One of my favoritest people in the whole world, Casey, aka Mooshinindy, turns the ripe old age of 28 today! And I thought what better present could I give her other than something that I usually only reserve for dead celebrities? So I sat down yesterday and interviewed Casey and here you go!*
ME: Hi Casey, happy birthday!
MOOSH: Thanks! I’m happy to be here.
ME: So, people are always surprised when they find out that we’re friends, aren’t they?
MOOSH: Why? Because I’m a pure, innocent Mormon who’s one of God’s creatures and you’re swinging on the door to hell?
ME: Exactly.
MOOSH: Well, I just tell people that I’m trying to save you.
ME: From? Tigers?
MOOSH: No, your soul!
ME: Ahh. But I believe in Jesus!
MOOSH: Adam, you named your penis Jesus.
ME: And I believe in him!
MOOSH: Sigh. I wonder if lightning can strike through an Internet connection. Am I also in danger here?
ME: No. Jesus will protect you.
MOOSH: What did we say? No more talking about your penis when you talk to the Mormon girl!
ME: I’m totally going to put this whole conversation on the Internet.
MOOSH: I will fucking kill you.
ME: Aha! You can’t reach me through the Internet!
MOOSH: Oh, but don’t you know about us Mormons? We’re everywhere.
ME: Oh shit.
MOOSH: You get some random knock on your door and there are two clean cut young men standing there in white shirts and ties. You smile and start to tell them you’re not interested and shut the door, but one of them sticks their foot in. You open it, confused, and then they beat you in the face with their Bibles.
ME: Please don’t sic the Mormon Attack Squad on me!
MOOSH: Promise you won’t post this anywhere.
ME: Okay, I promise.
MOOSH: Good. We can’t have the whole fucking world finding out that I swear! Or that I talk to you at all, actually. I mean, it’s kind of embarrassing. What kind of person would associate with you?
ME: That’s an excellent point.
MOOSH: So, did you know that it’s Mormon tradition for all of someone’s friends to buy her extravagant birthday presents for her birthday?
ME: No, I had no idea.
MOOSH: Yup! And if her friends don’t spend at least $200-300 each on her, she will go straight to hell.
ME: Well, damn. I don’t want you to go to hell.
MOOSH: I know you don’t. That’s very sweet. So here’s my wishlist. Go crazy.
ME: Well, I need to watch my budget now, with the divorce and all.
MOOSH: Oh, I see how it is. You WANT me to go to hell. Fine. Fucker.
ME: Okay. I guess I’ll go spend lots of money on you for your birthday. What are friends for?
MOOSH: Yay!!
ME: But first, I’m going to go touch Jesus for a while.
MOOSH: GAH!
Enjoy this interview? Check out my other dead (mostly) celebrity (mostly) interviews:
Adolf Hitler
Peter Graves
Corey Haim
My Grandmother
Roy Scheider
Zelda Rubinstein and J.D. Salinger
Brittany Murphy
Oral Roberts
John Lennon
Ken Ober
Henry Gibson
Patrick Swayze
Ted Kennedy
John Hughes
Michael Jackson and Farrah Fawcett
Walter Cronkite
Billy Mays
Ed McMahon
Stephen Hawking
Robert Novak
Caylee Anthony
David Carradine
Martin Luther King, Jr.
*Everything in this interview is completely manufactured and no interview actually took place. Casey does not swear and my penis is not named Jesus. Although my testicles ARE named Luke and Matthew. Happy birthday, Casey! Love you lots!
**Also, it’s Brittany’s birthday too. I don’t know Brittany that well, but she’s damn funny. Happy birthday, Barefootfoodie!
Enjoy this post? Try these:Love for the Mormons
My interview with Walter Cronkite
My Interview with Phillip Spicklefritz
Twitter: mooshinindy
says:
Please make the footnote SO MUCH BIGGER.
As big as Jesus.
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@moosh in indy., As big as your Jesus, or as big as Adam’s Jesus?
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Twitter: mooshinindy
on April 28th, 2010 at Wednesday, April 28, 2010 @ 1:14 pm
@Miss Grace, As big as that Jesus down in Brazil.
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And it was my birthday, today – err yesterday – well – the 27th, however you are counting roght now!
Happy birthday Moosh!
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@Aimee Greeblemonkey, Happy Birthday to you too!
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Twitter: Kimt205
says:
Happy Birthday Moosh !! : )
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Happy birthday!!!
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Usted designó a su pene Jesus? Por qué?
