The One Where I …
- Pose for Playgirl
- Talk about my divorce 2 3
- Review sex toys
- Horrify you with my Aristocrats joke
- Discuss my weight loss
- Prove I'm an expert 2 3
- Show you my balls
- Interview my dead grandmother
- Want to have a child
- Go on my first date as a divorced man
- Teach you about dirty talk
- Go to a strip club for the first time
- Talk to a heroin addict
- Discuss auto-erotica
- Console a grieving mother
- Write a letter to my body
- Review my life lessons
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- Andy Rooney
- Steve Jobs
- Amy Winehouse
- Leonard Stern, creator of Mad Libs
- Jack Kevorkian
- Randy "Macho Man" Savage
- Osama bin Laden
- Elizabeth Taylor
- Jack LaLanne
- Leslie Nielsen
- Bob Guccione
- Barbara Billingsley
- Tony Curtis
- Dennis Hopper
- Gary Coleman
- Chinese murderer**
- Casey, aka Moosh In Indy*
- Adolf Hitler
- Peter Graves
- Corey Haim
- My Grandmother**
- Roy Scheider
- Zelda Rubinstein, J.D. Salinger
- Brittany Murphy
- Oral Roberts
- John Lennon
- Ken Ober
- Henry Gibson
- Patrick Swayze
- Ted Kennedy
- John Hughes
- Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett
- Walter Cronkite
- Billy Mays
- Ed McMahon
- Stephen Hawking*
- Robert Novak
- Caylee Anthony
- David Carradine
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
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Tag Archives: gift guide
The 2010 Avitable Holiday Gift Guide
It may seem weird for me to post a gift guide after writing a post last week about feeling very Grinchy, but I don’t want everyone to have a bad holiday season. I just don’t feel like celebrating it myself! … Continue reading
Children’s Gift Guide for People Who Hate Kids
As everyone probably knows, with the exception of the children of a few friends, I hate your kids. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have to buy gifts for them sometimes. I buy all the gifts in our household so … Continue reading
Posted in Avitable Gives Advice
Tagged children, christmas, christmas shopping, gift guide, gifts, gifts for kids, good for the kids, guide, humor, shopping, wish list
83 Comments
Avitable’s Gift Guide for the Four Year Old Girl
On Sunday, I have a little party to go to. I carefully researched presents to buy for Emma, who is turning four years old, and I thought I’d share my research with all of you so that if any of … Continue reading
Posted in I am evil
Tagged avitable, birthday, daughters, gift guide, gifts, gifts for daughters, gifts for girls, gifts for kids, girls, guide, humor, parody, presents, satire, toys
43 Comments








