51 thoughts on “Red Velvet”

  1. I love that your videos start out-“Hey fuckers….”

    You do realize that I now have to go and get like 5 of these at Target tomorrow. Which is gonna totally blow my diet. So thanks for single handedly RUINING my diet.


  2. Um. Red Velvet cake is just vanilla/cocoa flavored buttermilk cake with red coloring added. No, really.

    So what the fucking hell is “red velvet base,” really? Is that their awesome way of not having to list the buttload of Red Dye 40 in that shit?

    Your insides are crying right now, Adam. Jesus.

  3. With a complete lack of taste, I put forth the following suggestion:

    Mix it with some Bailey’s or other creamy liquor, heat it to just about boiling and pour it in some (new) Diva Cups, and call it “Mrs. Clause’s Aunt Flow”.

  4. Go back and see if they have boiled custard. It should be roughly in the same section, the specialty dairy area (next to the nog). The flavor is different but the description is similar – sweet and thick and any more than half a glass will be an over-indulgence.

  5. Ugh… that looked gross. HOWEVER. I may by some and pretend I’m a vampire having a wonderful holiday concoction of TruBlood Eggnot. Not a typo… “Eggnot… because it’s not…” I’m going to be rich. Oh, wait, too late, I already am. 😀

  6. *gag*

    I’ve never understood the glam of red velvet cake. It’s really just devil’s food with a shit ton of red dye in it…which I can’t stand ANYthing with that medicinal flavor.

    Just…don’t be afraid when you see the red dye in the toilet tomorrow morning…:P

  7. I have always found colored and favored milk kind of gross. But then, I find all milk kind of gross. Except chocolate soy milk or chocolate almond milk.

    And now you will probably find me and beat me with a carton of Red Velvet milk. Hopefully an empty one.

Leave a Reply