You know you're a Redneck Mommy when
The Redneck Mommy, aka Tanis, brought home her son on Thursday and some of her closest friends are throwing her a Redneck Shower! They sent out a large email to her friends and readers and asked each of us to write a quick blog post by today that shows how we are also a redneck mommy (or daddy).
Since I don't have kids, I decided to showcase my redneck parenting in relation to Jigsaw, our dog. Because she really is our kid when it boils down to it.
You know you're a redneck daddy when . . .
You accompany your dog to the backyard, in your underwear, and pee in the grass alongside her.
Instead of buying her toys, you just pick up random cardboard boxes to bring home.
She's inherited your distaste for vegetables and your love for fried food.
Are you a redneck mommy or daddy? Leave your examples in the comments.
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You know you're a redneck mommy when you type something just so you can be the first one to comment on Avitable's blog.
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I don't have kids, but have pugs. And I'm certainly a redneck daddy, because I buy one big ice-cream cone at the drive-in and my wife and I share it with the doggies.
Congratulations to Tanis on fooling the suits and adding another little mouth to the table. Woot!
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Instead of buying her toys, you just pick up random cardboard boxes to bring home.
Yep. Though I have a cat, and they're really not that picky.
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You know you're a redneck mommy when you let you cat lick you "clean" and that counts as your shower for the day.
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…and when you misspell "your" as "you". *giggle*
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You know you're a redneck mommy when you let your kid eat Pringles for breakfast.
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when you flip a dirty tee shirt inside out and send the kid to school.
when you put two slices of bread together with nothing inside and pass it off as school lunch. :loser:
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Hmm… I don't think I'm terribly rednecky.
Still..
You know you're a redneck mommy when your kid can somehow do some bootylicious dance. (I really wish I had video of this. I did not teach her.)
Oh! I know! This just happened – David Hasselhoff was on Sponge Bob…
You know you're a redneck mommy when your 7 year old daughter says, "David Hasselhoff is hot!"!
Ugh.
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You know you're a redneck mommy who is married to a redneck daddy when you walk through the den and he is in his underwear watching NASCAR, and you glance at the tv and see two cars almost on top of each other and yell, "The 14's drafting all the air off the 48's ass.." or "The 18's getting no aero push with that big rub on his left side." and it totally makes sense to both of you.
Or something. :loser: :dunce:
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I did the backyard peeing thing with two dogs *and* a son.
What? I was potty training him.
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… when you let your kid walk out the door to school wearing camo pants and a red t-shirt. Ummm yeah, guilty.
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You know you're a Redneck Daddy, when rather than throw out the collected empty toilet roll tubes in the bathroom like the wife asks, you throw them in the rabbit cage for Max to chew on.
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I knew I was a Redneck Daddy when I had my first son and grandson by the same woman on the same day.
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I will never get the image of you in your underwear peeing in your back yard next to your dog, out of my head.
Thanks for that dude.
And thank you so much for helping celebrate my new son.
You rock and you are by far the best find I made in 2008.
Smooches.
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BTDT, that's not redneck. That's intelligence.
Dick, you share ice cream with your dogs? Okay, that's too much for me!
Kathy, I like playing in boxes too.
Poppy, does Georgie know how to put deodorant on you?
Leanne, well, it's like toast.
Metalmom, air sandwiches are good.
Sybil, that's pretty rednecky!
Stephanie, I think you win.
Whall, it's nice to pee in the backyard.
Tiffany, not sure if that's rednecky or just fashion blindness.
Mik, works for me!
Muskrat, I'm so confused.
Redneck Mommy, you meant best "fiend", right?
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We don't have a dog, but my husband will go pee in the backyard sometimes if it is Summer time and beer is involved.
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