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Stick your LOL up your ROTFLMAO

My wife isn’t what I would call an early adopter of technology. I just recently turned on text messaging on her cell so that I could send her a quick message if I can’t reach her at work, and it’s been a source of frustration and confusion. Most acronyms that I take for granted because I see them regularly are not exactly obvious to her.

“What’s ROFLTAMO?”
“Oh, you mean ROTFLMAO. It means “Rolling On The Floor Laughing My Ass Off.”
“That’s stupid. Nobody actually does that.”

She’s right. Do people actually LOL? Sure. But the rest of it has turned into hyperbole, just along with that cliche of someone saying they did a spittake or had liquid come out of their nose.

So I’ve decided to come up with some new acronyms to represent a more honest and better, wiser Internet.

IMWITT: I’m Masturbating While I Type This
RMEAYS: Rolling My Eyes At Your Stupidity
SHY: Secretly Hating You
IANADBIPOO: I Am Not A Doctor But I Play One Online
IANALBIPOO: I Am Not A Lawyer But I Play One Online
IGOOSS: I Get Outraged Over Stupid Shit
IKIAHB: I Know I’m A Hypocrite But…
IKIADB: I Know I’m A Douchebag But…
YAFDQ: You’re A Fucking Drama Queen
AMCDTB: A Monkey Could Do That Better
TITBAYG: This Is The Best Apology You’ll Get
IDYBYF: Yes I’m Dyslexic But Fuck You
TFBAGNA: Thanks For Being A Grammar Nazi, Asshole
CETIHNWTA: Commenting Even Though I Have Nothing Worthwhile To Add
WISILYIL: When I Said I Liked You, I Lied
IBTBDIAAW: I Blog, Therefore By Default I Am A Writer
IHWYHI: I’ll Hate Whoever You Hate Indiscriminately

and finally:

ITLAOSTATOTWINTS: I’m Too Lazy And/Or Stupid To Actually Type Out The Words I Want To Say

Do you have any new acronyms to add to the ever-growing lexicon of the lazy dictionary?

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46 Replies to “Stick your LOL up your ROTFLMAO”

  1. Sybil Law

    I LOATHE acronyms!!
    ILA. There’s my acronym.
    YMO – You misspelled one
    (on these two: IANADBIPOO & IANALBIPOO)
    (actually, you just left off the e).
    I seriously hate texting, and can’t stand abbreviating words, so I just. won’t. do. it.
    I have to say, though – yours make me LOL!! :lmao:

  2. Jess

    Man. I so had no idea that I was such an idiot. I’m sure that should now be ISHNITIWSAI. But what a fuck time that would be. I would much rather say Hi. I burned my hand today. It sucked.


  3. hello haha narf

    oh man, i do the CETIHNWTA thing all the time, otherwise some folks would never know that i was there. and also i do it so that i don’t say something stupid or so that i can say i was there without getting into a fight in the comments about a political discussion.

  4. Faiqa

    TISMDOFTIBTSWFIHTSS – “This is my day off from the Internet, but that shit was funny, I had to say something.”

    Acronyms are convenient, not necessarily always lazy! Still, I know *some* geeks like to walk around saying , “National Aeronautics and Space Administration,” “Internal Revenue Service,” “Experimental Prototype Community of the Future” and “Federal Income Contributions Act” instead of the acronyms in attempts to reiterate how smart they think they are.

    So I can see where *you’re* coming from. :dance:

  5. Cambria

    Two acronyms come to mind immediately — WIARYAMKABTHOOEO (While I am reading your acronyms my kids are beating the hell out of each other)and WTHITSB (Where the hell is that school bus).

  6. Miss Britt

    LMAOAF – which is, Laughing My Ass Off At Faiqa.

    And what the fuck is WRONG with you people that you do not actually LOL??? I laugh out loud. All the time! When I read shit!

    For example?

    IGOOSS: I Get Outraged Over Stupid Shit

    made me LOL.

    Y’all are a bunch of grumpy fucks.

