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Twelve times two times two times TMI

Adam Avitable comedian

This photo has no relation to the post at all. It’s just me holding me in a hat!

We’re flashing back to 2006 and doing a good old meme. Why? Because I want to and it’s my birthday on Saturday and I’m going to be old and die soon. So there. Thanks to Lou for the inspiration.

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?

Umm, only the first man of the entire world ever. The guy who named the animals and gave Eve a rib and probably also had a really kick-ass beard. And who probably had sex with the animals before Eve existed. And was probably responsible for original sin.

Umm, I’m named after Adam Smith, pioneer of modern economics.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?

When my friend Aaron died. Before that, when Bruce Willis’s character dies in the movie Armageddon.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?

Yes. I even did all of the addressing of the envelopes and invitations when I got married oh so many years ago. Next wedding, we’re going with preprinted labels though.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?

Peanut butter M&Ms.

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?

Probably. I’ve become quite the sexual gadabout since I got divorced.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?

Probably not if that other person was too much like me. I repel my own kind.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?

Noooooooo never.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?

Yes.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?

I don’t even normal jump.

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?

Life mixed with Cocoa Krispies mixed with Cinnamon Toast Crunch in a bowl filled with egg nog.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?

Only the ones that aren’t stapled to my feet.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?

My entire self-worth is tied up in gauging the response of an audience and the anxiety of what other people think can sometimes shatter me into a million pieces, but sure, whatever. I’ll say that I’m strong.

[CONTINUED]

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?

Chocolate with Oreos and more chocolate. Wrapped in bacon.

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?

With women, it’s their eyes. I can fall in love with the right pair of eyes. With men, it’s their beard or lack thereof. Because it’s always a competition.

15. RED OR PINK?

Steak: pink
Lips: red
Fashion: red

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?

Other than my weight and narcissism and lack of success and baldness and need for attention and obsessiveness and average penis size and fear that I’ll never be able to be that person I imagine myself becoming? Ohh, nothing.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?

My VVBFF, though our friendship now would be different than it was. But for a while, it was a perfect friendship, and I don’t know if I’ve reached that exact level of friendship with anyone else.

18. WHAT IS THE TECHNIQUE THAT YOU NEED TO WORK ON THE MOST?

Like, cunninlinguistically?

19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?

I’m not.

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?

Like, cunninlinguistically?

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?

Top Chef season 10 is on in the background. I’m listening to Stefan be awesome. I missed him!

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?

A Sharpie.

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?

Cinnamon and sugar. Bacon. The sea.

Alternate answer:  Like, cunninlinguistically?

24. HOW IMPORTANT ARE YOUR POLITICAL VIEWS TO YOU?

I don’t have political views. I have human rights views. And those are very important.

25. MOUNTAIN HIDEAWAY OR BEACH HOUSE?

This is America. Both.

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!

27. HAIR COLOR?

Nude.

28. EYE COLOR?

Hazel?

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?

Nope. I still have perfect eyes EVEN THOUGH I’M GOING TO BE OLD AND DIE ON SATURDAY.

30. FAVORITE FOOD?

Chocolate and bacon and meat and mayonnaise.

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?

I love a good horror, and I love a good love story. But getting a handy while watching a horror sounds good – can I just take both?

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?

Planes, Trains, and Automobiles. They don’t make movies like that anymore.

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?

I’m not.

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?

Summer is fun if you have air conditioning. Winter is fun if you live somewhere like Florida or Southern California. Anytime I can sunbathe in my birthday suit is good with me.

35. FAVORITE DESSERT?

A nice chocolate souffle.

36. STRENGTH TRAINING OR CARDIO?

Strength training is easier for me which means I should probably be doing cardio. I’ve chosen to do neither as a form of protest.

37. COMPUTER OR TELEVISION?

Computer. I can work and watch TV at the same time. Unless we’re talking about a 3D TV and porn . . .

38. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?

I’ve started re-reading all of Lee Child’s Jack Reacher novels. I’m on Echo Burning right now.

39. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?

Now we know this meme is from 2006.

40. FAVORITE SOUND?

G-rated answer: The ocean or a great rainstorm.

41. FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC?

Pop. The poppier and glitterier and flashier and shallower, the more I like it. I will be making Ke$ha my new wife some day.

42. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?

8,000 who-gives-a-shits.

43. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?

Like, cunnin- oh, that’s getting tired now.

I’m persuasive. Like, in an eerie I can convince almost anyone to do almost anything way. However, I don’t use that talent anymore because it makes me into a disingenuous person.

44. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?

Quincy, Massachusetts. On January 26th, 1977.  DID I MENTION IT’S MY BIRTHDAY ON SATURDAY?

45. WHERE ARE YOU LIVING NOW?

Orlando, Florida. The tourist armpit of the world.

46. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HOUSE?

I don’t know. Is neutral a color?

47. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR CAR?

Phantom Grey. Which does not mean, like I had hoped, that it turns into a ghost when I drive by cops.

48. DO YOU LIKE ANSWERING 48 QUESTIONS?

Like, cunninglinguistically?


If you’re bored, do this. You may not be less bored, but it will at least consume twenty minutes of your boring life.

If you’re more bored, go test your ability with movie/television trivia. I’m kind of ashamed at how few people have been able to find any references. I used to think that I had some of the smartest readers in the blogosphere, but I’m quickly reassessing that!

9 thoughts on “Twelve times two times two times TMI”

  1. “She’s little, but she’s strong. Her first baby came out sideways and she didn’t scream or nothin’.”

    My favorite PTAA quote. I always envision the baby coming out sideways. Ouch.

    And happy, happy birthday. xoxo

  2. I love Stefan, too. I don’t care if he’s a liar, he’s charming.

    I never said anything to you about your friend Aaron. I didn’t understand who he was to you but I now see that it made you cry that he died and I am very sorry for your loss.

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