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Pet peeves

After being sick for a week, and then out of town for a party in Lexington, Kentucky, yesterday was the day that I finally caught up on the thousand plus blogs that were mocking me from the depths of my feedreader.  One of the posts I read was Loukia’s post about annoyances, and I thought I’d turn it into a post of my own as well.

What annoys me?

  • A couple who sits on the same side of a booth or table at a restaurant.  For fuck’s sake, you can’t have a real conversation sitting like that, and if you really need to make physical contact throughout your entire goddamn meal, just hold hands across the table or put your feet in each other’s respective crotches.
  • Speed limits on major highways.  I think if we removed all speed limits on interstates and major roads, you’d see that the speeds would normalize.  I’m going to drive 90-95 miles an hour regardless of a little metal white sign that tells me how fast other people should be driving, so fast drivers aren’t going to drive faster without speed limits.  People will drive at the speeds at which they feel safe driving.
  • The lack of attention people pay to their surroundings. For example, waiting in line to go through security at the airport with SIX BAJILLION signs telling you to have your ID and boarding pass out, and announcements being made all around you to the same effect, yet there’s one idiot who has never flown before who has to fumble for his wallet to pull out his ID and then find his boarding pass which he’s managed to misplace in the walk from the airline counter to security.
  • Emailing, commenting, or texting like you are a 12-year old who had a stroke and can’t use one hand or see out of either eye.  If I have to sound out the letters you are writing to figure out what the holy fuck you’re saying, I’m not going to read it.  That means you too, Mom.
  • This whole “one space after a period” thing.  NO.  I don’t give a flying shit if the two space rule only came about because of monospacing on typewriters.  It looks cleaner, it’s easier to read, and I.  WILL.  PUT.  TWO.  GODDAMN.  SPACES.
  • Parents who think that children shouldn’t have fun.  When I read about people like the Tiger Mother and those who support her extreme, draconian way of child-rearing, it just frustrates me.  It is NOT okay to prevent your child from having fun.  It IS bad parenting.  YOU ARE A BAD PARENT.
  • Sour grapes.  If you don’t get sponsored to go somewhere, if you can’t afford to take a trip somewhere, if you didn’t get chosen for anything, yes, it sucks.  Bitching about the people who are doing things you wish you could is petty, obnoxious, and probably indicative of why you’re sad and bitter and not being chosen.
  • Ryan Gosling.  I’m sorry – I’ve seen “The Notebook” and “Blue Valentine” and he’s just dead fucking weight.  He constantly looks like he just shit his pants, and I think that’s his type of method acting.  Go do something else instead.  Go be a great method construction worker or something.  Please.

I’m interested to hear what your pet peeves are as well, unless one of them is “people who make lists of their pet peeves” because that’s been done before and by someone better than you.  So, what annoys you?

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57 Replies to “Pet peeves”

  1. Janelle

    I am with you on the two spaces after a period. It’s how it should be. And the texting like a 12 yr old, my Hubby does that and it annoys me way more than it should. I can’t spell worth a crap, but at least I try (unless I run out of space on twitter).

  2. Dave2

    This could be a very long list. But here’s five off the top of my head…
    1) Gum-smacking whores… or anybody incapable of chewing with their mouth closed.
    2) People who clip their nails in public, flinging pieces of finger nail everywhere.
    3) Americans who feel that their religious views should dictate law in a country which has a government that’s supposed to be independent of religion.
    4) Movies or television show writers who makes characters do obscenely stupid shit, when they are otherwise normal characters… or make them go into hysterics because that’s what they consider to be “drama.”
    5) Dumbasses whose favorite musician or group is somebody like Justin Bieber or The Jonas Brothers who go out of their way to be critical of great artists with ACTUAL musical talent like The Beatles.

  3. Adrienne

    I totally and completely agree with the first one, makes no damn sense to me at all.

    One of my biggest pet peeves is in pronunciation. The letter I is pronounced I not A it is famIly not famAHly. It is Immunity, Jeff Probst not AHmunnity! I want everyone to correct themselves Immediately not AHmediately!

  4. Valerie

    Slow Apple software updates. When it says 8 hrs remaining my heart sinks. One of my MBA teammates goes through the papers I write on behalf of the team and erases the 2nd space after periods. That frustrates me.

  5. Laurie

    Wow. You’re angry today! I agree with all (especially the double spacing), except I never spent much time thinking about Ryan Gosling. I think he’s okay, but now that you mention it he DOES totally have the shit-your-pants look.

  6. Lisa

    Ohmygod with the 1 space after a period! I learned 2 spaces, I’m going to use 2 spaces, and people who don’t like it can suck it!

