After being sick for a week, and then out of town for a party in Lexington, Kentucky, yesterday was the day that I finally caught up on the thousand plus blogs that were mocking me from the depths of my feedreader. One of the posts I read was Loukia’s post about annoyances, and I thought I’d turn it into a post of my own as well.
What annoys me?
- A couple who sits on the same side of a booth or table at a restaurant. For fuck’s sake, you can’t have a real conversation sitting like that, and if you really need to make physical contact throughout your entire goddamn meal, just hold hands across the table or put your feet in each other’s respective crotches.
- Speed limits on major highways. I think if we removed all speed limits on interstates and major roads, you’d see that the speeds would normalize. I’m going to drive 90-95 miles an hour regardless of a little metal white sign that tells me how fast other people should be driving, so fast drivers aren’t going to drive faster without speed limits. People will drive at the speeds at which they feel safe driving.
- The lack of attention people pay to their surroundings. For example, waiting in line to go through security at the airport with SIX BAJILLION signs telling you to have your ID and boarding pass out, and announcements being made all around you to the same effect, yet there’s one idiot who has never flown before who has to fumble for his wallet to pull out his ID and then find his boarding pass which he’s managed to misplace in the walk from the airline counter to security.
- Emailing, commenting, or texting like you are a 12-year old who had a stroke and can’t use one hand or see out of either eye. If I have to sound out the letters you are writing to figure out what the holy fuck you’re saying, I’m not going to read it. That means you too, Mom.
- This whole “one space after a period” thing. NO. I don’t give a flying shit if the two space rule only came about because of monospacing on typewriters. It looks cleaner, it’s easier to read, and I. WILL. PUT. TWO. GODDAMN. SPACES.
- Parents who think that children shouldn’t have fun. When I read about people like the Tiger Mother and those who support her extreme, draconian way of child-rearing, it just frustrates me. It is NOT okay to prevent your child from having fun. It IS bad parenting. YOU ARE A BAD PARENT.
- Sour grapes. If you don’t get sponsored to go somewhere, if you can’t afford to take a trip somewhere, if you didn’t get chosen for anything, yes, it sucks. Bitching about the people who are doing things you wish you could is petty, obnoxious, and probably indicative of why you’re sad and bitter and not being chosen.
- Ryan Gosling. I’m sorry – I’ve seen “The Notebook” and “Blue Valentine” and he’s just dead fucking weight. He constantly looks like he just shit his pants, and I think that’s his type of method acting. Go do something else instead. Go be a great method construction worker or something. Please.
I’m interested to hear what your pet peeves are as well, unless one of them is “people who make lists of their pet peeves” because that’s been done before and by someone better than you. So, what annoys you?