In the end of September, I’ll be flying up to Vermont to go to my cousin Dennis’s wedding. His fiancee is one of those creative types, and the invitation that she and her sister came up with is clever and cute and funny. In fact, I’d say it’s one of the best wedding invitations I’ve ever seen:
I know that the saying “Today I will be happier than a bird with a french fry” was adapted from something they saw online, but it just seems so very apt. It would be a faux pas for me to use it when I get married again and become Mr. Sarah Silverman, so I thought I’d come up with some other options for my future wedding invitations:
- Before too long I can let myself go.
- Our baby will be named “Shotgun Marital Bliss”.
- Hear us say those two all-important words: Open Bar.
- Ninjas couldn’t keep us apart.
- Avitable 2: The Avitabling.
- We make sickeningly cutesy nicknames and baby voices look good.
- It rhymes with shmatrimony.
- Smooch. Clink. Awww. Homina.
- Thundercats Ho!
- We invited our exes so expect some Jerry Springer shit to go down.