The One Where I …
- Pose for Playgirl
- Talk about my divorce 2 3
- Review sex toys
- Horrify you with my Aristocrats joke
- Discuss my weight loss
- Prove I'm an expert 2 3
- Show you my balls
- Interview my dead grandmother
- Want to have a child
- Go on my first date as a divorced man
- Teach you about dirty talk
- Go to a strip club for the first time
- Talk to a heroin addict
- Discuss auto-erotica
- Console a grieving mother
- Write a letter to my body
- Review my life lessons
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- Andy Rooney
- Steve Jobs
- Amy Winehouse
- Leonard Stern, creator of Mad Libs
- Jack Kevorkian
- Randy "Macho Man" Savage
- Osama bin Laden
- Elizabeth Taylor
- Jack LaLanne
- Leslie Nielsen
- Bob Guccione
- Barbara Billingsley
- Tony Curtis
- Dennis Hopper
- Gary Coleman
- Chinese murderer**
- Casey, aka Moosh In Indy*
- Adolf Hitler
- Peter Graves
- Corey Haim
- My Grandmother**
- Roy Scheider
- Zelda Rubinstein, J.D. Salinger
- Brittany Murphy
- Oral Roberts
- John Lennon
- Ken Ober
- Henry Gibson
- Patrick Swayze
- Ted Kennedy
- John Hughes
- Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett
- Walter Cronkite
- Billy Mays
- Ed McMahon
- Stephen Hawking*
- Robert Novak
- Caylee Anthony
- David Carradine
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Recent Posts
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Tag Archives: babysitting
What I learned this weekend
This past weekend, I moved into Britt’s house for a night. She and Jared went away all day Saturday and Sunday, and I stayed over to watch her kids. I was there for 31 hours, 56 minutes, and 44 seconds. … Continue reading
Posted in General
Tagged avitable, babysitting, britt, childless, kids, miss britt, parenting, parents
49 Comments
My review of Watchmen
On Movie Friday at work, a group of us went and saw “Watchmen”. Those of you with even the slightest background in comics know that this movie is based on a graphic novel – one of the most influential of … Continue reading
Battered and bruised
I’m sitting here at 11:00 on Sunday night, trying to write a post. Every time I type a key, I wince – every movement sends pain throughout my body. My body is black and blue, and it hurts to breathe. … Continue reading
Babysitting
One of my regular blog reads is Oh, the Joys. She had a post yesterday about
Posted in Rants
Tagged angry, avitable, babysitting, molestation, obnoxious, Rants, stupid-people
78 Comments
Translator
On Saturday (my wedding anniversary), I had the distinct pleasure of sitting on babysitting the creatures that spawned from Britt’s unholy vagina. They were very well-behaved, which just made me more nervous since I just knew that they were secretly … Continue reading
War has nothing on babysitting
On Saturday I had the pleasure of babysitting Britt’s children while she and my wife went shopping. This was the first time in almost 15 years that I have had to babysit, and, of course, the first time I’ve had … Continue reading