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Twitter: mooshinindy
on April 28th, 2010 at Wednesday, April 28, 2010 @ 12:30 am
@B.E. Earl, no sé, como se dice CRAZY y LONELY.
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HA! This interview gives new meaning to *Jesus Saves*.
Great interview…and happy birthday, Mooshinindy!
-Aimee
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Twitter: habanerogal
says:
Too funny. Happy Birthday to Casey. Glad I don’t know any Mormons IRL cuz then my birthday expenses would be CRAZY
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I went on a cruise with my two best Mormon friends for their 30th birthdays in January. I definitely spent over $300 a piece. Casey, you should definitely keep this part of the post true! You might get all your fiends to go to the Bahamas with you!
Happy birthday sweet Casey.
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Fiends, friends. Darn the iPad.
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Twitter: mooshinindy
on April 28th, 2010 at Wednesday, April 28, 2010 @ 7:59 am
@Kim, OOH! I that’s what I want for my birthday! ARRANGE.
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Best birthday blog.
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I’m glad your penis isn’t named Jesus because now I don’t have to sue you for copyright infringement.
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Twitter: mooshinindy
on April 28th, 2010 at Wednesday, April 28, 2010 @ 1:15 pm
@Grant, I must admit, my knockers are named Mildred and Unis.
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Twitter: karensugarpants
says:
Okay that was the best interview yet. So awesome. I was convinced it was her until the swearing. Which is even funnier – especially when you imagine it all in her sweet little voice.
Happy Birthday Casey!
xo
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Twitter: mooshinindy
on April 28th, 2010 at Wednesday, April 28, 2010 @ 1:16 pm
@Karen Sugarpants, He probably could have pulled it off if he had left the swears out.
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HAPPY BIRTHDAY CASEY:)
And THANKS for the Birthday Wishes Adam!!!!
Also, if I had balls and a penis, I would name my balls father and son, and my penis the holy spirit.
See what I did right there?
No?
It was funnier when I thought of it in the shower.
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Twitter: mooshinindy
on April 28th, 2010 at Wednesday, April 28, 2010 @ 1:15 pm
@Brittany, I just loled a little in my mouth.
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I’m not sure I’d have named my penis Jesus. Mostly because of this one fairy tale I read where they nailed another guy named Jesus to a phone pole using railroad spikes. Also, it took him three days to rise, but they didn’t have Viagra back then.
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Too bad your penis is not named Jesus because if it were whenever Gwen and I talk about Jesus we’d be talking about your weenie.
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Best interview ever. Love ya both!
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Happy Birthday, Moosh/ Casey!
Adam, stop touching Jesus.
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Happy Birthday Casey.
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Twitter: perpstu
says:
Happy birthday Casey!!
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It’s no surprise to me that you and Case are such fast friends. You both have the biggest damn hearts of almost everyone I know.
Happy Birthday Casey. I love you.
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Twitter: mooshinindy
on April 30th, 2010 at Friday, April 30, 2010 @ 10:23 am
@Redneck Mommy, aw. shucks. i just shaved and now i’m all warm and fuzzy.
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Happy Birthday, Casey! xoxo
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Twitter: coalminersgd
says:
Happy Birthday! And please, don’t touch Jesus.
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Happy Birthday, Casey!
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Twitter: hellohahanarf
says:
yaaaaaaaaaaaaaay, birthday! happy, happy day, moosh.
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Happy Birthday Casey!!
This is awesome and scary because those Mormon boys have been to my house… they are some scary mother effers.
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Twitter: themuskrat
says:
I remember when I turned 28. I nearly got court-martialed for hiding in the back of an ambulance and going off-base for some smuggled whiskey and food that didn’t come from an MRE in Iraq. That was the first time I’ve been offered cash for sex.
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Twitter: coalminersgd
on April 29th, 2010 at Thursday, April 29, 2010 @ 2:41 pm
@muskrat, And you claim to have a boring life? Whatev.
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Twitter: mooshinindy
on April 30th, 2010 at Friday, April 30, 2010 @ 10:24 am
@muskrat, Oh yeah? This one time I ended up in the back of a gold Cadillac with a pimp and a ho from Vegas. True story.
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Hmm. I think maybe this whole interview is fake because I don’t think Casey would say “fuck.” Or am I wrong? I haven’t read her blog for a long time. I laughed for about a week when Craig did the chocolate vs. vanilla debate with her. Cracked me right up!
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May you live all the days of your life.One of my favorite birthday quote.
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