something else for Christmas that I returned, got a credit, and then got this.
The Baddest Muthafaiqa Around
There once was a chick named Faiqa, It’s very hard not to immediately lika, She’s smart and sassy And snooty and classy And would have preferred this to be a haika It’s very unusual for a blogger to show up … Continue reading
Posted in Bloggers
Tagged avitable, birthday, comedy, faiqa, happy birthday, humor, native-born
22 Comments
Wonder Boner
It’s old, but it makes me laugh.
Hate me
You may hate me, because this? This is my commute. ****************** In other Avita-news: Tonight (that’s Wednesday night for you maroons out there) is a brand new installment of “Clearly, You’re Retarded”! Tonight’s episode is all about friendship. What makes … Continue reading
Early retirement
On January 26th, 1977, a momentous occasion occurred that forever altered the course of the world. That event, of course, would be my birth. In 20 days, I’m going to be 32. That only gives me three years until I … Continue reading
I support my local economy!
Yesterday, I mentioned that we’re looking at our bills and budget for 2009. Typically, we don’t pay too much attention to that type of stuff (yeah, I know, really smart, right?), but with the economy slowdown, it seemed like a … Continue reading
Magaziniac
I think it might be time for us to reassess our magazine subscriptions. In looking at our bills and budget for the year, I compiled a complete list of all magazines to which we subscribe: Entertainment Weekly Maxim* Playboy MAD … Continue reading








