Shark Tank on CNBC

My failed audition for Shark Tank, plus win a free sample box!

A bunch of erryday ‘Murricans pitch new, innovative products to cutthroat venture capitalists on CNBC every Tuesday. Some of these products get the investment they need to experience commercial success. Most of the products get laughed all the way out the door. But the good shit? Those products get made! And the people at Shark Tank CNBC put together a kick-ass sample box, and sent one to me. Shark Tank sample box Do you want one? Follow the rules below and you’ll be entered into a drawing for a sample box of your very own! There are a few caveats, though. Some of these products should have disclaimers but they weren’t included, so I added ones of my own:

Now, before I let you enter the contest, I have to admit something. I submitted an application for a product to Shark Tank, and it was rejected. I don’t think it should have been. I think the VCs should have invested in my product, and you could have been buying it in stores everywhere that awesome fucking products are sold. But it’s their loss, and I’m proud to offer this product to each of you.

Get out your credit cards and call today.

Operators are standing by.

Get ready . . .

to purchase your very own . . .


The Avitapillow is the body pillow for the single or lonely woman. Or, just comment below for an entry to win a free Shark Tank sample box, plus do any of the other options for additional chances to win! a Rafflecopter giveaway

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14 Replies to “My failed audition for Shark Tank, plus win a free sample box!”

  1. Angela

    I would definitely buy that pillow. And then I would knit seasonal accessories for it, velcro them on, and sit the Avitapillow on my front porch to compete with my neighbor’s holiday bedecked concrete goose for our subdivision’s beautification aware.

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