    Let’s see…today’s pet peeves:
    1. Gossips. No, I’m not going to tell you why soandso just left my office pissed. It’s really nunyabusiness.
    2. People who like to poke fun without knowing all the facts.
    3. Pussies. If you have a problem with me have the balls to tell me instead of being passive aggressive.
    4. Crazy. I’ve had it with the crazy that isn’t real diagnosable crazy but such off the wall behavior that it can only be described as crazy. With a side of batshit.
    5. And always… Gum smacking whores.

    Yeah, I had a bad day.

  7. Loukia

    Oh, man, the last few times I’ve been in an airport… me – head – clouds! I left my PASSPORT on the table after going through security… La-di-da…

    So, GREAT list of pet peeves! Love this.

    And you need to spend a summer in Germany so you can drive on the autobahn (sp?) where there is no speed limit because German cars NEED to go fast!

    P.S. Thanks for the link to my post. 🙂

  8. Breigh

    That booth thing drives me crazy too, I just don’t get it!
    I wouldn’t even know where to begin with my list of annoyances at the moment! There are just way way too many.
    You should move to Germany or Luxemburg, you’d be in heaven on their highways!

  9. B.E. Earl

    You mentioned two of Ryan Gosling’s silly romance flicks (that I haven’t seen). But have you seen The Believer, Half Nelson, Murder By Numbers or Lars and the Real Girl? Because he was excellent in those. Especially The Believer.

  10. Employee No. 3699

    Amen to the two spaces after a period. They teach that in grammar school.

    Some of mine have already been mentioned, but I can’t stand people who feel sorry for themselves, but do nothing to change their situation. Especially the ones who have a sense of entitlement. Like the world owes them one big favor after another.

  11. Kirsty

    Soooo many pet peeves, where to start? Hmmm…
    1. The way (many, if not most) French people walk/drive: it’s like they’re the only people on the road/pavement; they don’t look around them, they stop unexpectedly right in the middle to text or whatever, they don’t hold doors open. Drives me batshit crazy! And it comes as no surprise that France has one of the worst deaths-and-injuries-on-the-roads records in Europe (and possibly the world?).
    2. People who walk and text at the same time (this is kind of the same as above, though French people don’t actually need to be texting to be annoying when they walk, it’s natural).
    3. Spitting. It makes my stomach heave when I see someone spit on the street.
    4. I hate it when people won’t give up their seat in public transport for old people or people with little kids – so selfish!
    5. Anyone (but particularly my ex!) who is pathologically incapable of being on time. Being occasionnally late-ish is OK, but systematically? And majorly? Gaaaaahhhhh.

    OK, I’d better stop here I guess as I’ll just end up getting myself all riled up and irritable (as if I weren’t that enough already…).

    PS For the two-spaces thing, yes, that’s what I was taught too (many moons ago, on a non-electric typewriter for the love of God, even though I’m not THAT old), but now that I spend the better part of every day typing, and “justifying” text (is that how you say it? You know, when the text is all lined up straight down both margins, in a block, not all random on the right), when you have two spaces it can make the words really spaced out (and not in the good way!) so I now do only one. But it was a hard habit to break!

  12. Tiffany

    I absolutely adore my children and I realize that rearranging my pantry must be a lot of fun… but it’s driving me batshit crazy. I try to contain my OCD to the pantry and they insist on putting things in odd places.

    It also drives me nuts when people can’t take the time (or brainpower) to use words or basic puncuation correctly. (I agree with using two spaces after a period. However, I apparently got out of the habit of doing it at some point. My OCD just made me go back and count the spaces… and add another.)

    My biggest is probably the general lack of manners that most people have become accustomed to. Is it really that hard to hold the door for the little old lady or the mom trying to wrestle 3 kids? Please. Thank you. You’re welcome. Excuse me. They seem to be used less all the time.

  13. hello haha narf

    I have only sat on the same side of a booth once and I gotta tell you, it was a perfect and magical date. So basically, fuck you if you hate it, it wasn’t about you and I loved that day. Why you gotta be a hater, especially just a few days after preaching that people have to celebrate Valentine’s Day?


  14. Blondefabulous

    You hate me. HHH and I sometimes sit on the same side of the table. I was taught to do the two space thing in HS. It was a requirement for anything I had to turn in…. double spaced, and 2 spaces after every period.

    What annoys me is the fact people don’t use common courtesy on the road anymore. No turn signals, no speed minimum or maximum, turning out in front of someone and going 2 mph…. sigh. I just want to snap someones neck sometimes!!

  15. cagey

    The couple thing? Hell to the YES. Husband and I were married through the Catholic church and we had to attend a little “Pre-Approval Class” before the marriage. During the lunch break, my husband and I noticed that we were the ONLY couple sitting opposite to each other.

