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Thanks to all of the terrible human beings in the world

To the haters and gnashers and petty game players;
To the sullen servers and bitter bartenders;
To the hitters and runners and constant naysayers;
To the pretty faces with ugly insiders;
I say thanks for the chance to feel better ’bout me.

If you’re passive-aggressive and have no conviction;
If your glass is half full even filled to the brim;
If you’re a victim who complains about everyone’s actions;
If your view of the world is entirely too dim;
Thank you so much for showing who I don’t want to be.

No, the world’s not always a big bed of roses;
Or maybe it is, but we get pricked by the thorns;
But don’t look around you and turn up your noses;
Make yourself happy and grab the world by the horns;
It’s not hard to be thankful no matter what you see.

Thank you, driver with his finger held high;
Thank you, unwashed man with the unzipped fly;
Thank you, lover who prefers to tell lies;
Thank you, parents with kids unsupervised;
You help me appreciate the world, thankfully.

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