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The superior things in life, as determined by Avitable

It seems like I do a post like this once a year.  It’s a simple concept that I saw over at Ali Martell’s hilarious blog.  A list, with no guidelines, of what things are better than other things.  Here we go:

Roger Sterling in Mad Mean, season 5 (so far) > Don Draper > Roger Sterling in seasons 1-4

21 Jump Street the movie > 21 Jump Street the TV show

Cadbury Creme Eggs > Cadbury Chocolate Creme Eggs

Mayonnaise > all other condiments > anything spicy

Alligators > snakes

Louis CK > Dane Cook > Jeff Dunham

Ke$ha > Lady Gaga > Katy Perry

Redheads > everything

Real sex > video sex > phone sex > sexting

Three Olives Loopy Vodka > Pinnacle flavors

A photo of Max Headroom on a cardboard box body > Mitt Romney > Newt Gingrich > Rick Santorum

Money >= happiness

Twitter > Pinterest

Amalah > someone who just learned how to read and write > Kristin Ruiz

No pants > pants

Coke Zero > 5-hour Energy > Pseudophedrine > Coffee

Filet mignon > prime rib

Medium rare > Medium > Medium well > Rare > Well done

Potato latkes > french fries > mashed potatoes > baked potatoes > breakfast potatoes > potatoes au gratin

IUD > birth control > outercourse > abstinence > condoms

Darkman’s Liam Neeson > Taken’s Liam Neeson > The Grey’s Liam Neeson > Star Wars: The Phantom Menace’s Liam Neeson

Conan O’Brien > Craig Ferguson > Jimmy Fallon > Jimmy Kimmel > David Letterman > Jay Leno

Amazon > Target > Goodwill > Walmart > Kmart

Saturday Night Live > Anything you think you could do for 90 minutes, week after week

The beach > the midwest

Joel McHale > Aisha Tyler > John Henson > Greg Kinnear > Hal Sparks

Abed > Pierce > Jeff > Troy > Annie > Brita > Shirley

Being an intellectual elitist anal-retentive borderline OCD control freak with a hero complex > being you

Going out to dinner > preparing, cooking, and cleaning up at home

Buffy > The Wire > Firefly > Gilmore Girls > The Sopranos

2012 > 2011 > 2010

What about you?

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49 Replies to “The superior things in life, as determined by Avitable”

  1. B.E. Earl

    Roger Sterling was gold (hehehe) on the season premiere Mad Men. His one-liners were cracking me up. My favorite was him telling Crane that he tried to get his wife to do the Zou Bisou thing, but “…she doesn’t speak French, doesn’t like me.”

  2. Just Me

    “A photo of Max Headroom on a cardboard box body > Mitt Romney > Newt Gingrich > Rick Santorum”

    hahahaha! Though I might put it more like this…
    A photo of Max Headroom on a cardboard box body > Mitt Romney + Newt Gingrich + Rick Santorum

  3. Dave2

    Except… they don’t do those 90 minutes week after week on SNL. They take numerous breaks throughout the season. If they DID have those 90 minutes week after week, I’d be a lot less forgiving than I am now when it comes to the quality of the show.

    • Avitable

      @Dave2, they generally do 3-4 shows in a row minimum. Sketch comedy is so hard to do, and they don’t even really know if something is going to work until they perform it live. I think the quality is as good as it’s ever been.

  4. Jules

    I wasn’t thrilled when I read “redheads” are better than everyone else…since I’m brunette and all. But then you threw in Amazon and No Pants. Damn you! *waves fist in air*

  5. Dawne at D Magazine

    Oooh this looks like fun!

    Funny SNL Jon Hamm > Don Draper > MMen Season 1 > MMen Seasons 2 – 4

    Chocolate > Anything not Chocolate

    Dane Cook > Louis C K > Ron White > Jeff Dunham

    U2 > Beatles > Elvis (I will lose friends for this)

    FunnyManBoy Type > Macho

    Jeans > Pants > Skirts

    Iced Tea > Diet Coke

    The MeatSalad > Burgers > Salad

    Jimmy Fallon > Jimmy Kimmel > David Letterman > Jay Leno

    Amazon > Beating The Streets Looking For Bargains

    30 Rock > Saturday Night Live

    The Cote d’ Azure > Provence

    Lake Como > Tuscany

    Peaceful Life > Much Activity

    Going out to dinner > preparing, cooking, and cleaning up at home …<__perfect as is

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