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I love Michael Bay

Before you get to read your regularly scheduled post, here’s the NYCWD update:

As of right now, at midnight EST on Thursday, June 28th, we have raised over $3000! It’s stalled a little, with only a few purchases coming in yesterday, but I’m hoping for one more big push before I shut this down on Sunday. Do you get paid today? Why not kick in $5? Or $500?

And now, Friday’s post:

Too fucking tired to really post anything of use, except the following.

1. Got to see an advance screening of Transformers. It fucking rocked. I was more impressed than I thought I could be. Go see this when it comes out next week.

2. I’m thinking that we might have people who read here who might feel a bit intimidated by the idea of commenting. My comments tend to get a bit cliquey, but I want to take today to ask any random lurkers just to take a minute to comment and say hi. We don’t bite, I promise. Well, actually, we do. But in a good way.

3. Go over to These Walls and check out our posts. There’s some comedy genius over there, and you might be missing out!

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125 Replies to “I love Michael Bay”

  1. Devilish Girl

    You bite in a good way? Well hell, had I known that I would have commented a lot more since I joined the Church. LOL Congrats on the total so far. I’m going to kick in a little more tomorrow instead of going to the movies.

    Transformers does look interesting, but I was afraid it would be all geeked out.

  2. Jay

    I finally started commenting last week, after a month or so of lurking. Not only was it painless, but the very next day I regained the sight in my previously blind left eye. Thanks Avitable!

  3. Amy

    What clique? I thought you said you hated everybody and would gut them publicly if they commented without your permission?

    Did I misunderstand that? I filed the letter you sent me just in case your goons show up.

  4. Brandi

    Ive been out of the state and whatnot for a few weeks. Ive read everything but I haven’t taken the time out of vacation to comment. I might go back and be the late commenter. How did you get an advanced screening?!

  5. Dave2

    1) Try to stop me. I’m looking forward to this film more than just about any other summer flick.

    2) What do we do if we are already a regular commenter? Should we comment twice or something?

    3) Talk about a blog that people should be afraid of commenting on… an IM session on smelling your own penis?!? I will spend the rest of the night trying to get that picture out of my mind. And probably most of the morning too. Though an AviToon of you attempting to smell your penis would make a good T-shirt.

  6. Kentucky Girl

    Are you comment whoring? :loser:

    BTW, here is my comment whoring…I’ve changed my blog. I don’t have the same feed. Get with the program, kthx. EY :heartbeat: U…but not in that way..more in this way.. :boobs5:

  7. Dan

    I’ve commented before, but just the once.

    You reviewed my site once on IT2M, didn’t give me any smacks but didn’t roast me either.

    I give you 1 smack, because I’m big like that 🙂

  8. Melanie

    I probably qualify as a lurker, since I don’t generally comment here too often. However, that’s not any kind of editorial, or anything. I like your site, and if you go places I can’t get next to, I don’t read. Piece of cake!
    I do like almost everything you blog, though. So please don’t send your clique-thugs out to keel me. :batting:

  9. Jester

    Tell me you did NOT just use the word clique here. Didn’t you see how much trouble that got me into over at my site?? Do you not learn from other people’s mistakes? Are you destined to repeat them?

    Stay tuned for the next episode of Soap.

  10. Avitable

    Amanda, well, I’m a 30 year old man with the tastes of a 12-year old girl, and I liked it.

    Devilish Girl, of course – I always bite in a good way! Transformers is a bit geeked out, but Shia LaBeouf actually made the movie good. He’s an excellent actor!

    Fogspinner, a drive-by lurker?

    Jay, now let’s see if we can do something about that impotence for you.

    Amy, don’t ruin my disemboweling surprise!

    Brandi, commenting on my blog should be like a vacation! I have an employee who gets tickets to all of the advanced screenings.

    Margalit, here are some suggestions of things you can say, and you can mix these up as you wish: “You’re so funny!” “I love you” “You are the most awesome person to ever grace this world.”

    Dave, I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. You don’t have to comment twice, since I was one of the few people you commented on during your cruise. I still get all weepy thinking about that. And that site is fun to comment on. Everybody can smell their own penis!

