Today is the 30th birthday of one of the funniest bloggers on the Internet, Metalia (the one not wearing the cool glasses or with the beard).
- She raps, and does it well.
- Her kids puke so much that you’ll appreciate your children even more.
- Metalia looks 16, so it’s even funnier when she lets loose with a “WHAT THE FUCK?!?!”
- She drinks whiskey like Don Draper.
- Her TV obsession is almost as ridiculous as mine.
- I’m totally jealous of her Ninja Turtle Snuggie.
- She perpetuates the stereotype that Jewish New Yorkers are hilarious. Mel Brooks should be proud.
- Metalia manages to embrace her religion, raise her children, blog frequently, go to conferences, and maintain a large readership without courting controversy for controversy’s sake, speaking negatively about anyone (unless the fucker spoils a TV show on Twitter, but that’s understandable), or being cliquey, snooty, or anything other than wonderful.
- Because I said so!
Happy birthday, Metalia. L’chaim!