Rain on your wedding day

Divorce and the Lace Anniversay. Thirteen Years Later.

I still haven’t gotten rid of that fucking calendar notification.

Why not?

I don’t know.

It seems like it should be easy.

Just click “delete”.

Yet I can’t.


Will I get married again? Sure. No. Maybe. There are too many steps from this point in my life to even get to the consideration of another marriage.

I should probably do more dating. Get into a healthy relationship with someone to whom I’m attracted, who I trust, who doesn’t have baggage that colors her every action. Find someone to share my life with.

But it’s so hard. I have an active social life. I’m out performing 3-4 nights a week. I work a day job that has taken over my life. I work until I stress myself out and then I crawl under the covers and sleep until I have to do something else. Where does someone else fit?

Today would have been my 13th anniversary. Thirteen years ago, I stood in a church, an immature 24-year old with no idea of the burdens coming his way, and professed a promise to someone whom he loved. And man, did I fuck that one up royally.

I think, maybe, it’s a good idea to keep the reminder around a bit longer. Not to wallow in the past but to remain motivated. This is my reminder to strive towards happiness, to avoid settling out of a fear of being alone, and to remain secure in who I am when I let someone new into my life.

So this year I’ll just buy myself something lacy and frilly and keep on moving forward. Do you think Victoria’s Secret has something that will fit a gorilla?

6 thoughts on “Divorce and the Lace Anniversay. Thirteen Years Later.”

  1. I can’t give you relationship advice or even life advice on this one, but I can promise you with all my heart that you have a lot of people rooting for your happiness. In fact, I just made a flag made out of lace panties so you can spot me among that crowd.

  2. As a professional relationship-fucker-upper, I empathize with you. Life sucks. It’s stupid. I also got married young and it was so not a good idea. Yikes. But knowing how rad of a person you are makes me know that the lady you settle down with will be lucky as hell.

  3. I think it’s healthy to acknowledge it. I know as I see the date come and go, I often have my own passing thoughts about what anniversary it might have been. 11th.

    I’m better off, and I remind myself of that, and your motivation is the perfect reason to keep the reminder.

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