Before I get into today’s post, don’t forget about tonight’s new episode of CYR!
I’ll be taking an hour and talking about Nintendo, stand-up, anal bleaching, marathon masturbating, and more.
As always, you can download the Talkshoe Pro client to listen in live and join us in the chatroom. You can even call in and tell me how shitty awesome I am!
Now, here I am jumping on the Charlie Sheen is a fucking nutball bandwagon with a little quiz for you. Without Googling, can you tell if the following quotes are by Charlie Sheen or Gary Busey?
1. You know what FAILING stands for? It stands for Finding An Important Lesson, Inviting Needed Growth.
2. If you try [the drug called my name] once, you will die. Your face will melt off and your children will weep over your exploded body.
3. Every day is just filled with just wins. All we do is put wins in the record books. We win so radically in our underwear before our first cup of coffee, it’s scary. People say it’s lonely at the top, but I sure like the view.
4. Drinking your own blood is the paradigm of recycling.
5. I have to love more than one woman at a time because the sheer force of my power is too much for any one woman to handle.
6. There has got to be more to life than being a really, really, ridiculously good actor.
7. [Porn stars] are the best at what they do and I’m the best at what I do. And together, it’s like, it’s on.
8. I’m tired of pretending I’m not a total bitchin’ rock star from Mars, and people can’t figure me out; they can’t process me. I don’t expect them to. You can’t process me with a normal brain.
9. I’ve been told by doctors and surgeons that I have the energy of ten men who have normal jobs.
10. I have a 10,000-year-old brain and the boogers of a 7-year-old.