I know it’s a little delayed, but in the wake of the Swiss refusal to allow the US to extradite Roman Polanski, I thought I’d put up a little primer for all of those people out there who worry that they too may have to flee to Switzerland, land of chocolate, clocks, cheese, and chesters the molesters. If you match more than one of these traits, you might be a sexual predator on par with Roman Polanski.
You Might Be a Sexual Predator If:
- You can enjoy the subtle hints of grape in the bouquet of a Caprisun
- The delay in the release of the Blu-ray version of the Hannah Montana series really ruined your Saturday night plans.
- The Pope reassigned you to a parish in Poland or Russia.
- Every time you see a football field with no turf on it, you get an urge to go play ball.
- You have a “regular room” at the Nickelodeon Hotel in Orlando.
- Chris Hansen haunts your nightmares.
- Your race car bed is specifically designed to have a Craftmatic Adjustable Mattress so that your back feels okay.
- Without consulting the Internet, you can tell the difference between each individual Jonas Brother.
- Your name was Michael Jackson.
In other Avita-news, happy birthday to Bellaventa – hope you have a great 31st, Robin!