    Also, I think a cursory audit of the spaces in my comment should be enough to tell you what I think about THAT particular travesty.

    My pet peeve? Loud cell phone conversations. Say, for example, I am on an elliptical machine in a crowded, noisy gym and am listening to my iPod. Say, for example, a guy gets on the machine next to me and proceeds to conduct a business call that I can hear over the noisy gym and my headphones? That is rude and the guy is too fucking loud.

  16. The Domestic Goddess

    Two spaces after periods! THANK YOU! I have had issues with this! At least it isn’t me.

    Pet Peeves:
    -people who don’t train their pets
    -people who shouldn’t get pets and then dump them in shelters
    -people who are too dumb to properly belt their children in while driving
    -people who text or talk on their cellphones while driving. Or put on makeup. Or write things down. While driving. Did I mention? DRIVING.
    -people who are dumb and ignorant when it comes to people with disabilities. And they stare. And make comments. And I want to tell them to STFU. And stop parking in the handicapped spaces, you clearly don’t need to park there and my kid does.

  17. Nenette

    I’m totally with you about the two-spaces-after-the-period thing. It’s what I learned in typing class, and that’s how it should be, dammit!
    Ditto with the abbreviated texting — my cousins do it on Facebook and it makes me want to scream, “You are 45 years old — grow up and type like an adult, you freak!!!”
    Oh, and I was raised by a Tiger Mother/Father. Grrrr. And my parents wonder why I don’t talk to them anymore. My children are allowed to play because I. NEVER. DID.

    I told Loukia that I was going to make my own annoyances list. I should really get around to that.

  18. Christina

    -When did “totes” become an acceptable replacement for “totally”? It needs to stop.
    -The fact that the Teen Mom cast makes more money for being knocked up teens than I did for doing the supposedly right thing by NOT getting pregnant, going to college, and having a career.
    -People who ride in the lane of traffic that is closing while everyone else has already merged, then cutting over at the last possible moment thereby skipping everyone else. I will tailgate to an inch of the car in front of me to prevent the assholes cutting me off.

  19. Grant

    I get annoyed by signs in a different way. “This is the express lane. We know it’s in the middle of the other lanes, but it’s clearly marked. No, not the giant black and yellow sign. No, not the green and black sign. No, none of the other 2,300 signs surrounding that one. It’s written on the little 3×5 card in Sanskrit, done with liquid paper. Don’t you see it? It’s right there behind the other sign saying ‘This lane for people with more than 10 items’ with the bbq flyers taped on top.” I’ve also been warned by a cop about not obeying a traffic sign that literally had another sign bolted on top of it. “It’s clearly marked,” he said.

  20. Megan

    1. Apostrophe abuse. It’s not that hard, people. Really.
    2. People who do not know how to simply say “no” to their children.
    3. Two spaces after a period. I’ve been in publishing for a long time and two spaces makes big holes in the text (especially with a long paragraph) that make my teeth itch.

  21. Sybil Law

    I had to google Ryan Gosling recently because he’s in mah city, making a movie with George Clooney. (Still trying to figure out how I can slip George a ruphy…) I don’t get the appeal – he’s not that attractive.
    Anyway, I have my own list of bitchin’ to do, that I’ll save for my blog.

  22. Mari

    Two spaces? Oh yes – for ever and ever, amen. It’s just the right thing to do.

    – I have to agree with the spitting thing too. I actually hate seeing it happen so much that I scared the crap out of my four year old when he repeated the action he had just witnessed. And I am NOT SORRY.
    – Assholes who wander in tight spaces without regard to ‘traffic’ patterns. For God’s sake people, we’re Americans – WALK ON THE RIGHT!
    – Being forced to repeat myself. If you weren’t paying attention the first time, why should I think you’ll do it this time? It’s a measure of your respect. Dumbass.

  23. AngieM.

    1. people that say ‘fustrated’ instead of frustrated.
    2. do not sit next to me if you chew with your mouth open!
    3. my co-woker’s dialogue as she works- “ok, that’s done. and now i’m going to enter these…ok. great!”
    4. couples that have a joint facebook account.
    5. people that have no sense of personal space. when i’m in line at_____. i ALWAYS leave at least arms length of space in between me and the person in front of me. if i could smell you, YOU are too damn close to me!!!

    i could go on, but i’ll stop now.

  24. martymankins

    Great list. The couple sitting on the same side bothers me, as does the parenting thing. And having seen both “The Notebook” and most recently “Blue Valentine”, I have to disagree with Ryan being dead weight. Although The Notebook was not my style, I thought he did ok. And with Blue Valentine, Michelle was tops over Ryan, I thought Ryan was still an integral part of the film.

