Yesterday, a friend went home. After almost a year here, Hilly is driving back to California, another chapter in her life over.
A year or two ago, I argued that you can’t learn something from everyone. I think I’ve grown a bit as a person since then, and I’m not ashamed to admit that maybe I was wrong. (Although, nobody tell her. She’ll be insufferable.) I revise my earlier opinion to say that you should always be able to take something away from your interaction with any person. And Hilly’s just not any person – she’s a force to be reckoned with. I’m going to miss her, and I hope that the next leg of journey gives her some of the happiness and deep deep dicking towards which she’s been striving. In the meantime, all I have to remember her are the things I’ve learned (well, that and all the household stuff she gave me and the mattress and box spring):
- The word “douche” is very versatile and can be used in any capacity. For example, you could say “That douchetastic douchey douchecock needs to go douche his motherdouchin’ ass.”
- When you have people who are important to you, you can love them without having to defend every thing they do.
- Life is America.
- It takes buckets of strength to live alone for the first time in many years without falling apart.
- Splash Mountain should be ridden over and over again.
- There is a right way and a wrong way to take a photo of yourself.
- The sound of a vibrator will bring your cat running.
- There’s no such thing as too far to drive for a good sandwich.
- You can be almost 40 and have the heart and soul of a 20 year old.
- Everything in California is more awesome than anything in shitty Florida. (Except the economy and earthquakes, but shhhh. Oh, and of course, me and Britt and Faiqa.)
- You know it’s funny when someone snorts.
Things I learned at Universal Studios
Things I learned while in Vermont
Five by five: Things you don’t know, things I do, and what I believe
Twitter: Faiqa
says:
Just the other day, my brother chastised me about how I couldn’t get a sentence out without employing some version of the word “douche.” Thank you, Hilly, that was all you, disco lady.
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@Faiqa, she’s a giver. /for douches
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Twitter: karlerikson
says:
She’ll be missed, but it gives me reason to get to California.
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@Karl, this is true.
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Twitter: VerdantDude
says:
“There’s no such thing as too far to drive for a good sandwich.”
That’s a smart woman right there.
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@B.E. Earl, I think it should be my new life philosophy.
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She has a strength that inspires many of us ! : )
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@Kim, especially in arm wrestling!
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I actually already knew about the Splash Mountain and the vibrator/cat connection (well, not me personally, but my… well, err… you know… shit!)
And if you are talking about Earl of Sandwich, well, I have yet to experience that.
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@martymankins, next time you’re in Vegas or Orlando, give it a shot. Best sandwiches I’ve ever eaten.
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Twitter: ellemmes
says:
Gigglesnorts are awesome and definitely the yardstick by which funny should be measured.
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@Lisa, exactly!
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Ooh I especially like the one about “almost being 40″
Heh…
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@DutchBitch, I couldn’t let her slide too much!
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Twitter: missbritt
says:
*sniff*
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@Miss Britt, yeah.
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Twitter: hismuse
says:
One can learn a lot from her it seems, she should teach her wisdom all over the world.
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@Robin, well, yes, but since life is America, there’s no point to traveling.
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Twitter: bobutler
says:
This post is not unlike Ferris Bueller’s Day Off: It seems to be about Ferris (Hilly), but really it’s about Cameron (Adam).
So who was it that finally taught you that you can learn from people?
Also: It takes buckets of strength to admit you were wrong. And to push your dad’s Ferrari through the window.
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@bo, a certain unnamed blonde blogging rockstar who is The Light.
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Twitter: hellohahanarf
says:
i don’t understand this one: Life is America.
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@hello haha narf, none of understand it, yet it seems to make perfect sense.
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Hilly is awesome. It even makes ME sad she’s leaving, and I don’t live in Florida!!!
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@Sybil Law, it is indeed a sad day for the East Coast.
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Twitter: msmegan
says:
Life IS America. I totally get it. And Hilly would totally get that I get it.
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@Finn, yup!
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Twitter: nycwatchdog
says:
Isn’t it amazing how one person can effect our vernacular so acutely?
I totally felt like a douchehose as a tear rolled down my eye while reading this. I’m all doucheklmept now.
You can chatdouche amongst yourselves now…
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@NYCWD, douchey douche douche.
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I would love to know the right way and the wrong way to take a picture of yourself. Wait, no. I don’t need to know the wrong way. That’s the way I do it EVERY time.
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@lydia, I only know how, but Hilly is the master and instructor.
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These are all good things to learn
and, of course, being a California girl myself (now living in the midwest) indeed everything in CA is just a bit better
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@christie, especially the traffic and pollution!
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Twitter: themuskrat
says:
My dog comes running when I open a jar of peanut butter. Draw your own conclusions.
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@muskrat, I conclude that you spread it on your taint.
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Twitter: themuskrat
, February 23rd, 2010: 12:18 PM
@Avitable, exactly!
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Love. You are totally feeding my budding Hilly girl-crush, dude. When I grow up, I wanna be just like her.
Although this Canadian is a little “nuh-uh” about the whole “Life is America” thing.
*snort*
xo
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@Nenette, America can mean North America, yanno?
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Twitter: Temptingsam
says:
I wholeheartedly agree with: When you have people who are important to you, you can love them without having to defend every thing they do. but this? Life is America. Duuude? If you said North America, then maybe…
Wishing Hilly a safe trip home.
Wishing you the buckets of strength. Douchebag.
XOX
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@sam {temptingmama}, America/North America, what’s the diff?
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Twitter: VDog
says:
Snorting is ALWAYS good.
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@VDog, totes.
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I don’t know Hilly, but I know Adam. I will trust his judgement on this one.
And buckets of strength brother, buckets.
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@Corey, thanks!
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Twitter: poppycede
says:
“It takes buckets of strength to live alone for the first time in many years without falling apart.”
I guess you could have learned this from me if I’d been more verbal during that time. hmm.
Glad that Hilly leaves such a positive impact on you.
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Adam, thank you so much for these awesome things! I love that you have taken somethhing from me because I think that we all do whenever someone comes into our lives. I know that I have many things I’ve learned from knowing you as well.
Also, 38 is NOT almost 40, douchebag. Well, technically but man, what the fish?
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Oh also, to all of my Canadian friends (and Becky)…the term Life is America is not about me thinking that America is the meaning of life…uh, mostly. I was talking about being free to do whatever I want because you know, I’m grown and how I embrace that freedom and diversity and and…America is freedom and diversity. Therefore, life is America! See? It’s an adjective!
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Twitter: themuskrat
, February 23rd, 2010: 12:19 PM
@Hilly, I like it.
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Twitter: elizabethbarone
says:
Ah, Hilly, I overuse the word “douche” myself. It’s a brilliant addition to the English vocabulary. That and “fuck.” Life is incomplete without those two.
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Twitter: coalminersgd
says:
I totally felt a disturbance in The Force when Hilly left the East Coast. *Sniff*
Awesomely sweet post, hon!
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