The One Where I …
- Pose for Playgirl
- Talk about my divorce 2 3
- Review sex toys
- Horrify you with my Aristocrats joke
- Discuss my weight loss
- Prove I'm an expert 2 3
- Show you my balls
- Interview my dead grandmother
- Want to have a child
- Go on my first date as a divorced man
- Teach you about dirty talk
- Go to a strip club for the first time
- Talk to a heroin addict
- Discuss auto-erotica
- Console a grieving mother
- Write a letter to my body
- Review my life lessons
-
-
- Andy Rooney
- Steve Jobs
- Amy Winehouse
- Leonard Stern, creator of Mad Libs
- Jack Kevorkian
- Randy "Macho Man" Savage
- Osama bin Laden
- Elizabeth Taylor
- Jack LaLanne
- Leslie Nielsen
- Bob Guccione
- Barbara Billingsley
- Tony Curtis
- Dennis Hopper
- Gary Coleman
- Chinese murderer**
- Casey, aka Moosh In Indy*
- Adolf Hitler
- Peter Graves
- Corey Haim
- My Grandmother**
- Roy Scheider
- Zelda Rubinstein, J.D. Salinger
- Brittany Murphy
- Oral Roberts
- John Lennon
- Ken Ober
- Henry Gibson
- Patrick Swayze
- Ted Kennedy
- John Hughes
- Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett
- Walter Cronkite
- Billy Mays
- Ed McMahon
- Stephen Hawking*
- Robert Novak
- Caylee Anthony
- David Carradine
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
-
Recent Posts
Find me at:
Tag Archives: apple
Things you can buy instead of an out-of-stock iPad
Apple has run out of iPads! You can’t pre-order them anymore, and the roll-out date has been pushed back at least a week or longer, depending on which type of iPad you want to buy. So now you have $500-800 … Continue reading
Apple’s new product launching today
Most people are predicting that Apple’s big announcement today will likely be the “iSlate”, a tablet that should have an expanded version of the iPhone OS and touchscreen capabilities. Those people are WRONG. My sources tell me that one of … Continue reading
If we always had Twitter
(If you’re looking for the contest winner, scroll down!) Twitter, for those of you with your heads lodged firmly up your geriatric keisters, is a microblogging site where people can tell the world what they’re doing, reply to other people … Continue reading
Posted in I am evil
Tagged apple, avitable, comedy, contest, dark humor, humor, ipod touch, twitter
93 Comments
5 Years of Avitable and the World Hasn’t Ended Yet.
Today’s post marks five years of blogging for me. 1,700 posts. 40,000 comments. One million visitors. When I first started blogging, Blog Explosion and Battle of the Blogs were two ways that people found out about new blogs to read. … Continue reading
Posted in Serious stuff
Tagged anniversary, apple, avitable, blogging, blogiversary, contest, free stuff, giveaway, ipod, ipod touch, sappy
455 Comments
Top 10 Things Your iPhone Won’t Do
Yesterday, after Apple’s exciting World Wide Developers Conference (shouldn’t it be Developers’ Conference? Is it a conference for the developers or comprised of developers or is it both?), the internet was abuzz with news of the latest iPhone, due June … Continue reading
Posted in satire
Tagged apple, apps, comedy, humor, iphone, iphone 3gs, parody, satire, steve jobs, top apps, top iphone apps, wwdc
83 Comments