    As for my list of pet peeves,

    1. If you are driving and you are in the far left lane and you realize you need the next right, you should have fucking planned sooner. Don’t tie up traffic because of your lack of proper driving. Go around the block and come back into the proper lane.

    2. When you get bad service, tip less. Don’t leave without leaving any tip at all. Tipping less sends the proper message. Leaving no tip tells them you are the asshole.

    3. When having multiple windows open on my computer, there’s always one app that magically activates itself while you are typing in another, causing you to type all of your text into the non-intended app.

    I have more, but those are my recent top 3.

  25. Blue Eyes

    Ok for all of you people that are mad because you and your significant other are a same side couple, fuck you. I work in a restaurant and every time I see a couple sit down on the same side it just puzzles me. How can you have a conversation sitting that way. And everyone who works in that restaurant will give you funny looks and will be making fun of you, but you probably won’t notice because you’re staring at the side of your gf/bf’s head. The ONLY! time it’s appropriate to sit on the same side with someone, is if there’s another couple sitting across the table from you.

    Now onto one of my annoyances. People who wait until I’ve walked them to their table all the way at the back of the restaurant to ask for a booth. Did you seriously not think of that until right now??? If you like sitting in booths and you always sit in a booth no matter what restaurant you’re in, ASK FOR A BOOTH WHEN YOU WALK IN!!! If you get some cheap thrill out of chancing it, you really need to get a life and stop wasting my time.

    Another thing, foreigners who sit down where ever the hell they feel like, then pretend they don’t speak English when I try to kick them out of the table. Too bad I know you’re just being an asshole. You’re getting out of that table!

  26. Kari (aka fiwa)

    Have to tell you, I read this last night after a TERRIBLE day, and it cracked me up and helped me go to sleep with a smile on my face. Thank you.

    All of yours + all of Dave’s +

    The constant misuse of their/they’re.
    People who buy huge, honkin cars/trucks/SUVs and then can’t park them.

  27. Issa

    I adore your list.

    People who drive under the speed limit in the slow lane.

    People on Twitter who only RT what other people are saying. Have an original thought or go the fuck away. If I wanted to see what those other people were saying non-stop, I’d follow them.

    Pedestrians who just step out into traffic. While you may have the right of way technically, it’s still extremely stupid.

    People who talk on the phone and text during movies. Oh even better, the ones who then giggle and show their friends the text.

  28. Mo

    Okay, I have to take issue with the two spaces after the period thing. It’s unnecessary. When I worked as an editor the first thing I’d do when I opened a document was find and replace with ONE space.

    Adding to your list? Women who pee on the toilet seat in public restrooms. Or on the floor. Really, ladies? You aren’t a 4-year-old boy who can’t quite control the direction. Sit on the damn paper thing or at least squat directly over the bowl.

    Too much information? Sorry. It’s a hot button.

  29. Not Adam Avitable but somebody better. No beard!

    Regarding two spaces… I’m not going to going to go on with which I prefer or which I use as it’s obvious… That being said, look back through your posts. You’re pretty inconsistent. The Valentine’s post for example, all 1 space. Some of them you jump from one space to two in the same post!

    What’s the deal? I understand somebody wanting to do it one way or the other, but you come across as schizophrenic.

  30. rose duggan

    excellent post, particularly a fuck yes about the two spaces after a period. i just can’t fathom a world of only one space. everything would feel so crowded and suffocating.

    oh, and sour grapes. life is too short to piss away your time being bitter and jeals.

  31. Poppy

    I just saw a couple sitting on the same side of the table last weekend! The guy was blocking the girl in, like he was in control of her. Yick, blech, *patooey*

    I think we’re saying the same thing about sour grapes when I say: It’s not my job to make sure you have a great life. Make your own great life, asswipe. (The you in that statement is used in the general sense.) It bugs me when people decide that because people around them are getting awesome stuff they are automagically entitled to said same good stuff. EARN IT.

    What annoys me: Sitting on a packed train of everyone sitting in silence on a Monday morning when no one’s ready for sound yet and Talkers enter the car. LOUD Talkers. Talkers who penetrate earphones. Talkers who want you to hear their business but if you acknowledge their existence they will tell you to mind your own fucking business.

  32. Darla

    I am with you on the two spaces after a period in a sentence.

    However, I have a grievance about you picking on your poor mom. You are lucky she wants to text your sorry ass at all. No wait that sounded wrong. What I mean to say was she probably loves you very much and *yawn* – nope I’m sticking with the sorry ass comment.

  33. Krissy

    I seriously just found my soul mate, I do believe! I almost fell OUT when I read the one about the two spaces. People always look at me funny when I mention that, and I’ve just recently conformed to not be crazy obsessive about doing it anymore. I still do it sometimes though. Way to go for sticking to your guns though! I am not worthy…

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