I’ve reviewed a Blowjob Imitator and a Prostate Massager. I’m kicking off June with a video review of a new sex toy from the same online adult store, Eden Fantasys.
Pamela the Luscious Love Doll from Adam Avitable on Vimeo.
If your idea of sexy is rubbing your throbbing purple warrior all over the inflatable raft that you have floating in the pool, then you should buy this toy. Otherwise, save your money and just invest in some nice hand lotion so your hand feels all silky and smooth. This toy is really only worthwhile if you’re buying it as a gag gift for a friend or during a bachelor party.
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In other Avita-news, today is the 25th birthday of the 25th birthday for our very own Turnbaby. Go wish her a happy one, sugar! Enjoy this post? Try these:
Massaging your prostate for fun and profit
A letter in Canadian for @redneckmommy
The time that passes
Twitter: chrissi_johnson
says:
Oh MY.. Hysterical.
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@Chrissi, and sexy.
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seems like someone would buy one of those silicone naughty bits before a blow up doll.
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@liquid, hopefully. If they were smart.
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haha the ending was a shocker!
If I were a man, I’d skip that shit and dish out for a Fleshlight I think. They seem pretty popular!
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@Breigh, well, the blowjob imitator is just like a Fleshlight, and it’s pretty creepy.
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I’m guessing you would have to be desperate and a bit sad to buy and use one of those.
btw the wife was playing this video on her computer and mentioned you look like you’ve lost weight.
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@Mik, must be a trick of the camera.
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:jerkoff2:
The first thought I had was …..are you going to open the door for the cops with your lovely gf in hand?
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@Starfish, I should have. Now that would have been fun.
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Twitter: _scifidad_
says:
When you flipped her over, the first thing I thought was, “Just how many invitations has that anus sent out already? It looks prolapsed.” And then you agreed.
Also? No money shot at the end? What is this, the Playboy Channel?
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@SciFi Dad, we only do softcore here at http://www.NakedAvitable.com.
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That watermelon thing doesn’t sound any more inviting so I take your expert word on it.
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@always home and uncool, give it a shot and let me know what you think.
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Twitter: hellohahanarf
says:
when i think of silky “i don’t think of this type of shit” cracked me up.
love the ending.
terrific review, mr. avitable.
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@hello haha narf, I was so totally going to say that…the hair thing.
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@hello haha narf, thank you, mz becky.
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Loving Lips and Prolapse was hilarious!
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@Valerie, talk about no truth in advertising!
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Woa, Avitable has a semi-stalker? That was really crazy and random.
Smooth, perfumed skin! I can’t believe they put THAT in THAT box. LMFAO, ha ha ha!
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@cat, this guy was just mad that I didn’t like President Bush, I think.
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:lmao:
Excellent. I especially enjoyed the ending!!
:lmao:
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@Sybil Law, I’m sure you did!
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Twitter: LeSombre
says:
That was scary.
Well done!
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@LeSombre, did your hair turn gray?
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I always wondered if anyone actually tried to used those things for arousal. I’ve only seen them used as gags.
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@Grant, yeah, same here.
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Twitter: missbritt
says:
Someone else followed you home? You have GOT to learn how to drive.
Did you get the wrong product?!?! Wow.
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@Miss Britt, I got the right product, which is even worse. And this time I think it had to do with my anti-Bush bumper sticker.
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Twitter: VerdantDude
says:
“throbbing purple warrior”
Nice.
Sounds like one of those Dear Penthouse letters from back in the day. Or does Penthouse still publish/write those? I haven’t seen a Penthouse in about twenty years.
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@B.E. Earl, I think they probably still have the Penthouse Forum, but I haven’t read one since college.
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Thanks for the birthday shout out –I think
:sexytime:
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@Turnbaby, happy birthday!
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Twitter: hismuse
says:
Uhmmm…that’s the last video I watch of your at work. That’s all I’m sayin :boobs4:
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@Robin, there was no nudity in the whole thing! Totally SFW.
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Twitter: hismuse
, June 1st, 2009: 2:15 PM
@Avitable, Oh I know, but if my boss had walked by I would have had a talking to…I get in enough trouble from my cleavage.
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But your hand can’t snuggle you quite the way an inflatable woman can. And you can strap her into the passenger seat of your car to use the carpool lane!
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@Miss Grace, plus, road head in the carpool lane.
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Wait wait wait, let’s here more about the police and someone following you home? What did you do, cut someone off in traffic like a crazy man?
Or were they enamored by your good looks?
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@Hilly, they were drunk and mad about my anti-Bush bumper sticker.
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Twitter: coalminersgd
says:
OK. First?
YOU HAD A STALKER YESTERDAY?!? Holy crap. I’m so very sorry, hon and I’m glad you’re OK.
Second?
FUCK A WATERMELON?!? I want a how-to video on this. Seriously.
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@Coal Miner’s Granddaughter, here are the instructions about the watermelon: http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/index.html
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Twitter: Jayman3768
says:
“She has seams all over” .. Just like Tara Reid.
Is she standing in the corner of your office now? Or lying face down in the pool?
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@Jay, she has been deflated and is in a box somewhere.
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Remember when Randy Savage did commercials for Slim Jims? That guy was crazy!
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@Clown, he really liked Slim Jims.
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Oh. My. God. I’m cancelling my order RIGHT NOW. You’re right… she looks nothing like the box.
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@Undomestic Diva, I know you’re disappointed. Someday your princess will come.
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Twitter: blondefabulous
says:
HHH used to sell those when he worked at a hot shop in Memphis. He said they were purchased exclusively by guys playing pranks on their friends, guys getting props for a bachelor party, or geeky WoW nerds who couldn’t get a real live woman to save their lives!
5 will get you 10 the WoW nerds dressed it up like some elven mage princess or some other shit like that!
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@Blondefabulous, or an accountant. WoW fans love accountants.
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Twitter: mrlady
says:
Remind me to never ask you if you think anything of mine is inviting. Ever. EVER.
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@Mr Lady, I was just going to tell you that you too have an inviting anus.
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Twitter: mrlady
says:
Also, watermelon?
WATERMELON?
Baby, we gots to get you a hobby. That doesn’t involve watermelon.
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@Mr Lady, I’ve never tried the watermelon trick but I have heard about it.
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@Avitable, yeah yeah, that’s what they all say.
So, I had to play that ending for my Mr. and then I remembered we have a watermelon out in our garage. He claims he wasn’t even considering it, but I was horrified to note that he had NOT gotten that “I just saw someone get someone else’s vomit in their mouth” look that I know was on my own face.
Also… heh heh.. heh.. heh heh… you said prolapsed.
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Twitter: msmegan
says:
That anus apparently invited the whole neighborhood.
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@Finn, apparently! Damn anus with no sense of decorum.
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Twitter: poppycede
says:
Your hair looks so fluffy!
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@Poppy, driving with the windows down will do that!
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Twitter: nycwatchdog
says:
It’s a hooman love doll.
I have no interest.
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@NYCWD, the inflatable dolphin sex doll review is next week.
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My sister could pass for that doll.
Seriously.
Prolapsed anus and silky bald headed woman.
She’s hot yo.
And she’s single.
Better than a watermelon. Just sayin’.
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@Redneck Mommy, she doesn’t really sound better than a watermelon, though.
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Twitter: sendchocolate
says:
I am sitting here laughing over the box vs. well, “box.” So funny I had to go and call my husband over to watch it.
That shit sells itself. It really does.
And we need to change the definition of “inviting.” No eVites for you!
t.
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@Tina@SendChocolate, well, to be fair I was only trying to determine what the manufacturers determined was “inviting”.
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