  7. Dawn

    Hahaha… those are pretty good, avitable. I’ve been on the internet long enough that “lol” should just roll right off my fingers because quite frequently I do laugh out loud, but something about “lol” bugs the fucking shit out of me so instead I “hahaha”… which is probably just as stupid… but what can you do?

  8. Avitable

    Maria, but we all love YMFBA!

    Ashleigh, that is a good one. And I know that Britt will literally laugh out loud as she reads something. Most people don’t, though.

    Sybil, thanks.

    UTBM, I think I’ll definitely use that one.

    Walking With Scissors, nice usage!

    BE Earl, hah! Nice one.

    Jess, I’m sorry you burned your hand. WYLMTEOT? Would you like me to ejaculate on that?

    BPR, you have to tell me what it means too!

    Squeaky Wheel, hehehehe. Your second comment actually made me LOL, so nice job.

    SPD, WTFIATA indeed.

    Hello, so see? Now you can just stick that in there.

    Crys, someone who is on the forefront.

    Faiqa, oh yeah, I forgot about your stupid “I don’t use Internet on Mondays” thing. And, by the way, I did not say that you had to say what EPCOT stood for – I just explained that it was an acronym, which is why it used to be in all caps. And you fucked up the acronym in your comment. 😛

    NYCWD, I think I’ll start using that with Britt.

    Cambria, hahahahhah! Acronyms for real life work too!

    Turnbaby, grrr.

    Grant, smiling inwardly works for me. I was hoping someone would notice it.

    Metalmom, that’s a good one!

    Britt, and you’re a shining light of holiness and beauty.

    Bossy, I bet Bossy’s floor is sparkling clean.

    Dawn, I alternate between “heh” and “hah” because I hate using “LOL”.

    Kiefer and Emo, that’s a great classic one.

    Finn, me too!

  9. Jay

    I’ve been trying to mix up using haha, hehe and LOL. Depends on how funny something is.

    I had someone who was using text speak and acronyms when she commented on my blog for a while. I thought it was really annoying but never said anything cause SWHAH (she was hot as hell).

  10. Lynda

    I don’t mind a few acronyms, but when a whole sentence is filled with them, I feel like I need a manual to figure out what they are.

    “TFBAGNA: Thanks For Being A Grammar Nazi, Asshole” is my favorite on your list, and I’m totally going to start using it.

  11. Stacey

    I may have to adopt RMEAYS.

    A couple days ago one of my coworkers asked “What does TYR mean? Like, ‘Ok, I’ll tyr!’ Is that some kind of acronym?” Of course, I had no idea. Eventually she decided to just ask the guy who typed it and risk looking stupid. Turns out he meant TRY, he just can’t type.

  12. Avitable

    Popping Bubbles, I agree. I hate that shit with a passion. There we go – IHTS!

    Jay, yeah, me too.

    Hilly, what does that mean? Rolling My Eyes Something Something?

    Fiwa, well, STFU is a well known one too.

    Robin, what’s that stand for?

    Clown, thanks for nothing, fucker.

    Jess, I charge $45 an ounce.

    Lynda, it’s all yours!

    Stacey, hahhaha. That’s great.

  13. Mari

    Worse than the dreaded LOL is the lololololol idiot. Did your laugh turn into a donkey’s bray? :banghead:
    I think I’m going to start using RMEAYS and YAFDQ, they’ll look great next to PCW (post count whore) on some of the boards I frequent. :clap:

  14. Elizabeth Kaylene

    “ITLAOSTATOTWINTS” is how I feel about most of those stupid acronyms. I’ll use them occasionally, but only when I really mean it. Otherwise, I prefer “ha ha ha” to “lol” or “lawl” or “omfgrotflmao.” I’m really just not a fan of acronyms. But IMWITT made me lmao.

  15. Avitable

    Mari, PCW is a definite necessity for a messageboard.

    Whall, how about YIADP. Or Yay! It’s A DITL Post!

    Elizabeth, well, to be honest, IMWITT.

    Stephanie, BMA is a great one.

    Muskrat, or AYT? Are you twelve?

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