    Sheila, “we” means the people in the comments. And I’ve never heard that phrase before right now, and I hate it too.

    Mixednut, Ahmoo is fine, but only if you’re going to pat me on the head and give me $20 every birthday.

    Dutchbitch, Shia LaBeouf is attractive. And trust me, you’ll like it. It’s not just about the toys.

    KB, no, I actually had someone say that my comments can be intimidating so I wanted to encourage people to feel emboldened. I was wondering why you hadn’t posted recently!

    Dan, I remember your blog, and thanks for commenting again. You’re a gracious man – thanks for the smack!

    Mist, is that sarcasm?

    Erica AP, you realize that you can close the Smilies and hide them by clicking the text, right?

    Bethie, it was too late for an old man like myself.

    RW, you are a mean drunk.

    Melanie, I go places you can’t get next to? Like single-file in line at the buffet?

    Mr. Fabulous, that saddens me. You should still check it out. It’ s a fun, fun movie.

    Jester, I wanted some of that fun that you get to have! And if we’re Soap, I get to be Billy Crystal. You’re definitely in. You class up the joint.

    Mel, I guess. Your decoder ring is in the mail.

    Mistress Yoda, I don’t. Michael Moore is as bad as the extremists on the right.

    Heather, well, you can’t see the bitemarks on that cute ass.

    Clown, that’s my hole!

    Trish, stalking is encouraged. Do you have a blog?

    Tug, have fun with the kids. Don’t let them wear your old ass out too badly!

    TMP, I was literally falling asleep at my computer as I typed it. You’re just lucky it didn’t say jalghaelg;agag, instead.

  11. HoosierGirl5

    Hi Avitable…
    I linked here from Tense Teacher when she first posted about NYCWatchdog’s boy. I really like your site and have it bookmarked.
    Tell me, do you think “Transformers” would be okay for a 7 yr. old boy? He is not afraid of semi-intense movies like “Harry Potter”. He is really into the toys and really wants to see this movie.
    Stop by sometime,

  12. Avitable

    Mel, and a secret password.

    HoosierGirl, it’s definitely okay for a 7-year old. There were several kids there and they all seemed to enjoy themselves. I’ll check out your site.

    Metalmom, I’ll nibble.

    Y not I, opposite like Jennifer Aniston or opposite like Jim Belushi?

  13. Girl, Dislocated

    I’m a lurker by nature. I lurked here for a while before I started commenting, but that’s just how I am. I lurk at lots of blogs because commenting makes me feel like I’m intruding somehow, like I’m showing up at a party uninvited.

  14. pnbzmom

    Hi Avitable! I actually have been a lurker of your site for a little while now. I got here through Miss Britt’s site. I’ve commented there a couple of times, but never have here. I am no longer an Avi blog virgin! Have a great weekend all!

  15. y not i

    Belushi. More hair, less weight.

    I had a girl tell me once I looked sorta like Tom Cruise. Then her little sister said I looked like Mister Rogers. So I’m a cross between those two.

  16. hellohahanarf

    a little nibble now and then i very appreciated.

    (that was awesome of you to recognize that folks might be intimidated and for you to extend the invitation…yay, you!)

    happy friday

  17. Avitable

    Mel, her other BFF.

    Pnbzmom, I’m happy to have popped your cherry. Do you have a blog?

    BPR, because of Transformers? It was awesome!

    Y not I, yeah. I won’t be biting you anytime soon.

    Hello, it’s only a nibble if I’m not hungry. If I’m hungry, you’d better watch out.

    Mistress Yoda, a pound of salt, maybe. He’s just as guilty of manipulating facts and blatantly lying as the fuckers he accuses. Look at Fahrenheit 911.

  18. Avitable

    Poppy, have you been the model for any other animated gifs?

    Pnb, you don’t have to be funny, but it can be a good place to share your thoughts on everything.

    Mistress Yoda, I don’t have any specific instances with Sicko to mention. It’s just that while his underlying message is always excellent, I don’t like the methods he uses.

  19. Bec

    Long time lurker – love your site, love particularly how you don’t give a flying fuck but you have good heart (or is that supposed to be a secret?)

