So I survived my trip to a haunted bed and breakfast – I'll write more about that later. Today marks the end of the week of Avitable, culminating on my birthday.
I turn 32 today, a fact that fills me with dread, because no matter what anyone else says, everything from 30 on is downhill, the inevitable march towards 40, which is even worse than it sounds! "40 is the new 20," people say. Bullshit! You're still 40!
I received gifts from several of my blogger friends, and I will be thanking each and every one of you soon, so don't worry if you haven't heard from me yet. I'm sure the gift arrived, but I just haven't had time to properly appreciate it and respond to you.
Anyways, in "celebration" of my slow decline into death, I thought I would come up with 32 things that annoy me. (Originally, I was going to list 32 things that I have witnessed or enjoyed or am proud of, but that's way too sunshiny happy optimistic for a cynical elitist condescending bastard such as myself.)
32 Things that Annoy, Displease or Otherwise Offend Avitable:
32. People who don't know the difference between possessives and plurals.
31. Movie talkers
30. Dress codes
29. American Idol
28. Country music
27. Spectator sports
26. Laugh tracks
25. Things that are dumbed down for people with no attention spans
24. Machismo
23. Freeloaders
22. Studio executives
21. Fake breasts
20. Children
19. Bodybuilders
18. Mushrooms
17. Overly friendly strangers
16. Incompetence at any level
15. Uggos
14. Anyone who watches The Hills
13. Old people who talk about sex
12. People who hide behind anonymity
11. Italian food
10. Food with bones in it
09. Couples who go out to dinner by themselves and sit on the same side of the table
08. Tattoos
07. People with no sense of humor
06. Bumper stickers
05. Ocean cruises
04. Tropical islands
03. People who try to correct me when I'm right
02. Surprises
01. Cynical elitist condescending bastards who complain about things
On the plus side, while writing this list, I figured out that I can keep this list going until my 90s!


