    This gif could hve been modelled on me – :boobs3:

  20. Crys

    i am very intimidated by the people here. they seem very extroverted and i don’t know, extroverted. i’m not like that. i’m shy. i lurk a lot and don’t talk much.



  21. Miss Britt

    God DAMN IT Avi. I am never, ever, ever, ever invited to join cliques. And I finally get to be in one and you go and fucking RUIN it!

    I suppose you’re one of those people who advocate PUBLIC golf courses and are like anti-segregation and shit too!?

    To you lurkers: stay in your holes! I will not bite. I will tear your fucking head off, m’kay?

  22. Avitable

    Trish, you should! Blogging is what all the cool kids are doing.

    Mistress Yoda, no, I don’t think so. Why? Because I hate Morgan Spurlock?

    Bec, hi, nice to hear from you. And the big heart is a huge lie!

    Crystal, awwww. Do we have to encourage you to come out of your shell. Come to think of it, you are shy and quiet and stuff.

    TMP, brilliant!

    Melanie, I’m impressed with the air you can get!

    Jhianna, I’ve got sharp teeth.

    Annie, thanks! That’s awesome.

    Britt by Numbers, you’re always in the cliques – who are you kidding? You’re always the queen bitch of them, too!

    Tracy, if you have to ask . . .

    Angel, once bitten, twice shy?

  23. Lisa

    Damn I’m exhausted from reading all those comments. I thought we were talking about Clinique and I was going to comment about my new lipstick. Sorry it must be that drug induced coma I was in.

    I never heard of Transformers. I’m so out of the loop. :dunce:

  24. Avitable

    Mistress Yoda, yeah, I guess you are right. I studied documentaries in college, and it always seems like the most popular ones are the ones that are the least like documentaries, in the sense that they’re never presenting a balanced view.

    Sheila, I think you must be!

    I’ve Britt You Babe, oh, like the bitch persona ever actually goes away. It just transforms!

    Usedtobeme, your girls probably think Shia’s hot.

    Paticus, seriously?

    Poppy, Jesus might not help. But I will!

    Liquid, oh yeah- forgot about that trailer! That was cool!

    Lisa, you’ve never heard of Transformers? You know, like the most popular toy of the late 80s?

  25. Avitable

    Jen in OK, everybody has something to add!

    Poppy, it’s very special.

    Brittinski, yup.

    Sarcastica, well, I’m intimidated by your inability to spell.

    Crystal, your nudity would be fine with me.

    Poppy, I vote for Crystal’s.

  26. Avitable

    Stacy, hi. Thanks for joining us.

    Joefish, you get beatings whenever you want. I owe you that much at least.

    Mistress Yoda, not if you feel like it’s the total truth. Then you think it’s a fact, not an opinion.

    Poppy, yeah, it is an easier decision as a bearded man.

    Steph, of course I do! I love when my favorite bloggers comment! And thanks in advance for the addition to the Puppy Monster fund.

    GDG, never. I had no idea you actually read my blog, so this makes your contribution that much more significant.

    Sarcastica, damn Canada and its shitty education system!

  27. Mistress Yoda

    I like to take stuff like this and learn more from it. I sometimes listen to Conservative radio just to get a starting point and then I try to learn as much more as I can. I usually ask Mr. Yoda to explain the rest…

  28. Wendy

    Been reading you for a while but couldn’t find six intelligent words to string together for a comment – so I lurked – but now I am coming out of lurkdom solely to use this smiley :boobs3: well…just because..

  29. Avitable

    Mistress Yoda, I’m glad you do that. Many people don’t.

    Sarcastica, makes sense!

    Erica, yup. I am.

    Trish, awesome. I’ll check it out.

    Wendy, thanks for delurking, and nice smiley choice.

  30. Avitable

    Tabz, Rotten Tomatoes has given it a pretty high rating. I mean, it’s mindless, but it is definitely fun and kick ass.

    Peter, I like him when he does movies like The Rock and Armageddon – just complete popcorn flicks. They’re fun to watch and turn your brain off.

  31. Paticus

    I’ve been thinking about this..You have told us, but have you told Michael Bay how you feel about him ?
    Perhaps he has some feelings for you as well.
    You will never know if you don’t take that chance !!

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